[lily99]

I've been really drawn to threads about inner child healing and the way everyone seems to be getting in touch with their little child inside.

I'm really interested in trying this! How did you begin? Were you guided by your T? I struggle with feeling powerless in my life, as I'm still forced to deal with my dad who is emotionally abusive. There's something about this that appeals to me because it's taking the healing into your own hands.

Although I'm sure it's challenging, is it also liberating? Sorry for all the questions, I'm just really curious.

One last very silly question - I'm only 17, still really becoming an adult. Does this mean this kind of thing isn't really....relevant to me? I feel like it is. Like there's still a child inside of me that needs some attention and care...especially because there's more pressure all the time on me to become this adult that I have no idea how to become.

Anyway...thanks for reading.

lily

I'm so sorry you have to deal with an emotionally abusive father.

I've been in therapy for 7 months now. When I first started and found PC, I was also very drawn to the inner child threads. T and I talked some about how to access my inner child - T told me to be unreasonable, which to me sounded like throwing a temper tantrum - something I never did as a child... but maybe I needed to do it, so those feelings are all still there!

I started with what came to mind first, and that was to get a new stuffed animal, because I had a lot of them as a child, and to color, because I used to love to color, it brought me joy.

Last week in session, I read T the first letters my little one has written to T. After each session, I journal - I wrote down after that session that I felt liberated, exactly! I have a long way to go, and the feelings can be overwhelming for me sometimes, but it is feeling good to know that I can heal the child within.

I think 17 is a great age to get in touch with that inner child - you're closer in memory to that child self, which is great. And you're not quite yet an adult, so you can slip back into 'little girl mode' sometimes. I'm in my early 30s, and I feel like it's unacceptable for me to expect anyone to take care of me at this age. But at your age of 17, you're still a child in many ways - allow T and others who care about you to take care of you. For me, the turning point to my inner child really coming out strong was the first time T hugged me - I just let it all in, all that caring from T, and it was such a wonderful feeling. My little ones felt it, they really did. And I'm realizing that even at my age, I still need someone to take care of me sometimes.

[lily99]

thanks dreamseeker
Being unreasonable would be very hard for me. I'm very conscious to be a "good" client. I don't ask for much at all in therapy - I would feel guilty for making her get me a glass of water when she offered. It's energy draining having such big needs but with no voice to ask.

I love that you're coloring! who doesn't like to color? My T also suggested dragging out my childhood toy, and I bought a brand new journal today! hopefully it'll serve as a new way to communicate stuff to T when I feel stuck.

I agree that you sometimes need care as well... please keep us posted on how this aspect of your healing goes. I'm certainly interested.

Take care

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by lily99

Being unreasonable would be very hard for me. I'm very conscious to be a "good" client. I don't ask for much at all in therapy - I would feel guilty for making her get me a glass of water when she offered. It's energy draining having such big needs but with no voice to ask.

Hi Lily! This ^ would be a good place to start because getting in touch with that inner child requires tuning into her needs and voicing them and getting those needs met.........

[lily99]

Hi Lily! This ^ would be a good place to start because getting in touch with that inner child requires tuning into her needs and voicing them and getting those needs met.........

Thanks Sannah, I know you're right. But I'm trying to imagine myself saying it, and I feel like I wouldn't be able to admit I had such needs. Not so much because of embarrassment, more in a way that I'd doubt they even should exist.

It's weird, because I know for sure I have these massive needs and I can admit to it here...but if I had my T in front of me I'd start convincing myself "Don't be silly, you're lying. T won't understand what you're talking about because what you're saying is ludicrous" type thinking.

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by lily99

But I'm trying to imagine myself saying it, and I feel like I wouldn't be able to admit I had such needs. Not so much because of embarrassment,

more in a way that I'd doubt they even should exist.

Then start here then? Understand WHY you feel you shouldn't have needs.

Hi Lily,

I am not sure how to access the inner child, but am learning. I just wanted to say bravo for you being in T and healing stuff from your past at such a young age! yay! It is very brave of you and at least you didn't wait for as long as I did (I am 40) . Good luck and enjoy coloring.