how to handle this?..........

Very good work!!!!!

When we grow up in a dysfunctional home we do tend to feel that if we meet our needs that this will hurt someone else. Such a thing to learn in childhood and this is what we learned (that meeting our needs would hurt someone else).............

Thank you Sannah

I've not really thought about the fear of having my needs met- but I think you might have something there...... gee.

Like, I needed comfort(as a child) when finally released from being held hours by a teen -with a gun to my back-- but mother didn't want to make "waves" in the neighborhood...... so her need was met and mine was ignored. guess I learned that needs are for others and mine is to disappear. so so many other traumas where I was expected to be "invisible" and silent....... I guess it's understandable that this new frontier would be giving me anxiety and stomach problems..... *sigh*

hope I can get to the other side of this all.......

You will get through it fins and to the other side if you keep up this work. Keep staying aware and working through it and take good care of yourself along the way!

Thank you again Sannah
I don't think most people realize how it feels for some of us to have one or two persons that notice us and show they care.... it means so so much.
thank you (and if you're reading-- thank you my PM buddy... hope it's OK that I said that)

It's like the T. I see-- the other day I was telling her how I have to go for yet another medical procedure this week (ugh-- the third in as many months and specialist says I have at least one more...)-- but H. is out of town and so T. compassionately asked me(as she knows I've 0 friends and the mother certainly won't help me) if I need a ride to the clinic and back home again...... I was taken aback for a moment..... T. would actually wonder about that?? I'm so not used to being considered ... probably sounds dumb of me..... and it feels real strange....

thanks again for keeping up with me in my struggles...... I appreciate it.



fins

(((((((((((( fins!! )))))))))))))

WOW!!!! That is just so totally A W E S O M E that you brought this up with T and allowed her to clarify the situation for you!!! I am just so impressed!!! Those kind of things are so big!! What an awesome step forward you just made!!!

OH! You are so kind. Thank you so much WePow.

I'm still anxious about it all-- waiting for T.'s anger or hurt feelings, that I caused, to make a presence..... but...... hoping that time will show me my "warning voice" is wrong this time.... I hope.... I hope.....
I've usually not stuck around long enough to see if the voice was wrong or not. too fearful I guess.... and protective.....

thanks again WePow.

Aw, fins, I just got a little misty...... And the other good thing about all of this is that you are open to receiving!

I understand how you got to this place, I really do........