[moonrise]

I had a dream last night where I (gulp) had sex with my T. I'm not romantically attracted to her, I'm straight, and....ugh. She's psychodynamic, and we talk a lot about dreams. What could this possibly mean? And how the heck do I tell her? I'm embarassed, because I don't think of her like that. I also dreamed I was being forced to canibalize, and that I killed my brother. It was a crazy night. Any thoughts? I'd love to find out what it means, but I have NO thoughts on how to bring it up. Oh, and I see her tomorrow.

[ECHOES]

What an interesting dream to talk about tomorrow!
Might be helpful to just begin with "What a wild dream I had the other night. And parts of it are embarassing and hard to talk about."

[chaotic13]

I would say just because you and your T talk about some of your dreams, doesn't mean you HAVE to talk about every one of them. Maybe just talk about the things you are currently comfortable with talking about. Maybe from these discussions you will be able to analyze the other stuff. IDK I've discussed some wacky dreams with my T. These discussions are interesting, but in the end I'm really the only one who can really figure out what they mean. Also, I think we have dreams that really don't mean anything, there just dreams. For me, I don't pay attention to a dream unless I have it a few times or unless I wake up after it feeling really disturbed and this feeling doesn't dissipate for a while.

[DivideByZero]

Interestingly enough Jungian Analysts don't believe that sex in a dream has a lot to do with sex at all. I am not sure if that helps.

[moonrise]

Echoes, I like your phrasing! Chaotic, I don't always discuss all my dreams with her, and I may or may not hold back. I rarely dream about my T, though, and I think it may have some interesting things to say about how I feel about her. I've struggled on and off with her, feeling safe/unsafe, like she gets me or is clueless. In my dream, she also saw some of the scars I had hidden, and I'm thinking it's more along the lines of, "my T is really getting to know the deeper parts of me" or something along those lines. But heck, totally embarrassing. I don't want her to flip out on me, or think I'm sexually attracted to her, because I'm not.

[WePow]

Moonrise.... this is just my insight and may or may not fit you. As my T tells me "I will toss it out there and you can try it on to see if it fits or not." :-)

Dreams about sex with people we are not sexually interested in are rarely about sex.
:-) Sex is an act of allowing another human to be intimate within our beingness.
For one thing, that emotional area inside your soul is very special and guarded (as it should be). You would not allow just anyone into that part of who you are!

I say to share the dream with T. And I think the dream is wonderful and very healthy.
It says "I am not sure about letting you into who I am this deeply... but I am willing to trust you and to open my heart for you." It is a desire to allow her that close to you mixed with a fear of allowing that to happen.

Just my 2 pennies there.

[WePow]

I was writing my reply to your post and then just saw your additional note. Cool!

[moonrise]

WePow, that's what I needed to hear. That even though it was about sex, it **wasn't** about sex, YKWIM? Just knowing that is enough to allow me to share it, I hope. I struggle with T knowing me deeply. Maybe this is a sign that I'm ready to start. My dreams are usually quite telling about my subconscious.

[WePow]

Moon - bravo for you!!! I sense that by sharing this dream, you will open doors into an even deeper and more profound relationship with your T.

[ECHOES]

moonrise, she won't flip out on you She will be fascinated and will help you understand it so it doesn't feel so embrassing. Remember, T's have heard about everything.
Sex could be a metaphor; for comfort, intimacy, safety,...
I think it might be very relieving for you to tell her about your dream.

[moonrise]

Divide, that's great, because I've seen Jungian books on her bookcase. Phew. I hope I can do this!!!

[ECHOES]

moonrise, I'm sharing this with you because I believe that dreams are important and very much like free-association. Without being awake to conciously censor our thoughts, they become fascinating and meaningful dreams.
This is something I keep around because it helps me to read it.
My T is psychodynamic/psychoanalytic.
Anyway, food for thought perhaps


from:
http://www.answers.com/topic/free-association

It is in "On Beginning the Treatment" (1913c) that Freud made these ideas explicit: "One more thing before you start. What you tell me must differ in one respect from an ordinary conversation. Ordinarily you rightly try to keep a connecting thread running through your remarks and you exclude any intrusive ideas that may occur to you and any side-issues, so as not to wander too far from the point. But in this case you must proceed differently. You will notice that as you relate things various thoughts will occur to you which you would like to put aside on the ground of certain criticisms and objections. You will be tempted to say to yourself that this or that is irrelevant here, or is quite up important, or nonsensical, so that there is no need to say it. You must never give in to these criticisms, but must say it in spite of them—indeed, you must say it precisely because you feel an aversion to doing so. Later on you will find out and learn to understand the reason for this injunction, which is really the only one you have to follow. So say whatever goes through your mind. Act as though, for instance, you were a traveler sitting next to the window of a railway carriage and describing to someone inside the carriage the changing views which you see outside. Finally, never forget that you have promised to be absolutely honest, and never leave anything out because, for some reason or other, it is unpleasant to tell it" (p. 135).

[moonrise]

Thanks, Echoes. I'm pretty bad at free association, but like you said, my dreams are where my subconscious can be heard.

[kitten16]

You should relax about any weirdness in dreams. You can't possibly help what you dream about. And you're dreaming what you have to dream at any given time. The mind is always right! So just trust it

Everything in dreams is disguised, so when you dream about sex, you're also dreaming about other things. I've often dreamed about sex with people who were inappropriate for me in real life. Often, for me, dreaming about sex with someone can mean that I'm trying to communicate with them, to achieve intimacy (as wepow said), to bridge distance, etc. I've had dreams where I was having sex with my parents. My relationship with them was pretty terrible, and I believed those images evinced a kind of crazy desire in me to reach them in a fundamental way...

Sex can also have echoes of life-giving energy, etc. Just play with it and see what you come up with, in relation to what you're consciously aware of in your feelings toward your T. I would mention this dream to her, also, BTW!

Originally Posted by moonrise

I had a dream last night where I (gulp) had sex with my T. I'm not romantically attracted to her, I'm straight, and....ugh. She's psychodynamic, and we talk a lot about dreams. What could this possibly mean? And how the heck do I tell her? I'm embarassed, because I don't think of her like that. I also dreamed I was being forced to canibalize, and that I killed my brother. It was a crazy night. Any thoughts? I'd love to find out what it means, but I have NO thoughts on how to bring it up. Oh, and I see her tomorrow.

[moonrise]

Well, I mentioned it to her, and she was cool about it, totally didn't freak out. She even said that it was showing that I am able to trust her more, because it was such an awkward thing for me to bring up. I still feel weird about it, though.

Kitten, interesting thoughts! I'm so glad I'm not alone in my 'weird sex' dreams. I'm glad everyone encouraged me to talk about it.