[seventyeight]

does anyone feel like they need therapy because of therapy? the more i think about it, the more i think this may be true - maybe not totally, but at least partially.

i've also read a lot of posts about the issues that come up in therapy (related to the therapist or the therapy process itself), and from what i can tell - a lot of therapy time is spent dealing with therapist issues and whatnot.

does this bother anyone? i'm sure i'm guilty of it as well, but i was just wondering if anyone else saw the irony in this..

[fieldofdreams]

It's true that a lot of therapy time is often spent dealing with the relationship, but that's not necessarily the same as dealing with therapist issues. The relationship itself IS a big part of the treatment, so it does command a lot of time and attention. I think the hardest part, which made me feel very uncertain about this whole process for quite some time, is that I often believed it was my T whose issues were getting in the way when in reality I had so many defenses and projections and so much negative transference it was impossible for me to recognize that the issues I thought were his were actually my own.
Now, that's not to say there's no bad therapy out there. There is a LOT of bad therapy out there, and sometimes it's very hard to tell if that's the situation you are in or not. Good therapy can sometimes FEEL very bad... while bad therapy can sometimes feel very good.
Somehow I don't think I'm being very helpful here... but yes, in the past I have felt at times that I needed therapy because of therapy. But that's no longer the case because my T has broken through a lot of my defenses and I have, for the most part, relegated control of the process to him. I figure if I'm going to ask a professional for help, I might as well stop insisting that he do things MY way because if my way had been working out so well I wouldn't have needed help to begin with.

[lostmyway]

Hi seventyeight...yes, i can totally relate...I guess many T become T because of their own issues it seems and many times i feel as though i feel worse and have more issues than when i first started the process as many times it has to do with the T because of their own insecurities and unresolved issues they bring into the "relationship" and such....

[rainbow8]

Of course I think it's a catch-22! I've thought that ever since I needed to go to another T to "resolve the transference" I got into from seeing my first T. This is now happening again when I recently switched Ts. If I weren't in therapy, this wouldn't happen!!!

However, the fact that it happens to me, and that the transference I experience (or call it addiction or unmet needs) is so profound, is what does matter. It IS the issue for me, or at least one of my primary issues. Not everyone needs more therapy because of therapy. I know lots of people, even some on PC, who don't have that problem. I know people who see a T and don't have much of a relationship with the T at all, yet they benefit from the therapy.

For those of us who for whatever reason make the T so important, and whose therapy is about the relationship, it does seem like a catch-22. But a good T (I hope) is supposed to use the feelings that come up in order to heal the client's original wounds. Or something like that.

[sunrise]

I don't think I need therapy because of therapy. I am very close to my therapist and I have learned from our interactions how to better have a relationship, and how to better communicate with other people. So a big part of my therapy does involve our relationship, but I don't need therapy because of this. Forming a relationship with the T can be a way to heal and accomplish much. The relationship can be motivating and supportive. It can be wonderful, but doesn't create a need in therapy for me. I needed therapy before I went to see a T not because of it. I think if my T were suddenly to die tomorrow (god forbid), I might benefit from going to therapy with someone else to help me grieve. So in this instance, I would be needing therapy because of therapy. But I would tend to see it as needing therapy to help me grieve the loss of someone very close and dear to me.