[hangingon]

I am really bumming tonight. Many of you know how wonderful my relationship has grown with my therapist. It was so hard in the beginning to trust her, took a long time, and now I am finally to the point of really trusting her and connecting so much better. But something happened this week that may totally mess that up for me.

I was just offered a great nursing positon at a mental health facility, which I am so thrilled about because as a new graduate it has been impossible to get in with little experience and with so little turn over right now.

The problem is that the work hours will all be evening hours, which is when I see my therapist because she works full time during the day doing counseling at a univeristy. This means that I will most likely not be able to see her anymore, and that is killing me after all the work I have done with her, and after finally getting to the point of really trusting her.

I don't know what to do, there is no way that I could not accept the job offer, it was too great an offer. I could sit here and cry a lot over this, not that that will help. I am so bummed that I will be transitioning into a whole new field and most likey have to lose my T in the process, especially at a time when I will really need her This makes me extremely sad, I can't imagine ever starting over with someone else.
I don't even know how I am going to break this news to her, it's too hard to even think about....

ps..sorry for my title spelling error... my brain is just not with it tonight...

Hangingon

[ECHOES]

Talk to her first, and see.
When I mentioned that I was considering doing something that could mean not being available when my therapist currently sees patients, and how much that was influencing my decision, she seemed surprised and asked "Don't you think we could work something out?"

So, talk to her and see what's what. You never know.

Congratulations on your new job!

[cmac13]

I totally can relate to the difficulty in trusting your therapist and the time it has taken to get to that point. It has taken me 20 years with the same T and even now at times I have difficulty. We talked just last week about this. She knows how hard it has been for me and she even said that if I were to start over with another therapist she knows that the trust issues would need so much time to develop with someone new. (not that I am looking for another therapist) I feel your pain = such a difficult thing to come to terms with after so much time with someone. I am happy you have a new employment opportunity yet I know the sadness you must feel. Keep us posted.

I can understand how worrisome this is....but I'd wait and talk to your T before you get too upset. There might be a way to work it out.

I know my T has seen me early in the mornings before regular work hours before.

You might just work something out.

Wow.

first, congrats on the new job. that is really cool.

second, talk to your T before you jump to any conclusions. who knows what will happen, but before you assume the worst, speak with her. i know Ts make schedule changes, whether they do it consistently i don't know, but it can't hurt to ask.

good luck.

[Melbadaze]

Hangingon, yes congrats on the job, sorry about how it effects your therapy though, sometimes its hard to see how things can be worked out.

[Perna]

Originally Posted by hangingon

This means that I will most likely not be able to see her anymore

Don't get ahead of yourself; check it out with her, are you a graduate of the same school she counsels at during the day? May be you can still see her, during the day, if that's the case and/or she may have some weekend or other hours you don't know about, etc.

Check out the hours at the new job too; over time, you may be able to get a different shift so you could just take a break from seeing her and work some one your own and then go back to "report" on how well you're doing :-) I had 9 years between seeing my T, partly because I got a new job and moved too far away for the moment, and that worked out fine.

[hangingon]

Thank you guys for all of your thoughts.

I am going to bring it up when I see her tomorrow. I am really nervous about it because I know she doesn't work on the weekend because she has children, and I know she works full-time somewhere else during the day, so she only does her private practice two nights a week, later in the evening and that's when I will be working. I don't know how its going to go and things are so crazy right now that I really need to see her and not switch at this point. I really hope something works out because this would be such a bad time for change. Too many changes as it is right now

Sorry I did not get on here and respond to you all sooner, it has been a yucky few days.

Thank you for your congrats on my new job that change I am nervous about but very much looking forward to !

Hangingon

[rainbow8]

Congratulations on your new job! I agree with the others. Your T may be able to work something out. Maybe she will see you less often, but will make time to squeeze you in on a week-end. What about phone sessions? I know it's far from ideal, but one T I had suggested it when I said there was no way I get to where she moved her office. I didn't take her up on her offer, but she seemed to think it would be fine. I hope your T has some ideas how you can still see or speak with her. Don't be discouraged yet!

[sittingatwatersedge]

Yikes, please let us know how it goes with yr T.

hoping the best for you

[hangingon]

Good news, I shared with my therapist about the schedule issue tonight and she looked me and said ok, we will work something out on Saturdays. She said that that day may be a little rough at times in the summer but we will make it work. I love her lol, she's the best :-)

I so thought I was going to go in there and ball my eyes out, but I was totally my adult self. We talked about so much stuff in one session, it was crazy. There are some things that I think about now and wonder where in the heck did that come from, what started that conversation lol....but it was great!

Thank you all for your support.....feeling so much better now !!!

[rainbow8]

That's wonderful news!!! I am so happy for you! Ts really do try to accomodate us!

YEAH! that is great! a new job and you get to keep T

and good for your T for realizing the importance of your new job and her importance to you.

so glad it worked out...

[velcro003]

yay! glad to hear that hanginon

[sittingatwatersedge]

Originally Posted by hangingon

Good news, I shared with my therapist about the schedule issue tonight and she looked me and said ok, we will work something out on Saturdays.

wahoo!! that's GREAT!!

[Perna]

I use to love make-up days with my T on Saturdays! It was much less stressful and comfortable/comforting and one feels special and getting up, throwing on jeans, and going to T from home and without traffic. . . That really is great that your T is willing to do that for you.