My t and I have had some terrific, yet difficult, sessions these last few weeks. Yesterday he walked me through the timeline of my abuse as a teenager and we pieced all the pieces together.

When we were done, he asked me what I want to do with it now. I'm ready to set that part of my life aside. It holds no power over me now. I've dealt with it for all these years, but until now I haven't gotten through it all. Now I have and I really don't feel much about it. I can talk about it without it tearing me apart, without dissociating, without blaming myself for the events, without much emotion anymore actually. It is just a series of events and memories that have no more power than any other events or memories in my life.

It's liberating it be here. Just celebrating I guess. Had to share. This has been a LLOOONNNNNGGGGGG road.

[mixedup_emotions]

Wow, Chris! That's awesome!! I'm so glad you've gotten to this point in your long, hard journey.....((( HUGS )))

[SpottedOwl]

Excellent work!!!

I think you should do something (aside from posting here) to celebrate this achievement. Treat yourself in some way, or grab a small cake and celebrate this as a new beginning.

Thank you for sharing with us, I just think this warrants some outside celebration as well.

I think you're right. I wonder what I can do for me as a pat on the back. Hmm. I'll have to think about that.

[sittingatwatersedge]

Chris this is one of the best things I have heard all week. Great news!!

[zooropa]

that is wonderful! thank you for sharing that with us. It gives me hope that I'll be at that place in my own journey some day.

((((((((Chris)))))))

What an incredible point to reach. My T has told me since the beginning of therapy that someday I would have power over my past, instead of it having power over me. It was almost impossible for me to even imagine what that would look like. I'm getting closer, and it's so SO awesome to read that you're there and that it really truly is possible.

I agree with Spotted Owl...I hope you find a symbolic way to mark the occasion.

SUCH good work.

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

It holds no power over me now. I've dealt with it for all these years, but until now I haven't gotten through it all.

Wow--that must feel so good to finally be at this point. Congratulations. What you wrote gave me hope that someday I will finally "get through it all" too. It seems like I should have had enough time to do that in therapy but we are still not through everything. It sounds like it took you a while, but you just didn't give up and stuck with it and came out the other side. I agree with the celebration idea!

[Perna]

Wonderful! Let us know how you celebrate :-)

[WePow]

Chris, I thought about you today when I was talking with my T. He was telling me that clients who went through trauma were some of the "hardest working" clients he had. And I thought about how hard you have been working on your healing.

You deserve this freedom. You give me hope.

[elliemay]

I know this feeling. It's like standing up and shrugging off a 2000 lb weight from your back. Life is lighter.

True freedom is shrugging off the habits though. The pain may be gone, but there are residuals.

You can master them too.

Walk on my friend and be lighter.

Well, my husband and I went out and had a double celebration. His birthday and my freedom. It was a great evening. I see my t again tomorrow. Can't wait to tell him how I'm doing.

[rainbow8]

I'm very happy for you, Chris! You've worked very hard to be where you are. I'm glad you and your husband went out to celebrate!!

Had another really productive session with t yesterday. He was so pleased to see how well I'm doing. He said a year ago, I would have gone down a hole after having discussed my abuse in the detail we did last week. I've apparently come a long way. I feel like I have too.

We spent our session this week talking about my relationship with my husband. Nothing earth-shattering.

[WikidPissah]

that is so inspiring! When I grow up I want to be like you

[geez]

((Chris)) That's so great! You give us hope that peace is achievable. Many thanks!