[rainbow8]

If I die tonight, at least I know the collage I gave my T is up on her office wall! She said she was going to, but I thought it would happen "some day". But there it is, right under her degree! I didn't sign it. She says I still can but I don't know if I want to or not. Maybe just my first name.

I asked what would she say if a client asks where it came from. She said she would say "a client did it." I told her I'd be jealous if I heard that. I know that Bt didn't want to put my poem up on her wall because of that reason. My T doesn't seem worried about what other clients think. Of course a collage isn't a poem, and she does have a lot of artwork on the walls. Maybe some is from other clients. I never have time to look!

Anyway, I'm feeling kind of down about other stuff, and the session didn't solve anything yet, but it gave me such a lift to see my present on T's wall! I talked in the session about feeling like a failure, and about the mistakes in my artwork, but she said it was all right the way it is, and she likes it. She said "I like you just the way you are." I said, yeah, Mr. Rogers said that on his TV show, which I always watched with my kids. But I don't like myself that much.

I still can't believe she actually put my picture up on her wall!!

[gelfling]

how totally awesome - rainbow!!!!!!

[deliquesce]

that's so cool, rainbow. i love that your T is doing that for you.
i really like when Ts keep things displayed that their clients have given them - it shows they value the relationship too. it's interesting that you would be jealous if you heard a different client had done some artwork for her; because i find it hard to trust authenticity in relationships, i would actually feel more secure that T had visual displays of her connections.
i'm so happy for you. i'm also so so so super proud of you for sticking it out and finding a T you really seem to connect with. you're doing such great work these days .

[rainbow8]

Deli, that is so nice of you to tell me what you did. Your compliments mean a lot to me!!!!

[WePow]

That is sooooo awesome !!!!!!!!

Originally Posted by deliquesce

i really like when Ts keep things displayed that their clients have given them - it shows they value the relationship too.

I like this too. I've given things to T over the years, and they are all on his desk...and sometimes I see things appear that other clients give him. It makes me curious...all of the things I have given to T have a meaning behind them, and I wonder what the meaning is of the other clients' gifts.

I gave him one thing in a sealed (like shrinkwrapped) little box. The point of it was what the outside of the box said -it was sort of a running joke we had. One day I took it off of his desk because I wanted to open it. He said "STOP" so I stopped. He said "I'm having a big reaction to this...let me sit with it for a minute". So I waited. And he said "You gave that to me, and I want to leave it just how it is". It made realize that the things that I (and other clients) give to T are meaningful to HIM, not just to me.

I'm so glad your picture is on the wall, Rainbow. It sounds like it really means something to your T. That is so awesome

[ballet_girl]

That is amazing! And I am jealous... I would love to see some of my artwork on my t's wall, but unfortunately she shares her office so she doesn't do things like that. Its also awesome that you are able to put your emotions for your t on paper like that. I bet it means a lot

[Kacey2]

Hey Rainbow,
I am happy for you. That is so special that your t put your collage up on the wall in her office.

quote "Anyway, I'm feeling kind of down about other stuff, and the session didn't solve anything yet, but it gave me such a lift to see my present on T's wall! I talked in the session about feeling like a failure, and about the mistakes in my artwork, but she said it was all right the way it is, and she likes it. She said "I like you just the way you are."quote

I am sorry that you are feeling down. Your session did not solve anything but it was not a waste. You had an opportunity to make a connection and a bond with your t. She let you know that you are that you are a part of her life and she likes you just the way you are. That is cool.

[Miracle1986]

That's awesome rainbow!

[sunrise]

That's wonderful, rainbow! Sorry to hear you are feeling down, but good to hear you got a boost from your session. The "mistakes" in a piece of art make it unique. It wouldn't be art if a perfect robot made it.

[seventyeight]

rainbow, when i read the title of your post, i thought you meant a picture of yourself!

[sittingatwatersedge]

Rainbow! your news made me smile. thanks

[sittingatwatersedge]

Originally Posted by seventyeight

rainbow, when i read the title of your post, i thought you meant a picture of yourself!

so did I lol..... and a picture flashed in my mind of my T having a photo of me on her wall, and a lot of tiny holes in it from the darts... ha ha
good thing there are so few existing pictures of me!!!

[Oceanwave]

Originally Posted by seventyeight

rainbow, when i read the title of your post, i thought you meant a picture of yourself!

That's soooooo funny! Thanks for making me laugh!

[rainbow8]

Thanks for all the nice replies! Sunrise, I really like what you said here:

The "mistakes" in a piece of art make it unique. It wouldn't be art if a perfect robot made it.

I have to remember that. I don't do a lot of things because I'm a perfectionist.

seventyeight, LOL! I wouldn't like it if T put up my photo. Hey, like in an obgyn's office where they put up all the baby pictures. Ts could have a bulletin board of "successes". I guess I should have used the word "collage" or "painting" in my title.

[jexa]

Originally Posted by seventyeight

rainbow, when i read the title of your post, i thought you meant a picture of yourself!

Haha I thought the same thing.

That is awesome, rainbow. I'm glad you found this T. She sounds perfect for you.

[peaches100]

Rainbow,

I think it is SO special that your t put your picture up on her wall! She must really like it! It's so validating, don't you think? Your t really has a heart.

[rainbow8]

Jexa: Yes, I am so fortunate to have found my T. I almost didn't find her! She wasn't on my list of Ts to contact from psychologytoday, but someone in her building struck me as perfect. When I called this other T, she didn't take my insurance so I asked her if she knew anyone like her. She suggested my T!! Then, when I had my first session, my T wanted to send me to other Ts who were more experienced with EMDR. When I called one, and made an appointment, her voice on the phone scared me for some reason so I cancelled the appointment, called my "now T" and told her that. She said to trust my gut, so that's how I ended up with her. I hope you and your new T work out like my new one did.

Peaches: Yes, it's validating. In fact, it means more to me than almost anything any of my Ts in 15 years have done for me. Letting me hold her hand is up there too, but this is different. I wonder if she just did it like a mother would put up her child's artwork even it wasn't good, but I know that's not true. I don't think she could fake how much she likes it.

I also think, and want to tell her, that besides being personal, it could be fitting for any of her clients. I didn't think of that. I mean, it's her appointment cards, which are pretty photographs, and hands touching over that, which is what therapy is all about--the connection. She didn't put up my poem because that was personal, she said.