[geez]

I have until August 1st until my insurance 'expires'. I'm winding down with my T and I have a couple issues left to work out and then I will be done. Feeling a little bit of sadness about how I won't have T in my life when I'm done with therapy. How do I make the transition? How did you make the transition? Anyone? I have this huge empty feeling at the thought of not having T in my life (for the 60minute appt).

My T has talked about tapering off when I'm ready and just recently I've made the decision to go every other week.

any thoughts?

[inbloom]

That's so tough! I'm sorry that you are facing the end of therapy. I don't know if I have any really great advice for you....it may just be one of those things that you just have to *do* and that only time makes easier. I just wanted to offer my support and tell you that I am sorry that you are losing that support system.

[SophiaG]

Originally Posted by inbloom

I am sorry that you are losing that support system.

She still has PC though .

[inbloom]

Originally Posted by SophiaG

She still has PC though .

Yes, most definitely!

[embracinglife]

I'm sorry you're losing your insurance and this is happening. If you still want or need a T after you lose your insurance, you could look for a place that has a sliding fee scale. There are places like this where I live for people without insurance. That is just another option.

[rainbow8]

(((((geez)))))

Termination of therapy, for whatever reason, is difficult. That's why I tried to start a "termination of therapy" social group but there wasn't enough interest in it. But it's part of therapy; unless you go for years and years to one T, it's going to happen at some point.

I've terminated with 4 Ts. The first time was my decision, but it was too sudden. I don't suggest that route; I was miserable and spent most of my time with my second T talking about the first one! I shoultn't have quit; I saw her for almost 4 years but I wasn't finished. We never said good-bye though I went back 2 years later for a couple of sessions which helped.

The next time I terminated therapy because my T moved. I wasn't so attached to her so it wasn't so difficult.

The next T I terminated with had what I thought was the best way to do it! We spent the last month or maybe more, going over past sessions. She had notes and I had my journals. We went over the highlights of each session. It was amazing for me! Some we skimmed over; some I read what I had written. When I left, she allowed me to call her, which eventually turned into email. I didn't abuse it because I felt therapy was "finished" that time.

My most recent T, whom I saw for close to 7 years total, was hard to leave. I spent the last 2 years winding down, though I really didn't want to. We did it gradually, every 2 weeks, every 3, and finally every month. But there was no summary of therapy until the last regular session. After that, it was supposed to be "as needed". It was hard; I still thought I needed her every few months and that didn't seem to be enough.

I should be experienced with all this termination! I realized that most of the time the way I dealt with the big empty feeling was to get back into therapy again. Do you feel like you still need/want more therapy? Then you could do as embracing suggests and find someone with a sliding scale.

Back to how to cope with leaving your T. Will you be able to contact her via email or phone when you're done? That could help make the transition easier. Can you afford, or would she let you come back once in a while? My T said "check in" sessions would be good for me, but the reality is that I still need to be in weekly therapy with someone. But maybe knowing you could see her sometimes would make it easier for you?

I think tapering off slowly is a good idea. I also suggest writing down everything you would regret not telling her before you are done, and making sure you tell her. Or ask her.

It IS a loss, and grieving for your T will be normal. Accepting that it will hurt is probably helpful. Can you ask your T to help with the transition too? Maybe plan to make her something as a goodbye present?

I hope some of this is helpful. Sorry I rambled on so much!

geez, I'm sorry this is happening. I felt devastated when I lost my insurance.

Is it that you have a certain number of hours/sessions left to claim, or do you have unlimited cover until August 1st then none at all? I'm just wondering because tapering off seems like the most sensible thing to do, but how frustrating if you actually have cover for those sessions and want to make the most of it. If you have cover for x hours, at least you can choose how to spread it out...
This probably isn't helping, but I wanted to say I feel for you

What does your T suggest for the termination process? Have you discussed whether you can have any contact after the 'end'?

Ooh, thinking about it, I do have one experience of termination. My previous T announced she was leaving and we had eight sessions left. I made her a present- sewed her something. I planned the design and chose the material and the threads and stitched it over many hours and days and weeks. Looking back, I think that was more for me than for her. With each stitch I was processing our therapy and her leaving. When I was finished, we were finished.

The other thing I did was bought loads of books about termination, because I tend to run to books for everything. I can't remember reading anything particularly useful though...

[WikidPissah]

(((geez))) I'm sorry If your insurance doesn't run out until August, why cant you continue and gradually slow down until then?

[Sannah]

March, April, May, June, July, that's 5 months, 20 sessions. Working on termination would come in July? This leaves 4 months to get to work. Can you start again next year? Can your therapist get an extension?

[geez]

Thank you so much everyone for your posts/responses! I'm just popping on line for a moment to say hi and I'll be back to answer the questions and share my thoughts. Gotta get my little one down for a nap then I can get back on line. Hugs to you all!! and much gratitude!

[geez]

Originally Posted by SophiaG

She still has PC though .

Yes I do and I'm forever thankful and grateful

Originally Posted by rainbow8

(((((geez)))))

Termination of therapy, for whatever reason, is difficult. That's why I tried to start a "termination of therapy" social group but there wasn't enough interest in it.

Do you feel like you still need/want more therapy? Then you could do as embracing suggests and find someone with a sliding scale.

Back to how to cope with leaving your T. Will you be able to contact her via email or phone when you're done? Can you afford, or would she let you come back once in a while? But maybe knowing you could see her sometimes would make it easier for you?

I also suggest writing down everything you would regret not telling her before you are done, and making sure you tell her. Or ask her.

Can you ask your T to help with the transition too? Maybe plan to make her something as a goodbye present?

I would love to join a termination group! I need one!!! I feel like I need more therapy but not that much more. I feel so much stronger than I've ever been in my life. On a personal level I have so much more confidence however some of that is tied to knowing I have a T to see/lean on for support. I've never had that unconditional support and I'm going to truly miss her .

My T said I can see her on an as needed basis or for a "check up" after I stop seeing her. My insurance doesn't run out until August 1st and after that if I need to see her she will let me see her with an agreed upon reduced rate (she would be honest with me if what I could pay wouldn't work for her).

I've started writing down everything I've wanted to ask or tell her and I sent it in an email. At my last appt she asked me if I wanted to talk about it and I said no because I have some things going on with my son and I actually am going to make an appt with my T to see my son.

I like your idea of a good bye present. She likes my writing so I'm going to write something for her telling her how appreciative I am for all that she has done for me and how much she means to me.

Originally Posted by Improving

geez, I'm sorry this is happening. I felt devastated when I lost my insurance.

Is it that you have a certain number of hours/sessions left to claim, or do you have unlimited cover until August 1st then none at all?

What does your T suggest for the termination process? Have you discussed whether you can have any contact after the 'end'?

My T suggests tapering off and I decided that now is a good time to do every other week for now. I have unlimited (up to 60 visits per calender year) and August 1st is the 'I have no insurance any more date'. I may think about scheduling a check up date for 6 months down the road after August 1st? - but on the other side of the coin I think it would be best to not see her again and close the door (btw - I see her around town... we work out at the same gym etc... - we don't talk outside of the office other than maybe a wave - there is some comfort in that knowing she is 'around').

Originally Posted by Eileen2010

why cant you continue and gradually slow down until then?

I'm continuing because I am not done however I figure it's better to tapper off starting now to give myself some time (every other week to start then every third week). The tough part is I'm feeling disconnected with T between visits. Sometimes the time in between appts is really hard and other times it's 'easy' because I know I'm going to get to see her in another couple weeks etc...

Originally Posted by Sannah

March, April, May, June, July, that's 5 months, 20 sessions. Working on termination would come in July? This leaves 4 months to get to work. Can you start again next year? Can your therapist get an extension?

My husband and I need to shop for new insurance as my husband is a consultant now (he was laid off last year so we have been on cobra and that runs out on August 1st).

I don't want to go back to every week as I don't feel like I need to other than wanting to just see her. To be in her presence. I'm not in crisis and I've got my 'head straightened out'. I feel at peace except for a couple of things:
I need resolution with my mother and that relationship.
I need to find other ways of coping with stress and emotions other than food.
Getting past the fear of failure and trying a new adventure in life (perhaps earning a MSW and counseling teens with eating disorders??).

My success so far:
I'm very healthy physically. I've come a long way from a little over a year ago. I have a higher self esteem and I hold my head high and I smile at random strangers.

I am becoming more social and outgoing. I'm less afraid of what others think. I started a run/walk group in my community and I'm motivating others to get out and exercise. I have people who are running with me for my first 5k this month. I'm reaching out to others through my blog and they are finding me inspirational.

I feel like I have the rest of my life ahead of me and I want to start fresh. Almost like a rebirth.

(((((((((((((((( Sophia, Rainbow, Eileen, embracing life, Improving, inbloom, Sannah, and everyone else reading this )))))))))))))))))))))

Thank you so much for being here! - I don't know what I would do without your help and support

[Sannah]

Geez, wow, you have accomplished a lot! I actually did very little therapy. My first therapist I saw 5 times and then off I went to work on my discoveries. After a few years, new issues came up and I went in for a few more appts and then off to work on life. Then a few years later new issues came up and I saw a therapist for a few months and since then (14 yrs ago) I've been working on my issues by myself (with an MSW, though).