Is this a dumb idea?

I feel like I can risk more with my T since my session. I trust her more than ever. So, I have this weird idea of having her say "anatomy words" so I can repeat them after her. I emailed her that suggestion, but I think it's really dumb. Would anyone do such a thing in therapy? It's not such a big deal, but I hate my hang-ups about saying those words. I asked her not so long ago if she had trouble saying the words and she said "no". Well, now that I think of it, the proposed "field trip" to the bathroom is even more weird. (Hasn't happened yet! )

I also wonder what weird things you've worked on in therapy, that you're willing to admit?

I don't think it's a dumb idea at all. I think it sounds like a very good idea!

I have an issue with where I sit in my T's office...she's suggested several times that I try sitting in a different seat, only for a few minutes, then I can go back to the spot I like. It's this whole thing with how close I'm sitting to my T, how much space is around me, and how close I am to the door. I've thought about it every session since she's suggested it, but I haven't managed to yet. Almost did today. I think maybe next time I might be able to attempt the chair closest to her...maybe.

I do that in therapy with my clients. Not weird at all!!! Good for you!

Rainbow, what did your T say?

No it is not a dumb thing to do. I have done that exercise in my own sessions and I carry that over into my sessions with my clients. how else is a victim going to learn its ok to say all the anatomical words if they are not taught how to do so in a safe way in a safe environment.

The field trip not sure what thats about. work has kept me quite busy lately, but if I am hazard a guess you want to show your therapist something? if Im correct on that guess no its not dumb.. I learned how to do and say some things from a planned parenthood therapist helping me with a mirror in the privacy of her office because I was too ashamed and bashful to bring it up with anyone else. the therapist I have now taught me how to do the monthly exams for lumps and all that, while in the privacy of their bathroom.

no matter what the field trip is for as long as you are comfortable with the therapist and you feel safe with them thats all that really matters. do what you need to do in what ever ways you need to.

It sounds like a smart idea!

rain i dont think it is strange at all and i bet it would be really helpfull.it even makes me wonder if it would be helpfull for me to say over again words that bother me also.especially words she is using lately that i hate.

i know for me some words are just so uncomfortable to say and if this is the case for you i bet saying them over again would be hugely helpfull and i dont think T would think it strange at all

not weird...actually i think it's a good idea.

I think it's a great idea.

I really think that when we allow ourselves to trust our T's and, especially, ourselves, we KNOW what we need to heal. T has been willing to walk down some paths with me that just felt like what I needed, even though neither of us knew why, or what the outcome would be, and those have been some of the most healing things we've done in therapy.

That's listening to your internal wisdom, rainbow. Good job

You are SO flippin' brave!

sounds fine to me! I can't say we've done anything 'weird'.....I mean, there is that shield I made that T kept for me to use in session, but that's not weird, just creative......

I don't have time for detailed replies now but I must say I'm amazed at the answers! I thought it was a weird idea. My T may want to do EMDR too because we already did some, on shame issues.

amandalouise--just want to say I'm not a victim, I think it's just that my parents were inhibited and I grew up that way too. The "field trip" is so I could get over panicking about ever being in the stall next to someone I know!

Thanks to everyone.
PTSD, my T already sent her 1 email for the week so I'll find out on Tuesday.

I've done this with T and I don't think it's dumb or weird.

I realised it was necessary when I ended up acting out something that happened wen I was small because I literally didn't have the words. I asked T to give us the words. She gave the grown up words but they just felt too big and scary for how I felt, and not the words I would have been given as a child. So I asked her if we could use the same words that her small daughter can use with her. And that's what we do. I actually particularly like the words because they're not English (they're in T's first language), so they're not laden down with shame or horrible associations. I haven't said them yet. I've written them in a text, and I've asked T during a phonecall to use them to describe what happened to me (she had to repeat herself, as the first time I set the phone down so I didn't have to listen!). But I know they're there for when I'm feeling brave.

My family didn't (doesn't) use words for anything. Not body parts or how they're feeling or what they're thinking or what's just happened. A big part of my work with T is feeling like we have the words, and we're allowed to use them.

I hope you and T can use the words and that it helps

i think it's a great idea. my therapist did the same for me (like put the words to some things that i couldn't) and it really made me feel less weird about the whole thing. it's like she took the shame out of it for me, and almost made it more clinical or something.

the only thing i'll mention about it, is that it was a little odd for me to hear her say the word(s). i remember being like, "whoa, i can't believe you just said that!" and then it (the words in her voice) later echoing in my head. just something i thought i'd mention, as i'd imagine that could be triggering for someone.

78--Yes, I'm already thinking how embarrassed I'm going to be at her saying the words! To tell you the extent of my issue, I squirmed every time she used to say "your body" when we did the breathing and meditation. Now I'm getting used to it. I also didn't like her saying "pee." Once she asked if she could say a word because I was trying to tell her something I had to tell my dr. and I didn't want to say it. I told her No, don't say. So, it's a practical problem for me.

I'm relieved that others have done this! It shows me that anything I think is unique to me, isn't!!! That's why this forum is so helpful!!

I don't think its dumb at ALL-- I think you are INCREDIBLY courageous and its a great idea!!! It makes you SO brave!!!
My therapist has NO problem whatsoever saying all those words--words that I can't even THINK in my head to myself. She also has no problem saying a bunch of the slang words for them. Its just shocking how casual she is. Geesh. So (we have DID-- mult. personalities) and some of the younger inside kids have learned to copy her a little bit-- she would say a word, and they would say it the best they could (awfully embarassing and hard for them-- I don't know WHY we can't do it?) and it really helped a lot to have our T say the word 1st, then to copy her. I guess it takes some of the stigma, or maybe some of the embarassment away? Anyway, I think you have an awesome idea. I hope it works out for you.

Rainbow, I really would like to know how it goes if you are willing to share.

a couple of months ago i was telling t what i my kids call my mom when angry with her (completely inappropriate here) and t said the word.. i totally started experiencing anxiety. i didn't think t had noticed.

a week or two later i mentioned i couldn't type or say certain words, and he said something to the effect that "yeah, you were having some anxiety the last time" AGGGGHHHH!!

so one of my goals is to be able to say those words and not flinch and have a normal conversation with people....


sending safe hugs

Yeah, you are brave! I am getting anxiety thinking about that!
Goodluck, let us know how it goes!! And I think its awesome that you are really thinking about what you need and getting that from therapy.

I can't say the proper words either, T will guess what I'm referring to and say it out-loud and I will nod my head...I'm a grown woman and I still can't refer to anatomy with words. I like your idea, let us know how it goes!

My session is this afternoon. I wasn't anxious about it until now. I don't know how my T will want to approach the words issue. I don't want to "chicken out" so I hope she agrees to work on it in some way. Pocket riders, anyone? You can wear earplugs so you don't have to hear the words!

jumping in if you want me

Thanks, granite! Of course I want you!

coming in!

I am available.

i think im too late to be a pocket rider, sorry....

hope it went well

sending safe hugs