So, now that I've survived the last seven days, I can look back and say... I DID it

During this past week, a friendship ended in a very painful way, my son's little league career came to and end (after 11 very intense years!), I enrolled the same (homeschooled since kindergarten) son in high school, and I had to put my sweet, beloved kitty to sleep. SO many changes and transitions in one week, you know?

And last night I realized, I DID it. I never ran from my feelings. I never used a bad coping skill. I reached out for help from my friends and my H and T, and people reached out to me. I stepped back and did nothing when it felt like doing something would make the situation worse (like with my friend). I was able to show my children healthy ways to deal with big emotions. I kept sleeping, and eating, and exercising. I prayed, and I stayed open to all of the good things that were there in the middle of the hard things (like my 8 year old having an uncontrollable laughing fit when I took him out for ice cream the other night and SPEWING ice cream everywere! lolol).

AND i realized last night, that *this* is what I wanted when I started therapy. To just be able to be in my life. To be able to deal with things that come up. To be able to have and accept good feelings and bad feelings. To be able to see that the good and the bad can be all mixed in there together and it's okay. To be able to have an underlying sense of "okayness" even when life is sad or scary.

I don't know if i will stay in this place. But I've had this taste of it, and I know it's what I want, and I know it's possible for me, and that is the most amazing thing. 4 years ago, this week would never have gone this way.

Therapy really. does. work.

[WePow]

(((((((Tree)))))))) You DID IT!!! You are doing it!
I am so happy to hear that you are able to see the benifits of your hard work and therapy in your life !!!! That is just so awesome!!! And I bet your T is beyond thrilled as well !!!!

[granite1]

wow tree what great thoughts and insight to share.thanks.you did it

[rainbow_rose]

That is SO awesome, treehouse! I love moments like that, when you realize you did good.

[ECHOES]

Originally Posted by treehouse

So, now that I've survived the last seven days, I can look back and say... I DID it

During this past week, a friendship ended in a very painful way, my son's little league career came to and end (after 11 very intense years!), I enrolled the same (homeschooled since kindergarten) son in high school, and I had to put my sweet, beloved kitty to sleep. SO many changes and transitions in one week, you know?

And last night I realized, I DID it. I never ran from my feelings. I never used a bad coping skill. I reached out for help from my friends and my H and T, and people reached out to me. I stepped back and did nothing when it felt like doing something would make the situation worse (like with my friend). I was able to show my children healthy ways to deal with big emotions. I kept sleeping, and eating, and exercising. I prayed, and I stayed open to all of the good things that were there in the middle of the hard things (like my 8 year old having an uncontrollable laughing fit when I took him out for ice cream the other night and SPEWING ice cream everywere! lolol).

AND i realized last night, that *this* is what I wanted when I started therapy. To just be able to be in my life. To be able to deal with things that come up. To be able to have and accept good feelings and bad feelings. To be able to see that the good and the bad can be all mixed in there together and it's okay. To be able to have an underlying sense of "okayness" even when life is sad or scary.

I don't know if i will stay in this place. But I've had this taste of it, and I know it's what I want, and I know it's possible for me, and that is the most amazing thing. 4 years ago, this week would never have gone this way.

Therapy really. does. work.

This is just beautiful, tree !

I'm sorry so many stressful and emotional things were happening at once, but what an opportunity it presented to you to discover more about yourself, about your personal growth, your strengths.
I especially admire the ability to 'do nothing' when it feelings are intense and it feels like we need to 'do Something'. Sounds funny that learning to do 'nothing' is quite an accomplishment, but it really is.

I'm sorry about your friendship ending.
I'm so glad that you are on this side of all of the recent chaos now.

[Hope-Full]

Tree, thank you so much for sharing your little victories with us... it gives me such hope. (and honestly, I don't think this is a "little" victory - a pretty big one, if you ask me!)

Sorry to hear about the bumps in the road this week, but it doesn't sound like it derailed your journey at all!

Originally Posted by treehouse

So, now that I've survived the last seven days, I can look back and say... I DID it

I realized last night, that *this* is what I wanted when I started therapy. To just be able to be in my life. To be able to deal with things that come up. To be able to have and accept good feelings and bad feelings. To be able to see that the good and the bad can be all mixed in there together and it's okay. To be able to have an underlying sense of "okayness" even when life is sad or scary.

I don't know if i will stay in this place. But I've had this taste of it, and I know it's what I want, and I know it's possible for me, and that is the most amazing thing. 4 years ago, this week would never have gone this way.

Therapy really. does. work.

I LOVE reading posts like this! Progress and success in therapy. It makes others see that they, too, can overcome their issues and be a much healthier and happier person.

I understand the not knowing how long you will stay in this 'place', but like you said, once you have tasted it, it makes you want it even more. You will try harder to stay in it or get back to it should you fall away temporarily.

Thanks for sharing this. You made my day!

[wintergirl]

This brought me hope as well! I love how you were able to cope with all those huge changes (and even enjoy the spewing ice cream - I have a little boy who does that, too!).

Congrats, and I'm sure there are many great things to come for you!

I am sorry for such an intense week (((hugs)))

Yes - therapy really does work. But it also really, really works so well for you this week because YOU made great changes, choices, and uses appropriate self care. You were able to take the tools T has given you in the office, and apply them to your life. Therapy works, because you worked through it.

[lastyearisblank]

Yay that is awesome and so positive that you were able to field such a difficult week with good coping skills. There is so much hope and just delight in your message. Thank you much for sharing that!!!

[karebear1]

This was the best post I've read in a long time tree! Good for you!!!

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by treehouse

To be able to have an underlying sense of "okayness" even when life is sad or scary.

YES! Do other people HAVE that and just take it for granted or what? Because I've never heard anyone say it explicitly, and have tried to explain it to T, that I want a BASELINE of happiness, not DREAD. Okayness, I like that.

[googley]

((((((((((((Tree)))))))))))

That is so awesome. This post just made my day.



You have worked so hard and come so far.

[Butterflies Are Free]

Congratulations on how well you handled everything and just allowed yourself to feel your emotions - I am very proud of you!

[skysblue]

It's great to hear a testimonial from someone who has come out on the other side. Thanks for sharing.

Originally Posted by hankster

YES! Do other people HAVE that and just take it for granted or what? Because I've never heard anyone say it explicitly, and have tried to explain it to T, that I want a BASELINE of happiness, not DREAD. Okayness, I like that.

I think I've realized that maybe a baseline of "happiness" is unrealistic (for me, anyhow). Because sometimes I will be happy, sometimes I will be sad, sometimes I will be angry.

I think for me, a baseline of "okayness" feels right. Or maybe "contentment", or "serenity".

And I *do* wonder if other people have that? I know that for me, my baseline has always been fear (and a big big pile of negative thoughts/feelings about myself). "Okayness" is huge for me And a total, total, total gift.

[elliemay]

Freud considered "ordinary human unhappiness" to be the best possible outcome for psychotherapy.

He was not always wrong.

Originally Posted by elliemay

Freud considered "ordinary human unhappiness" to be the best possible outcome for psychotherapy.

He was not always wrong.

I'm hoping to end up just a step up from that. Ordinary human okayness would work for me

[rainbow_rose]

I really like that word, treehouse. 'okayness'.

[sunrise]

Treehouse, I loved reading about your success this week in handling everything you had to do. Way to go! I hope you can share these thoughts with your T.

Originally Posted by treehouse

I stayed open to all of the good things that were there in the middle of the hard things

My T told me something like that recently--to look for the Blessings amidst all that is happening.

[siljie]

This is so inspirational. THANK YOU for posting, honestly. It gives me a flicker of hope, that maybe I too will slowly be able to begin to heal and live life normally - or at least, handle things in a normal, healthy way. Sorry for what you've had to deal with, but fantastic job handling it.

[Sannah]

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have made so much progress!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you and you deserve all of it and more!!