[Astridetal]

I have dissociative identity disorder, which requires pretty specialized therapy. Currently I get therapy with a non-specialized therapist who is trying to educate herself, but the therapy is mostly trying to stuff symptoms rather than learn to deal with them. Now in November I'll move to a new place, and I and my therapist agree that's a good time to switch to a DID specialist. I will move to an institution (I live in an institution now too), which gets paid fro through mandatory insurance in my country. Now the institution gets paid for everything: nursing or support staff, day activities, therapy, etc. If they can't offer the care that I require, they're supposed to hire someone externallly and pay that person. So I told them last month that I'd found a DID therapist, but they bluntly told me they wouldn't be paying for that and that I had to deal with counseling from their own psychologist, who says she has knoweldge of trauma just because she is a psychologist. She (new institution psychologist) went on to say that since I'll have to get used to living in the new place anyway, it's best not to do treatment so even if they did have a specialist or were willing ot pay for one, it would not be best for me. I said I can see why we shouldn't start DID therapy right away, but in the long term I do need it. "You have your life a head of you," she said. Now I am 25 indeed, but I will likely live at that institution for five to ten years if not longer (it's a place wher eyou can essnetially stay for life, but I want to eventually live wiht my husband when he's finished college and I'm ready for more independence). It's not like I can wait that long to get specialized treamtnet for my DID. So I'm really not sure I want to go to that new institution at all. Besides, chances are they won't pay fo rmy blindness-related help (I am blind too), which they have to get externally, too. I am supposed to go to that place because it specializes in autism, but the psychologist warned me that it's quite unquiet and the patients are pretty severely affected there. I can be severe too depending on which of my DID parts is out, but generally I'm manageable due to meds. Not sure what I want from you folks. Just wanting to get this off my chest I guess.

[Omers]

I am so sorry. I too struggle with DID and autism with some parts being more autistic than others. There is no one out there that knows how to work with both aspects of us. I can imagine being blind as well. I commend you on all that you have already accomplished.
Keep up being such a wonderful advocate for yourself! NO ONE understands what you need more than you do!!!

[learning1]

Astridetal, I'm glad to read you can use this website as a blind person. It seems like a lot of work for you having to advocate for all the services at various institutions. You'll make it better for the next person... which doesn't make it fun I don't suppose. I read another post of yours about the institutions but I dont' rememeber if you had a choice. I think you do. right?

I hate how institutions say that they won't provide services that would cost money and then lie and make up excuses about why it's in your best interest. I think some people at the institutions believe the lies- maybe they arent' smart enough to imagine anything different. But it's hard to imagine the decision maker has no awareness that they are refusing because it would cost money. I don't know how people can do the unethical things they do sometimes. I don't suppose this rant is helping you though.

I hope u keep posting

[Astridetal]

Thank you omers and learning1 for your support. I know I'll make it easier to access services for the next one. I had that happen before at a place I had to leave and then ended up in hospital. Now that place keeps patients who are "difficult" longer because they know it's bad for their reputation if people get hospitalized after being kicked out. But really I d on't want to pave the way for others. I want to get the care I need.