[bluemountains]

I have only emailed my t with general questions in the past, and she has always emailed me back pretty quickly. After yesterday's session, a very rough one for me, I emailed some thoughts and questions about the session, but I have not yet received a return email! I feel awful about this because this is the only email that I have ever sent that has been of a personal nature about a session. What is the normal waiting time for you when you have emailed your t? Or have any of you ever gone without a reply, and how did you handle this?

Thanks,

bluemountains

My T says no e-mails or texts. So, I cannot help you there. I can only say that I'm sorry she hasn't replied.

[stopdog]

Did you ask for a reply? If not, she may be waiting until your next appointment to talk about it.

[3velniai]

It depends on what email rules does your T have. Have you talked with her about it? There are all kinds of Ts, some allow email only for scheduling, others require you to ask for a reply to get one and so on.

On the other hand, a more personal email requires more thinking before sending a reply and therefore more time. My T replies to emails within 1-7 days. Sometimes I wait for 5 days and get something like "let's talk about it in session". Ts are also human, sometimes they are too busy, not in a mood or smth else, and therefore we have to wait. And it sucks. But what can you do except wait...

Be sure you specifically asked for a reply. Otherwise, you may not get one. Things happen sometimes to delay a response, but if you haven't heard back by this evening, certainly send another.

[bluemountains]

I reread my email, and I asked questions although I didn't ask specifically ask for a reply. If I don't get a reply, I know I will not be brave enough to send another email. I can't help it, I am just not able to do this. I am so insecure it is unbelievable. It only took me 30 years to go back to therapy after my first couple of attempts, so you can imagine how I feel about communication-it's tough!

[pbutton]

I generally have to say "please respond" to get T to write back to me. It's annoying. I don't email often because it causes me the same amount of angst as whatever was originally bothering me. I feel your pain.

[roads]

I'm sorry. I know it's hard.
Just don't give up. Don't think never, bluemountains.
Maybe you can do it in an hour. You'll be a somewhat changed person then!
Be good to yourself.

"A man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a heaven for?"
--Robert Browning, poet, & lover to Elizabeth Barrett

[bluemountains]

I finally got a reply! This restores my faith in my t. As she explained, she doesn't work on Thursdays, so she was just getting to her emails today. I was thrown off by those who replied that their t doesn't answer emails. I occasionally need to follow up or get questions answered with doctors, so I expect the same service with my t. I am sorry that this is not the case with all t's.

Emails can be very difficult, particularly if you have emailed something important and are waiting for a reply. I always find my t to be rather cold and clinical in her replies, which often causes more harm than good. I am glad you finally got a reply.

[bluemountains]

I agree that actual therapy should not be given through emails. I wouldn't expect the t to dispense any advice, although I do think it is okay for me as a client/patient to express my opinions, thoughts, and feelings if I am comfortable doing so.(I'm not!) Because our t's are such an important part of our lives as we heal, though, I do think that they should acknowledge our contact, whether it be a return email or a phone call. My t is also very clinical in her responses and she is also this way during our sessions. I prefer this because I am already in a very vulnerable state, and I don't want the t to become too much a part of my emotions, as was the case when I needed a response to the email. My lesson learned is to try to avoid creating more vulnerability because I am already so insecure that the feeling of rejection immediately takes over. As a matter of fact, I now realize that I need to bring all of these feelings up in my next session because I need some coping strategies.

[RiverX]

Originally Posted by kindergirl

Emails can be very difficult, particularly if you have emailed something important and are waiting for a reply. I always find my t to be rather cold and clinical in her replies, which often causes more harm than good. I am glad you finally got a reply.

Its an excrutiating one. Glad you're off the anxiety hook.

I like this too:

It's annoying. I don't email often because it causes me the same amount of angst as whatever was originally bothering me.

[RiverX]

Originally Posted by kindergirl

Emails can be very difficult, particularly if you have emailed something important and are waiting for a reply. I always find my t to be rather cold and clinical in her replies, which often causes more harm than good. I am glad you finally got a reply.

Its an excrutiating one. Glad you're off the anxiety hook.

I like this too:

It's annoying. I don't email often because it causes me the same amount of angst as whatever was originally bothering me.