Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Jan 11, 2012, 06:53 AM
Anonymous32795
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Lately there's been this option in my head. Normally I have positive fantasys around T where I am omnipotent and then there's the negative fantasy where she doesn't care BUT as I say this other option has crept into this thinking but having it or allowing it is akin to lifting a heavy weight with ones little finger only, and its telling myself that amongst all these thoughts there Is T and everything I can trust about her is there too, but I can't hold that thought foe too long, I can actually witness my own thinking fighting to get back to the idolised and the negative thinking and I asked myself why wouldn't I want this new real option? And its fear! Real fear to admit to myself that T is there, isn't going to reject me. Its like having a child locked in the attic running across the bare boards and I'm sitting underneath powerless to stop her pounding but now someones pointed out where the key is to the attic but to afraid to fully commit to dealing with her.
Hugs from:
Anonymous32732, rainbow8

advertisement
  #2  
Old Jan 11, 2012, 12:12 PM
Chopin99's Avatar
Chopin99 Chopin99 is offline
Elder
 
Member Since: Dec 2009
Location: Southeastern US
Posts: 5,221
I love your allegory about the child in the attic! It is so representative of your feelings, which I relate to! Thanks for sharing.
__________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. - Henry David Thoreau
  #3  
Old Jan 11, 2012, 12:40 PM
Perna's Avatar
Perna Perna is offline
Pandita-in-training
 
Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
Cat's out of the bag now you know it is there and it will get bigger. Sounds like great insight, earthmamma!
__________________
"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
  #4  
Old Jan 11, 2012, 12:44 PM
BashfulBear's Avatar
BashfulBear BashfulBear is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2011
Location: Balancing (precariously) on the high-wire without a safety net.
Posts: 251
Wow! :O Thanks for sharing this - I can really relate, so much! I don't know how I feel about that fact though.. so conflicted.
__________________

'I also hate people who ask cheerfully how you are when they know you're feeling like hell and expect you to say 'Fine.'' - Sylvia Plath

The real relationship.

  #5  
Old Jan 12, 2012, 05:43 AM
Anonymous32795
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by BashfulBear View Post
so conflicted.
yup me too!
  #6  
Old Jan 12, 2012, 10:39 AM
Sannah's Avatar
Sannah Sannah is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,179
Quote:
Originally Posted by earthmamma View Post
Real fear to admit to myself that T is there, isn't going to reject me.
Good work!! It is scary to take a chance and dip your toe in the water?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........

I'm an ISFJ
Reply
Views: 423

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:42 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.