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#1
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So I went on a walk around the city with my T yesterday, and we stopped and did a errand at his vet and picked up his kitties food. While we were there I just looked up at him and stayed quiet. I felt like a little kid with my dad. It was so comforting and safe, it felt good. I didnt have my needs met as a kid. I raised myself. I don't know if I should tell him how it made me feel? I want to talk to him about it, but I'm afraid he won't take me on any more errands if I tell him about it. So should I tell him guys? I'm embarrassed.
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![]() growlycat, likelife
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#2
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It sounds like it was a really warm moment that you shared with your T. I imagine he'd be glad to hear about it.
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![]() lostmyway21
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#3
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This sounds like a victory that you have had this experience and even more...realize how much it means!
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![]() lostmyway21
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#4
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#5
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Thanks guys I'm just scared he will take away the walks if I tell him.
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#6
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If you decide to speak to him about it Lost, pre-empt telling him this with the thought that you want to tell him something, but if you do, you're afraid he may take that thing that meant so much to you away from you. It will help you and him both. Hugs Lost.
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![]() lostmyway21, pbutton
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#7
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Ahhh omg I told him. Please don't take away my walks.
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#8
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My T talks about "the joys of the ordinary". Something she felt I didn't value enough.
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
![]() Rosie23
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#9
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I would love a opportunity to do something normal with T. Just to be with her outside that room. I posted once about doing the dishes with her. That's one of my most cherished memories. T's office opens off her laundry, so the laundry is one of the places in her house where I'm allowed to be. When I saw your post I had a fantasy about folding towels with her.
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
![]() growlycat, lostmyway21
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![]() FourRedheads
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#10
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#11
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I love that your T went for a walk with you, what a lovely idea! I don't think you should be embarrassed about telling him how it made you feel, I think he'll be glad how much you appreciate it.
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![]() lostmyway21
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#12
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Ok guys this is what I sent him: (good or no good? I wish my keyboard had a take back button I'd be smashing it right now.
![]() Okay I am a little worried about sending this email for two reasons. One is because it is highly embarrassing, and two is because I am afraid that you will take going on walks away from me. Here is goes: I remember when I first started seeing you and we talked about my childhood you said it wasn't normal. I mean it was always normal to me because it's all I never knew. The more I think about it though, the more I realize it wasn't. I never really got any of my needs met. I was always left on my own to figure it own for myself. I was never dependent on anyone else, even when I wanted to or needed to be. I often wonder if it is too late to learn how to fulfill those needs that weren't met? Anyway, when we went on the walk, and we stopped at the vet to pick up you kitties food, something pretty amazing connections were being made. When I was leaning on the counter looking up at you, I felt like a little kid. I felt like all my little kid needs were being met. I felt comforted, and so safe by your side, it felt good. I felt like our connection could not be touched. I realized right then and there that even though you wouldn't hug me, that you make up for it in other ways. That being in that moment right there, made me feel a million times better than a hug ever could. It calmed down all my aggressive and agitated feelings, and just put me at a calm, that I haven't felt in so long. I felt like it was important that I shared this with you. *But at the same time I am really scared by doing that you will take away our walks. I hope you don't. Will you? It was super helpful and they mean a lot to me now. |
![]() Anonymous33425, growlycat, karebear1, likelife, Velvet Cactus
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![]() growlycat, karebear1
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#13
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I think your email is fantastic! You expressed yourself so clearly, and your feelings were really apparent. You also asked really directly about whether he would take away walks, which is a great way to ask for reassurance. Bravo!
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![]() lostmyway21
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#14
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I love getting into this mode with T! This is what our hugs are about, this is the mindset I try to get into a lot of the time - because there is someone lost way back in there somewhere, who sneaks out and embarrasses me at very wrong times, so it is a priority to get her taken care of. And relating to her like this does seem to be working. You described it here very very well. It's kind of like pretend with a purpose.
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![]() childofyen, lostmyway21
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#15
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So I got really nervous and I emailed him again after I sent it, and asked him to let me know if things were okay. And he said everything was and I didnt say anything wrong and I can still go on walks. Yay!
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![]() Anonymous33425
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![]() CantExplain, karebear1
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#16
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That is wonderful Lost! He's a good T- huh???
Try and hold this lovely , warm feeling if you can. |
![]() lostmyway21
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#17
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#18
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We love to do outside stuff with our t
I am glad you got to do that Thats so nice I dont think he gonna take it away |
![]() lostmyway21
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#19
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That's OK. Triggers are everywhere and mostly accidental.
You helped me see my feelings more clearly. Now I can take it back to T.
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
![]() growlycat, lostmyway21
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#20
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Miss my walks with the T but they haven't gone away forever. We would stop and buy bottled water and your story reminded me of that same feeling so thank you!
Great email, I think T's don't always get feedback when they are doing something right!!! |
![]() lostmyway21
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#21
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Your T sounds great and apparently exactly what you need! Walk your face off with T... As long as it works!
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![]() lostmyway21
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#22
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