I sort of bolted from therapy over 2 months ago... thought at the time that I had got all I could out of it...it was too hard...too much money and just ended it...

After about 3 weeks I realized it was a mistake...realized I was running away from dealing with the hard stuff... then I couldn't decide if I wanted to continue with my current T and even went to try out a new T....
I had one meeting with my old T and we decided that we could work together again...and discussed what I needed and what he thought would make therapy work better for us... I've had to wait almost a month to get into his schedule...

So tonight is the first real session in 2 months and I'm feeling a little weird and anxious about it...

The only "good" thing is that I have something really upsetting going on in my RL with my H so atleast I know what I need to talk about tonight...

any support? things to keep in mind?

[WikidPissah]

keep in mind that you might not simply fall back into the rhythm of things. It's been a few mos, it might feel awkward and uncomfortable, but that's normal.

[InTherapy]

I have never been in that position, but I just wanted to say good for you for going back! I think in the end, for most people, seeing a therapist will make them feel better, faster.

[granite1]

jumping in the pocket.take things slow ok

[2kidsandadog]

Stay focused on the issue at hand! Are you going by yourself?

It will be ok! I've been to many a counseling session, alone and with H. You have control of WHAT you discuss and how far deep you want to go!

Glad you decided that you made the mistake of dropping it too soon.

Good Luck!!

[healed84]

I hope your session goes well for you tonight!! GL!

[lostmyway21]

I'll come along if you need pocket riders! Good luck tonight!

Good for you Hope your session goes well!

Hope the session goes well tonight! I'm glad you've decided to tackle the hard stuff, because that's where the big payoffs are and the healing.

[taylor43]

Good for you going back, i took a year off and knew it was a mistake. Do take it slow, it was hard at first still is after 5 months, it will get easier in time.

glad youre going back-we will be thinking of you

[Kacey2]

Hey Readytostop, how did it go? I hope it went well. Please post and let us know. I've been thinking about you today.

[Chopin99]

I'm glad you decided to go back! Please let us know how it goes.

Update: My first session back after a break went well. We didn't get to talk about goals or trust or anything that I wanted to work at...

I was sort of in an emotional crisis because I had not been dealing with my feelings about my H's "addiction" and it sort of all came to a head this week and so that is all we talked about... but having that to deal with made it so much easier to move past any ackwardness...

Next week I want up to talk about goals and trust and all the stuff we said we would.........because honestly spending so much time talking about my husband who I am so angy at seems like a waste of my time....

[Kacey2]

Originally Posted by Readytostop

Update: My first session back after a break went well. We didn't get to talk about goals or trust or anything that I wanted to work at...

I was sort of in an emotional crisis because I had not been dealing with my feelings about my H's "addiction" and it sort of all came to a head this week and so that is all we talked about... but having that to deal with made it so much easier to move past any ackwardness...

Next week I want up to talk about goals and trust and all the stuff we said we would.........because honestly spending so much time talking about my husband who I am so angy at seems like a waste of my time....

Sounds like you jumped right in RTS! But when I was reading "Dear T" did you say you were angry at him? I am confused?!?

Hi Kacey2,

I was really angry at my husband. My husband is addicted to porn and he is in therapy for that... and he "fell off the wagon"... and even though I found out last year...(he's kept it a secret for 20 years and let me think that lots of problems in our marriage were my fault when in truth they were due to his addiction)... I've never dealt with it all...but all this anger is leaking out now...

My t. was trying tobe helpful... but he was saying something that must have triggered my anger cause I said "yeah right... yada...yada..yada:"... at this point I don't even know what he said ... I think after I said that ...I think he said "its good to see you getting angry".. but I can't be sure if that was after I said that or in response to something else...

When I think of saying that to t is seems rather childish...like sticking my fingers in my ears and saying screaming so i couldn't hear what someone else was saying...

[Kacey2]

Actually that image makes me laugh but then again I am childish myself! I just thought it was impressive that the two of you kind of easily fell into a comfortable exchange with out pretenses. I like it!

Sorry to hear about your troubles with hubby's addiction. I can only imagine how wearing that would be on a marriage. Of course, you would be angry! How could it be anything else? It makes complete sense and even though you may have felt you were wasting your time talking all about someone you were po-ed at it probably was what you needed to do. It seems as if you were comfortable with t enough to know that you could wait until next session to follow up with housekeeping therapy stuff.

I don't know.....when I get the mental image of you and your t in session it makes me smile. I could be off by a mile but..........