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  #1  
Old May 05, 2012, 03:38 PM
anonymous112713
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Trigger for depression, drugs, alcohol, divorce, si......







I have been emailing T back and forth all morning...as many know i am a fake weed abuser. I gave it up monday...been clean for 5 days, but i back slid today out of reactionary anger ... My partner has left to her mothers and says its over. I am in a very dark place, one all to familiar... I just need a word of encouragement. Anyone. T is still emailing me even talked on the phone for like 30 minutes...all alone, for 2 days....alcohol, drugs sadness , lead me to attempt suicide... Im trying to remain positive.
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  #2  
Old May 05, 2012, 03:41 PM
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roads roads is offline
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Glad you're posting. Drugs make bad feelings worse, so don't believe any feelings now.
If it feels safe to be posting here, just.keep.posting.
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roads & Charlie
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  #3  
Old May 05, 2012, 03:45 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LolaCabanna View Post
My partner has left to her mothers and says its over. I am in a very dark place, one all to familiar... I just need a word of encouragement. Anyone. T is still emailing me even talked on the phone for like 30 minutes...all alone, for 2 days....alcohol, drugs sadness , lead me to attempt suicide... Im trying to remain positive.
You will love again.
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  #4  
Old May 05, 2012, 03:48 PM
Anonymous33425
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Sounds like things are really rough at the moment.. Hang in there, you'll find your way again. Sounds like your T is being real supportive at least, I'm glad. Keep posting here too x
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  #5  
Old May 05, 2012, 03:57 PM
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rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
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we're here.... listening.... please keep posting
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Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~

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  #6  
Old May 05, 2012, 03:58 PM
anonymous112713
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Shes going to tell the children , i asked her to wait til monday before she takes this away from me and she said i gave it up.
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  #7  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:02 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LolaCabanna View Post
Shes going to tell the children , i asked her to wait til monday before she takes this away from me and she said i gave it up.
Oh Lola, I'm so sorry!

I'm going to give you the maximum hugs allowed by law.



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Add that to your tattoo, Baby!
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  #8  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:03 PM
Anonymous32517
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Quote:
Shes going to tell the children , i asked her to wait til monday before she takes this away from me and she said i gave it up.
I'm so, so sorry.

Keep posting, Lola. We're here.
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  #9  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:08 PM
Anonymous43209
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(((((((lola)))))) we are here for you,we care♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
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  #10  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:11 PM
anonymous112713
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I have never cried so hard in my life... It just keeps coming
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  #11  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:16 PM
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Towanda Towanda is offline
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LC I am so sorry you are in so much pain. Keep posting...we are all here for you
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Linda
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  #12  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:20 PM
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SpiritRunner SpiritRunner is offline
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I am so sorry, so sorry. For the comfort that it may be, know that you are loved here and we know you to be a valuable worthwhile person who deserves comfort and love.
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  #13  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:32 PM
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roads roads is offline
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I'm so sorry. Just stay with us, okay? I can only imagine how hurt you are, but you will get through this.

Keep posting, please stay connected here.
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roads & Charlie
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  #14  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:53 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LolaCabanna View Post
I have never cried so hard in my life... It just keeps coming
Crying is the right thing to do.
__________________
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Add that to your tattoo, Baby!
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  #15  
Old May 05, 2012, 04:59 PM
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granite1 granite1 is offline
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im a bit late reading this lola i am sorry.you are so loved here and you WILL love again also. i also think crying is the best thing to do.
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BEHAVIORS ARE EASY WORDS ARE NOT

Dx, HUMAN
Rx, no medication for that
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Thanks for this!
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  #16  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:17 PM
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bluemountains bluemountains is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2011
Location: USA
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((((Lola))))
I am so sorry for your pain. I, too, am here with your pc friends to listen. You have lots of us online who look forward to your posts and care for you.
Bluemountains
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  #17  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:20 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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It is very hard to break up. Take care of yourself.
  #18  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:25 PM
anonymous112713
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My emotions are all over the map... I had to tell the oldest she called and i was crying... And mother in law grilled me for an hour.im all alone til sunday night.... Ugggg
  #19  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:35 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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Can you call some friends to be with you?
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  #20  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:40 PM
anonymous112713
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
Can you call some friends to be with you?
My only two friends within hundreds of miles, are several hours away at a party, its cinco de mayo.. We are in Texas. I dont want to bother T because he has a prego wife and a little one and like 10 things to dictate. He said i could email... But i just dont want him to commit me or something..
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  #21  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:52 PM
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WePow WePow is offline
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Location: Everywhere and Nowhere
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Stay on PC and go into support chat when you need it. You may be lonely right now, but you are not alone. We on PC are here for you. We care. And you can make it through this pain. You can do it. And call T again if you need to do so. T is there for you and cares deeply for you. Let yourself rest right now inside. You have made it this far and you will make it through this.
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  #22  
Old May 05, 2012, 05:59 PM
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WikidPissah WikidPissah is offline
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((((Lola)))) Keep posting, we are here for you, you are worth it and things can and will get better.
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never mind...
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  #23  
Old May 05, 2012, 06:07 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LolaCabanna View Post
My emotions are all over the map... I had to tell the oldest she called and i was crying... And mother in law grilled me for an hour.im all alone til sunday night.... Ugggg
MIL was upset about the break-up?
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Add that to your tattoo, Baby!
  #24  
Old May 05, 2012, 06:20 PM
Anonymous32729
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So sorry Lola keep posting here. We care about you.
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  #25  
Old May 05, 2012, 06:23 PM
anonymous112713
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CantExplain View Post
MIL was upset about the break-up?
Yes, i think she loves me more then her own daughter, she calls me the daughter by choice. She planned on attacking my partner upon arrival. I advised MIl to just listen to her., just listen and then she can cheer on my behalf later. MIL works at a home for addicts, a live in treatment facility.
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Thanks for this!
CantExplain
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