[summeryoga]

Hope this is the right place to post this question ...

My therapist and I have been working together for about three months, and she would like me to try EMDR this Friday. I've read about what it is and how it works, but I'm a little anxious.

I'm curious to hear what other people's experiences with it have been like, and if it has been helpful or not.

Thanks a ton if you can share any of that with me - I'm sure it would help ease this subtle anxiety a bit.

[rainbow8]

Hi, summeryoga. I like your name. Do you only do yoga in the summer? My T recommended yoga to me and it really helps to quiet my mind. I could use some now, in fact. Got to breathe.

EMDR. You can do a search on this forum because there have been some threads about it recently. I have a couple of questions for you. Has your T taken the training in EMDR that is required for certification? That's important. Also, has she prepared you for it by finding a "safe place"? That's important too. Also, there are various methods for the bilateral stimulation. I couldn't follow my T's fingers so I hold buzzers and wear headphones, and I keep my eyes closed.

Did you read the new book by Francine Shapiro, Getting Past Your Past? It's really good. She's the one who "invented" EMDR.

People respond differently to EMDR so it probably won't help to hear what individuals say. I fought doing EMDR for a long time because I thought it was weird and I liked IFS, the method my T used to like. But she says EMDR changes your brain and it's more effective so I've gotten used to it. I don't have major trauma to process; I've read and heard that you can feel better in just a couple of EMDR sessions if you do. For some reason, my feeling stuck with things and the processing of memories goes much slower but I still get something out of the process. I now believe it really does work and it's nothing to be afraid of.

My T always says that there is no right or wrong way to do EMDR. She says my brain will go where it needs to go. I've found that's true. Just relax and try not to worry about the process. If it gets to be too traumatic you can stop at any time. That doesn't happen to me but I know it can.

I wish you good luck with it and please post how it goes. I think the most important aspect is trust in your T to be competent and know how to do EMDR with you.

[summeryoga]

Rainbow, thanks for the perspectives.

Welllll .... I do Yoga all year round, except when I'm giving in to self-sabotage. I could use Yoga now, too. I need some quiet time to stretch and breathe, for sure. Whether I give that to myself or not is a whole nother question.

I do trust my T; she is certified and experienced, and she's been working with me on coping skills in relation to my traumas and triggers. I'll look into that book ... thanks for the title.

Your words are encouraging, so thanks.

[Kacey2]

Hi Summeryoga,
I had a psychiatrist that wanted to do EMDR with me and my t (who works with this pdoc) strongly disagreed. He told me that it would blow my mind right up. I am not trying to scare you. I guess I am just wondering if you and your t both know the extent of the trauma you are trying to process and if it is one item or many? Did she prepare you for any of the possible negative side effects? Have you went over and mastered some coping skills or distress tolerance? I thought it may be a quick fix for me and fast relief but my t held firm and I am glad he did. Please be careful. I am interested to know what you decide and if it works. Good luck! KC

[summeryoga]

Originally Posted by Kacey2

Hi Summeryoga,
I had a psychiatrist that wanted to do EMDR with me and my t (who works with this pdoc) strongly disagreed. He told me that it would blow my mind right up. I am not trying to scare you. I guess I am just wondering if you and your t both know the extent of the trauma you are trying to process and if it is one item or many? Did she prepare you for any of the possible negative side effects? Have you went over and mastered some coping skills or distress tolerance? I thought it may be a quick fix for me and fast relief but my t held firm and I am glad he did. Please be careful. I am interested to know what you decide and if it works. Good luck! KC

Yup, she has prepared me with coping skills/distress tolerance. I think I'm a bit of an anomaly because we're using it not for PTSD as most people, but for getting to the bottom of habitual harmful beliefs and behaviors brought on by an overall neglectful childhood. My gut tells me to do it, because I trust her and I do think she's prepared me well. I guess my fear is that we may rip the bandaid off something so painful that I'll end up depressed. I will update you after Friday.

Thanks

I'm glad you asked this question, and I'm glad you've gotten the responses you have, but I'm surprised there aren't more EMDRers here. I'm not one, myself, but I came to look at this thread because I've been thinking about the possibility of EMDR, too. I'm both curious and frightened.

What are the memories like that come out? Does it even bring out memories, exactly? Are they flashbacks? Will we re-experience the the trauma? Can it happen on a sensory level, too?

I've had a flashback before. It was definitely one of the most horrifying experiences of my life, but afterwards I felt... so free. So whole. So released and complete, I would do it again if I could. Walls of numbness rose again in a matter of time, and that feeling of wholeness melted away.
Preceding the flashback, I had no idea what was coming, but the whole day I felt odd; sick, loopy, frightened for no apparent reason. It was a unique, unpleasant cocktail of emotional and and physical sensation, like a prodrome. And now that I've felt it, it's unmistakable for anything else.

And now, years later, I'm feeling it again, the "prodrome." There's something in there that wants to come out. But it just won't. It's stuck or something. It's hovering behind my head, just out of sight. I've felt so numb and dead inside for so long, and I really believe that once the memories come out I can start to be whole again.

I wonder if EMDR could help that process along? I don't know what the memory is going to be (though I might know what "category" it falls under), so I wouldn't know what to focus on while the session is going. But you said your T wants you to use EMDR for more of a generalized recovery? I wonder how that will work if you don't have a specific trauma-related image to focus on? Would you mind sharing how exactly your T says the process will go in a case in which there isn't something particular on which to be focused?

[Brave Heart]

I am glad that you have chosen a therapist who uses EMDR and you are willing to experience it. EMDR is about processing previously unprocessed memories.
If you want to know more about it, please read Dr. hapiro's new book Getting Past Your Past. I believe it will allay your worries about it.

[summeryoga]

My therapist postponed EMDR until May 9th because my dog died, and I was mourning his death. So, I'll let you all know how it goes on the 9th.

[struggling2]

Originally Posted by cometcatcher

What are the memories like that come out? Does it even bring out memories, exactly? Are they flashbacks? Will we re-experience the the trauma? Can it happen on a sensory level, too?

i do EMDR once a week with a 2nd therapist. i was really skeptical of it first and the idea of it still kinda weirds me out. ive done it probably 7-9 times so far. i kept waiting for some huge memory or flashback to smack me in the face in the middle of it......but it hasnt happened. nothing like that has. maybe im not doing it right? ive read alot about it and people who say they felt instant relief or it helped right away. i dont notice anything like that.....it does get my brain thinking though thats for sure. it allows me to jump all over the place to wherever my brain leads me. the T does the tapper things and tells me to "let my brain go wherever it needs to go" and then when she stops the tappers i talk about whatever im thinking. so, with my racing all over the place brain it helps cause it doesnt have to be a fluid conversation. one thing i notice is i am EXTREMELY tired afterwards. i always crash hard for a few hours after. hope that gives you a little perspective on how its worked for me so far.

[rainbow8]

summeryoga, I'm very sorry about your dog. Good luck with the EMDR.

struggling, your EMDR experience sounds almost exactly like mine! I thought I was doing it wrong too. I use the tappers also. My T says the same thing about letting my brain go wherever it wants to go. I've never had a major memory or flashback when doing EMDR either. I'm also very tired afterwards.

I have noticed that some of the memories that we've processed aren't "there" in the same way anymore. I know that's supposed to happen. Yeah, EMDR is kind of weird but I'm getting used to it. My T says I've had years of talk therapy and this is different, so I trust her that it will help me.

I really liked Getting Past Your Past, but the cases showed people who seemed to experience that instant recognition and success that I never have had with it. I liked the exercises that you can do by yourself, and the lists of negative cognitions in the book. It was all clearly written.

[struggling2]

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I really liked Getting Past Your Past, but the cases showed people who seemed to experience that instant recognition and success that I never have had with it. I liked the exercises that you can do by yourself, and the lists of negative cognitions in the book. It was all clearly written.

what were some of the exercises? maybe i need to get a copy of this book...

[velcro003]

Originally Posted by cometcatcher

I'm glad you asked this question, and I'm glad you've gotten the responses you have, but I'm surprised there aren't more EMDRers here. I'm not one, myself, but I came to look at this thread because I've been thinking about the possibility of EMDR, too. I'm both curious and frightened.

What are the memories like that come out? Does it even bring out memories, exactly? Are they flashbacks? Will we re-experience the the trauma? Can it happen on a sensory level, too?

I've had a flashback before. It was definitely one of the most horrifying experiences of my life, but afterwards I felt... so free. So whole. So released and complete, I would do it again if I could. Walls of numbness rose again in a matter of time, and that feeling of wholeness melted away.
Preceding the flashback, I had no idea what was coming, but the whole day I felt odd; sick, loopy, frightened for no apparent reason. It was a unique, unpleasant cocktail of emotional and and physical sensation, like a prodrome. And now that I've felt it, it's unmistakable for anything else.

And now, years later, I'm feeling it again, the "prodrome." There's something in there that wants to come out. But it just won't. It's stuck or something. It's hovering behind my head, just out of sight. I've felt so numb and dead inside for so long, and I really believe that once the memories come out I can start to be whole again.

I wonder if EMDR could help that process along? I don't know what the memory is going to be (though I might know what "category" it falls under), so I wouldn't know what to focus on while the session is going. But you said your T wants you to use EMDR for more of a generalized recovery? I wonder how that will work if you don't have a specific trauma-related image to focus on? Would you mind sharing how exactly your T says the process will go in a case in which there isn't something particular on which to be focused?

I think EMDR is perfect for helping get out of a stuck place-that is why I am trying it! I have been meeting with my EMDR-T for a long time without even doing any EMDR. It was a lot of family genogram stuff, regular talk therapy, and me getting used to all the ideas and language that is used in EMDR that isn't in traditional talk therapy. I'm a slow adapter I have done the actual tapper thingys once-and it was just to think of "protective, wise, nurturing" figures (real or imaginary) to put in place in my brain to help when we do the hard stuff. I felt no different, and I struggled with even that exercise.

My T seems to be ok with all of it, and we switched tactics. I don't remember a ton of my childhood, nor was I ever abused.There are memories that I would say are unpleasant, but they have no emotional connection now. I am actually going to do EMDR next time on all of last year at work. It was a very long, difficult and traumatizing year. She said that it is a safer topic because it isn't about my childhood, and the emotions are easily accessible since it was so recent. She did say that it could link to memories of the past.

THe way my T has explained how EMDR works (as much as current knowledge exists) is that when traumatizing things happen as a kid, and don't get resolved--those memories stay stuck in your brain-way back in the brain, where regular talk therapy doesn't access. The way a "normal" memory works is that it goes through your amyglada (?), and then maybe the hippocampus (i am trying to remember this off the top of my head!), and then the chemicals get stored in regions of the brain where memories are stored: either long term or short term. With traumatic memories, the chemicals are either produced in large quantities (you had a hyperarousal reaction-much anxiety, hypervigilant), and that excess gets siphoned off to the "old brain." If you shut down during the incident, there weren't enough chemicals and it got stuck in some part (amyglada or hippocampus), and once again is not in the "correct" part where memories are stored.

WHEW. I didn't think I would remember all that! (No pun intended)

Originally Posted by struggling2

i one thing i notice is i am EXTREMELY tired afterwards. i always crash hard for a few hours after. hope that gives you a little perspective on how its worked for me so far.

I am SO afraid of that!! I go in the middle of my work day--so I need to go back to a classroom of 2 year olds the rest of the day

[summeryoga]

I went and experienced EMDR yesterday! A recount of my experience is posted here:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/showt...77#post2345977