Have you ever been too depressed to go to a session?

So despite being so depressed and spending days in bed...I went to see T today..I pushed myself-to take a shower (didn't want to stink-hehe) and go-and I'm so thankful I did...I know now that if I can get through right now-I should never try to cancel-I can do it!!

My depression does not run in cycles, it is chronic and progressive, so I always feel really down, every day, every month, every year. Some weeks I am more aggressive and violent than others. It is these weeks I stay home. I stay home to minimise the risk of me hurting people at the T's office. I am the violent one so its my responsibility to ensure that others are safe. This is why I do not go a lot of weeks. Some Ts have a problem with this but the bottom line is, its either I stay home or you are going to have a lot of corpses outside your office!! I told one T this and she looked at me with her eyes boggling, like I was a madwoman, haha