How did you find your T?

You guys remember Tentative Connection, I'm sure. I didn't have insurance. And she gave me the number to this place where I could see an intern. After that, I was assigned a random person. She is awesome, so it was the luck of the draw I guess.

I found a local counselling centre. I called and asked for a male therapist who fit in my work schedule. I stayed with him for a long time until he moved on. My new T works at the same centre and is a much better fit for me.

On the Psychology Today website. It was between T (who had such kind eyes in her pic - and I thought she was younger than she turned out to be) and an older gentleman who had a grandfatherly look (which I'm drawn to also).

In the end, the eyes won.

I was released from the psych ward and put in a day program. I met my T in the program and he stuck with me through it all since then

Off topic, but you are very fond of the colour indigo!

strangely, I cannot remember; which tells me it was a work of Providence.

(note... T says she agrees, my coming to her was a work of Providence, but when SHE says it, I'm not sure that's good news,.... .)

I knew that I wanted an psychoanalyst, so I found my therapist by contacting the psychoanalytic instituted in city near me, and asking for a referral to a candidate. Candidates (scholars) are thoroughly screened and are already therapists. My therapist had been practicing for 30 years.

She later listed on Psychology Today, so I would use that as a resource if I needed one again.

It was important to me to find a depth therapist, after having a few therapists of other orientations. So knowing that, it helped my search. I got lucky and the person I was referred to is the person I am still in therapy with, 5 years later.

I hope you find just exactly what you are looking for!


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I went to my University counselling center with a name offerred by a friend, but also checked him out on the Univ web-site first. I'm an academic, so credentials are important to me and I knew my issues were deeper than having arguments with a room mate, so I didn't want an intern or MA-level therapist. Mine turned out to be the chief psychologist who also supervised the post doc interns. He had the credentials and expertise I felt I needed, and I felt a lot of confidence in him after our first session. Very lucky.

I saw him on TV, liked what he said and how down to earth he was, looked him up online (his CV and some papers he wrote), send a mail, have a short phone consult and went to see him.
About filling the questionnaire- you could tell them to postpone it few sessions, till you are sure you want to give that T a go. A good T wouldn't mind.

Knew I needed help with an ED. For some reason, I mostly disregarded my insurance's list of in network providers.

Started googling ED T's in my area. Weren't many user friendly lists, but I looked up a few on the web. My T had the best website, which I admit was actually significant to me because she put the time into it and i was barely 22 at the time.

I actually called another T first that was geographically closer, but this T insisted on giving me turn by turn directions even though I said I would put it into my GPS. No doubt she was being nice, but it rubbed me wrong. lol.

I never had to fill out any sort of form about my issues. Just insurance stuff.

My pastor gave me a referral. It worked out very well.

I suffer from an ED as well.

I was referred to another woman by my XT and the woman refused to take me, but one of her male counterparts did.

I was assigned one at my center. I like her but she's a bit to calm and meek.

I saw one about 14 years ago or so who had a lot of credentials, was recommended by someone I respect, had a ph.d and who was the worst therapist I have ever met save for one man who was just an arrogant jerk. For me, credentials did nothing. They do have to be female and older than me.

I found my long term T purely by chance. I had just moved to the city and was in crisis - I needed to see someone ASAP. I had called I don't know how many Ts in the phone book and was having trouble finding anyone with openings. I had booked two tentative intro appointments, but even they were at least two weeks away.
Then I called my Ts community center. The receptionist had gone home sick, and my T was inbetween clients so was manning the front desk. She also happened to have a cancellation that afternoon. I stayed with her for many years, and a decade later we still keep in touch after ending therapy with her we still keep in touch.

I'm sorry you had that experience. Of course, there are duds in every profession, despite credentials. But I still maintain that credentials increase the odds of finding a quality therapist. The level of knowledge is vastly different at the PhD, and the requirement for self-examination and supervision is far more extensive. I think it increases the likelihood of weeding out ill-informed and/or compromised therapists. The codes of conduct, in some states, can also be more stringent.

My T was also an ABPP, which is the highest certification available. Another indication of knowledge base. None of this insures a personality fit, but I think does go far to insure competence.

I don't disagree with you about this. I have had three T's: #1 was an MD, #2 was a Ph.D., and #3, my current T, is an MSW. Current T has 30 years of experience, more than both my former T's had at the time I was seeing them. I think that experience counts for a lot, probably is more important than degree. Also, the more time anyone has spent in the field, the more they have likely continued to study (even if only through CEU's). I think that self-examination may not be so much a function of education/training but more a personal choice some make. I suspect some T's do their self examination before they even enter school and others do it along the way.

I have really benefited from all my T's. It might just be that I'm older and maybe wiser now, but I think I've done more in this latest round of therapy than I ever imagined I would. I actually set out to see another Ph.D. for a T, but for various reasons ended up with my current one. Now I'm a big fan of the MSW for a T.

I needed a T for help with an alcoholic family member. The situation was bleak and complicated. I tried calling numerous places I'd found on the internet without success. Finally, I spoke to someone from a substance abuse center who, after hearing my story, could not help either but she gave me the name of my current T. He was a godsend then and continues to be there for me now.

I got names from people I trust, then researched them on the internet (and psychologytoday was particularly helpful). Narrowed it down to about 8 people, and did a phone interview. 2 or 3 said they weren't taking new clients or weren't available at the times I had available or something that knocked them off the list. I asked about what their training was (CBT, PCA, Jung, Gestalt, Gottman...?) Then I made appointments with 3 of them (and told all three what I was doing and they said they were willing to participate) and had a session (that I paid for) as if I was starting with them, and then chose one. I'm really glad I did it that way.
It was a bit long of a process, and at times I wanted to speed it up. But I'm really glad I didn't short circuit the process. I learned a lot. One of the session/interviews was very revealing, and I thought she was the one I would want. She had all the right backgrounds and seemed very warm. I liked the session with her - until I asked a question at the end and she felt challenged and I didn't even think I was asking a challenging question - just informational. She took it as a challenge and wouldn't answer! I didn't choose her.

I totally agree. I saw someone for awhile, and when we got in trouble she didn't seem to have the foundation to know how to get out of it, or get her own support. I've since realized that she probably doesn't have any training, and in retrospect I can see things that were wrong, but I ignored the red flags.

Syra, that's what I think happens to a lot of people, and it's so unfortunate. It's much easier to judge the results of the work of other professionals we hire in life: did the MD diagnose and treat properly is more definite; home repair can be judged by clear inspection; even in education, where the goals can be fuzzier, assessment is possible to some extent.

But when it comes to therapy, we spend a lot of money, get involved emotionally, and often it seems to be in resolving a transference that lesser trained therapists can quickly lose their way, and then it all goes downhill. And we're left to pick up the pieces. I hope you don't feel badly about not seeing the red flags because we're really not in a position to much of the time.

Someone referred me to both my xT and my current T. They both have doctorates, and both are brilliant and knowledgeable, one is more CBT driven and knew alot about OCD, and I'm not sure how my new T was trained, maybe psychoanalytical? Anyway, he does alot of work and writing on DID.

I think that even within the doctorate range, that it is also important to see a psychologist who is trained in whatever your issues are. I saw my first T who helped me learn to trust, and helped me understand my OCDness, but since I have attachment issues, I ended up having to see my new T in order to address these attachment issues due to possible developmental trauma. My 2 cents.

I think that experience counts for a lot, probably is more important than degree. Also, the more time anyone has spent in the field, the more they have likely continued to study (even if only through CEU's). I think that self-examination may not be so much a function of education/training but more a personal choice some make. I suspect some T's do their self examination before they even enter school and others do it along the way.

I would agree, Anne, that experience is crucial, especially depth and diversity of experience, rather than simply years of experience. But while some at the Masters level do pursue self-examination, many do not. A value of the PhD is that it's a requirement, especially rigorous among those who pursue a psychoanalytic philosophy, often continued through the supervision of the post doc internship.

While the dissertation is rarely valuable in itself post-degree in most fields, the years needed to complete it are often coupled with working in a supervised practice setting; so by the time therapists hang out the shingle, they've also already had a few years of experience.

it is also important to see a psychologist who is trained in whatever your issues are.

Very true. Most PhD programs give exposure to most major modalities. As practitioners, they can choose to specialize, though many remain eclectic together with areas of particular interest. This is a benefit because, as you experienced, sometimes we're dealing with multiple issues, or new issues are uncovered that we weren't aware of at the beginning.