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#1
Apr 05, 2013, 04:47 PM
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I just feel like sharing this to someone
 For months now I've been feeling totally careless, I've literally not cared for anything! I haven't been able to cry, not even when my mom threatened to throw me out or when she locked me inside a small room with no lights on (which was craaaazy). I haven't felt happy about anything either, and it's really been bugging me. When I've been to therapy I've felt like I haven't been taken seriously, because I have shown no emotions what so ever. HOWEVER! On wednesday I saw my therapist again, and we talked about me not being able to feel anything, and she told me about something called "affect phobia", which is fear of feeling, and I could totally relate to everything she said. She asked me a lot of questions, and as I answered them, we realized I've been trying to protect myself by blocking out all emotions. And suddenly, as we talked and I became aware of what was wrong, all my feelings just loosened up, and I CRIED, for the first time in MONTHS! It felt SOOOO good, and after the session, I've been feeling SO much in EVERY way! When something great happens, I genuinely feel happy about it, and I've actually been crying myself to sleep every night since our session, which sounds like a bad thing, but it's really been helping me get some emotional release! I'm so happy I'm finally feeling something again!  This was really a breakthrough for me, opening my heart and accepting my feelings.
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 Anonymous32765, Anonymous32825, Anonymous33425, BonnieJean, content30, Inner_Firefly, kaliope, murray, ShaggyChic_1201, Syra, unaluna, Willowleaf, wistful
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#2
Apr 05, 2013, 05:40 PM
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Thats great about your breakthrough Ballerina, It sounds so wonderful for you to be able to feel again and to feel alive. I hope this feeling continues and you and t can work to find the cause that blocked it.
 Sometimes crying is so painful but at times it is also so healing. I thought I was depressed for a long time but new t said I can't be depressed because I cry and crying is a feeling. |
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#3
Apr 05, 2013, 05:49 PM
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 I remember the same thing when I really started crying in therapy.  I hated it, and it felt sooo good
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| Anonymous32765
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#4
Apr 05, 2013, 06:47 PM
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congrats ballerina...im really happy that you have had such an amazing break through. great job!
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#5
Apr 05, 2013, 07:09 PM
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That's wonderful, ballerina! Thanks for sharing
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