04-JAN Session: Blank Slate

Eyes front! What is the client's fantasy?! That's what is important. Not the therapist's reality. And Stopdog you're probably right - at least I think healthy is boring. I'm trying to learn otherwise.

Why is that important?

Of course they are boring. They are professional voyeurs (I am not using the sexual definition here). They sit and listen (sometimes) to the sordid, absurd and horrible from other people all day. I think if they were, as a group, interesting on their own they would have chosen a different career.

Because it's revealing?

That's funny, stopdog! Maybe true too.

My T won't tell me anything about her H. That's why I looked him up on Facebook but I won't do that again. I wonder if she's gotten divorced since the 3 years I've been seeing her. It's my fantasy because she's kind of adamant about not talking about him. So it makes me curious since she has talked about her daughters with me.

Sometimes I hate therapy because of the one-sided relationship.

is it? like what? wondering -

I found this on the internet:

The therapist neutrality concept began with the psychoanalytic idea that if the analyst remains unknown, the analysand uses the analyst as a blank screen for projecting attachment responses to early caregivers. These responses are often the basis for relationship difficulties today, so it can be very helpful to have them revealed for client and therapist to see.

The attempt to offer oneself as a blank screen can be a barrier to successful therapy if it is rigidly practiced without awareness of the client’s individual needs. It can also be an obstacle if the therapist remains emotionally cold and distant as a defense against revealing unwanted thoughts or feelings. Said another way, the blank screen becomes a barrier if it prevents the client from experiencing support from the therapist for healing. My own approach is to find a balance where clients have the opportunity to discover their own thoughts as the therapist does more listening than talking.

Not all schools of therapy use the blank screen. Some, for instance, encourage the therapist to reveal personal responses to model emotional openness. Psychoanalysis may explicitly use neutrality in a disciplined way for clients who are sufficiently secure that they are ready to discover the depths of early childhood emotions and thoughts without distraction. I find that such depths can be revealed in therapy anyway by exploring our interactions here and now, when it’s appropriate in terms of timing, trust, and client capacity.

What I'm hearing here is that the blank slate should be used only if the patient finds it useful.

That is not what I took from the post. It's saying blank slate can be useful to the patient for reasons a, b, and c. There are some drawbacks to monitor. The blank slate should be adaptable.

It might be effective/helpful even if you do not find it so.

I am not saying this is how things are for you, however. It may, in fact, be harming you or it could be working in the grand scheme of things.