Counselling again

I've been out for a while (my new one went on vacation, and won't be back until September) but I've made the decision (with some support of one wonderful person who basically forced me into it again ... for my own benefit, believe me!) that I need it again.

This slippery slope is very hard to navigate all by my lonesome, and the last thing I want to do is slip so far that its nearly impossible to get back.

I just don't know how to tell the new person this. I've got a problem with speaking my mind, and trusting a person. So I'm liable to lie, and I don't have that luxury. I need this support.

Appointment is ths upcoming Wednesday (next week). Anyone have any pointers about how to get myself talking about the stuff I want to work on?

(((Hugs))) I know this is tough. Remember that the new T wants to do well by you also and make a good impression this first visit You might give a brief overview of some of the issues you might want to work on in the future... but imo you do need to get to know each other a little bit, rather than diving right into issues the first session.

write down what you are afraid you'll fib about......keep it in your lap and use it when you're talking to T......love, pat

I am with Pat I would write it down. In fact I would write it down MAIL a copy marked confidential and personal and take a copy in. I think I would do that , but maybe I am too chicken. It is the smart thing to do.
You have my best

When I start with a new therapist I don't just jump into the nitty gritty. I know from experience one sure way that got my past therapists uneasy was the times I walked in their door sat down and they intorduced their self and I did the same Hi Im so and so I have nightmares flashbacks, past problems with anerexia, self injury, and suicide... At this point the therapist is looking at me with this confused look that says oh shoit what did I get myself into with this nut because in my nerviosness I am probably leaving out words and getting tongue tied and so on and I end up going back to the beginning and telling the therapist one item at a time so that they can understand me.

So now what I usually do is sit down throughout the days preceeding the appointment and writing down Why I need to be in therapy, what my problems are, what my goals are surrounding those problems and 4-5 give or take ideas of how to accomplish those goals during therapy. I also write down things that are typically asked during the first few sessions - name address phone number, Medical insurance card number, address and phone number so that I have all the info that I need when I am sitting there in the reception area and the receptionist hands me that clipboard with papers to fillin and sign (including the agencys privacy confidentiality protocal). I also write down any questions that I want answers to BEFORE I go into detail about things such as the agency's protocal for self injury and suicidal behavior, the therapists background of working with PTSD, Depression, Sexual abuse, The agency and therapist protocals on after hours phone calls and the number to call for after hours because I don't like getting into the thick of things and be having new memories and so on going on and not have the information that I need.

Then when I go to my intake appointment I take those papers and information with me. Worse case scenerio I get tongue tied all I have to do is hand over the papers and let the therapist read it for theirself, and make copy if needed.

Once I start seeing a therapist I make sure I get to my appointments 15 minutes to a half hour early so that I can watch the comings and goings of the therapists that work in that same agency that my therapist does and also so that I can see how my therapist interacts with the co workers and clients in general as they are coming out of sessions.

This way one -

I can get a feel for what and how my therapist is like without either one of us (the therapist or me) being on the hot seat of the "first sessions"

And two -
I always choose a back up therapist. I hate being in the thick things and not knowing who is answering calls and how that person is going to react to my calls and so on when I need a therapist and my therapist is unavailable (vacations, deaths in their familys, out of town attending workshops and seminars and so on).

By picking a backup Im not left hanging for two weeks and so on. and the back up is kept informed just in case I happen to need them whem my therapist is unavailable. No matter what the situation going on with my main therapist I don't have to worry be it tonight tomorrow or next month, when ever and for whatever I need I know that I can call the agency and say - "Hi Im so and so and I need to speak to LL and if she is not available my back up is EW." or "Hi Im so and so LL is my therapist she is out of town this week I need to speak to EW" Either way I know that my calls will be put through and the person I will be talking to are the two people who know what has been going on for the past 5 years in therapy and so on.

hang in there

Hi everyone,

Just got back from my appointment. I still fibbed, BIG time. Took the Beck Depression Inventory and I lied.

And she made me feel really lousy talking about how they only usually provide 5 appointments to see a counsellor because of the amount of people there is.

So no counselling for Christina until September and then I might try to see my (now former) counsellor again... she was easier to talk to.

((((Canders))))) Thinking of you - these changes and transitions are so hard. I'm sorry the meeting with the new counselor was so difficult, and it will be a wait until you can see another counselor....maybe even needing to return to your former counselor. I just wanted to say I am thinking of you.

Take care,
ErinBear

We'll try to hold you up sweetie!

You can lean on us.

Thank you ErinBear and Petunia...

Got in contact with my first counsellor, and I now have resources to see other people OFF campus, but I don't want my family to find out. They can't actually, I tried telling them before and it didn't end up going well.

*sighs* Oh well, thanks

Candy,

Why can't you see the former counselor before Sept?

Quit lying on those tests or you're going to hear it from me, woman!!!!!

Hugs,

Jan

Former counsellor is on vacation until September.

I couldn't help it January! She was verbally asking me them, if she had just told me to fill it out it would have been different ... kept staring at me and I don't like it when people stare I get it enough already.

Truth is good. Hope things work out better for you TC

I'm so sorry, Candy. I don't like people to stare at me, either.

Hugs,

Jan

I've lied to my T at times too. I usually just correct it in the next session. My T seems pretty understanding of my tendency to lie slightly at times since I almost always correct it later. I'm sure your T can understand that some of the questions are rather embarasing. I always hate the suicidal thoughts question on many of the depression tests.
I hope you get things figured out so you can get a T that you can work with.