[Raging Quiet]

Sorry if there are lots of threads about this :/

I've been seeing T for 3 years this summer; she's helped me through my darkest times.

I'm due to have fertility treatment soon and facing us to that has bought up a lot more rubbish from childhood.

Suddenly, me and my T have hit resistance at a time where I can feel myself going down the rabbit hole. I just can't speak to her. Part of me feels she shouldn't have to deal with me in her 70's anymore to.

Last week we ended super early, she asked me to rearrange a session (which is fine) and she mentioned how helpless people can feel when people have infertility issues. I feel like I'm a burden to her now, but she is my only rock. She got really angry with me 2 weeks ago and apologised last week. I hate making her angry, it isn't fair on her.

I just wondered why there is suddenly resistance

[granite1]

could your resistance be comming from the fact that she got so angry at you. i know when my T gets angry it causes problems.

[stopdog]

It sounds like you are focussing on/ taking on too much about the therapist to me. I don't believe you can make someone else angry and if the other person becomes angry, it is not a matter of fairness. If the therapist chooses to continue working into her 70's, then she gets the full range of what being a therapist entails and it is kind of condescending (in my opinion) to think that because of her age she cannot handle all the job entails.

[Raging Quiet]

Thanks for your replies; you both make valid points.

I suppose I just feel all of her vulnerabilities.

I think perhaps I need to end seeing her soon and seeing someone else that specialises in infertility.

Take care.

Hi, I went through infertility treatment 26 yrs ago. Now have 3 children (twins due to fertility treatment). It is a very difficult time. I wouldn't make any rash decisions or judgements. Perhaps you feel your T being infertile now (you mentioned her age) couldn't understand you being as infertile as her but at an age when you really shouldn't? Perhaps it's easy for you to think if her being angry at you, rather then you be angry at yourself/her?

There is hope. It seems impossible but miracles do happen. They did for me.

Originally Posted by Rect0pathic

I suppose I just feel all of her vulnerabilities.

Sounds like you want to care for her? Have the lines been blurred between you and her?

[Sannah]

I would suggest getting all of this out in the open with her.

[WePow]

I agree that it might help to just bring it all up to your T. Maybe she wishes she could help in some way with the fertility issue? Sometimes Ts try too hard and they can get upset with themselves for not being able to "fix" a client.

[Raging Quiet]

I suppose lines have been blurred.

I just can't do anything right as a client. I think it's time to leave; thanks for all your help xxx

[WePow]

Originally Posted by Rect0pathic

I suppose lines have been blurred.

I just can't do anything right as a client. I think it's time to leave; thanks for all your help xxx

I had a T tell me once "The only job you have in therapy is to show up. It is my job to help make the rest happen."

You did nothing wrong at all.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by Rect0pathic

I'm due to have fertility treatment soon and facing us to that has bought up a lot more rubbish from childhood.
...
I just wondered why there is suddenly resistance

Haven't you already answered your own question?

Fertility issues raise some existential questions. It really is a matter of life and death. You are bound to feel a full range of emotions.

[Sannah]

Don't run Rectopathic. If you stop and work through it you will learn a lot and work through it. If you run it will just follow you.