Is it time to say goodbye?

((calista))

I'm in.

hi Calista,

thinking of you & hoping things went well for you.

I got into this late, but I'm hoping the session produced some plan for future work.
I keep thinking of what you wrote, "I miss what I had....family, a good support system and people irl, who really went out of their way to make me feel safe."

To a large extent, I feel the same way. I'll be 67 pretty soon, and I'm more alone every year. You said you'd been with you T 15 yrs I think. How old is he? Part of his behaviour and treatment of you may be age related.

I hope you check in. I hope you know you have support here & people who care.

roadie

well crap! I had to cancel Wednesdays appointment because I was in dexadrine withdrawal cause of a mistake my med doc made. He denies it (of course) I wasn't able to reach him for two days. He basically told me there was no mistake and I need to suck it up until I can refill my script. So I did. I felt like death but I did it. Then Friday rolls around (supposed to be my next T appointment) Guess who cancelled? NOT me! T had "plans". After all the bull I get when I cancel and how "fragile" he said I am...he cancels. He said he cannot be responsible for my care if I don't go. He's cancelled as much as I have.
His age could be a part of it. He's 72. I just want some comfort and security back in my life.

So pocket riders....can you all reschedule till next Wednesday? Thanks.

((((((((((Calista))))))))))

Next Wednesday is free. : )

I am still going back and forth;one minute I feel I don't want/need therapy. The next minute I am a needy 5 year old. I feel it's just a matter of time before I lose this T also. He is getting older; retirement can't be far from his mind. I'm afraid I'm too much for him to handle too. Sometimes I don't even believe I deserve to feel better.

Just read this...huge hugs for you. And you ALWAYS deserve to feel better, no matter what.
My T terminated with no notice in 2010 and I still haven't been able to deal because he was excellent and no one has been able to take his place. I also have family that has recently pushed me out (idk why, I have just been excluded) so I completely feel your pain on that issue. I am so sorry about how awful you feel. I know you are feeling so alone but we are here for you as much as that helps.