[tinyrabbit]

This has probably been covered a lot before so I will do a search as well, but I hope you don't mind me starting a new thread.

I have 3 weekly sessions before my T takes a 2-week break. I coped okay with the Christmas break because we had only recently got started. I think it will be much harder this time and would really like to hear about how other people cope with the gaps.

[elliemay]

One thing I've learned, at least in my therapy, is that therapist always come back. I can put my faith in that. For me, it's important because I know the time will be limited.

I also take it day by day. It's sometimes surprising to learn that the time will pass anyway, regardless of how we feel during it. Also, something that helps me.

We get to be sad. It's okay to feel that way.

But they do come back.

[ECHOES]

You mentioned in another post about so much coming out at once, and I think that makes a looming break in therapy much scarier. Let her know your thoughts now, so you will have time to maybe slow things down a bit before the break. That has helped me.

My pattern seems to be that I dread the break, but I'm fine during the break (T? what T?), then I am pulled away (punish her by pushing her away?) when we resume. It can take a session or two to get back in the groove This is after 6 years with this T. In the beginning, I would have all these wild fantasies about T deciding to retire, deciding to move (to where she was visiting), to drop me as a patient, and any other form of abandonment I could dream up. It was very scary and painful at the time. I learned to speak about my fears and that helped, not only to process them but so she knew what I tended to experience when faced when a break.

I have taken suggestions from PCers about using the time I would normally be having my session to do something like writing in a journal, or just doing something special for myself like going out to dinner with a good book (whatever sounded enjoyable at the time), and that has been a good suggestion.

[stopdog]

I find it odd for the first week and then I don't usually think about it if the break is longer than a week. I do take breaks myself, so a break does not really bother me. I don't enjoy or look forward to therapy appointments. It is like voluntarily submitting to torture and paying for it as far as I am concerned. I am not saying it is not supposed to be ultimately useful, so maybe more like a dentist without any novocaine.
Sometimes I think about how they probably react to my vacations - I don't think they care whether I am there or not. Why would it be different for me with them.
It can be nice I think, to use the therapy money for something fun as a way to handle it - like dinner or a play sort of thing.

[tinyrabbit]

Thanks for your replies. A lot came out last week but I ended up feeling very contained and ready to say okay there's a big mess but we don't have to pick it all up right now.

I like the idea of using the money for something nice. Though probably not all of it!

[Willowleaf]

I was about to post something very similar. My t left for her break today and it has been awful for the last couple of weeks knowing this was coming. It's horrible waiting and worrying about an impending break. I know there have been other posts but I too wondered what others do when they are missing their t. Hang on in there little rabbit, you are not alone. I too coped at Christmas but because I wasn't at work then it was easier to look after myself. Mine suggested I spend the session time doing something nice for myself

[Hope-Full]

I second what elliemay said - the therapist really does always come back. It only took me two years of vacations to finally accept that!
Like ECHOES said, I try to schedule something else for the time I usually see T, something that I enjoy. This last time T was away was really hard, so I wrote T a letter each day, which was surprisingly quite helpful. I plan to try that again during Ts next break in a few months and see if it is as helpful then.

[wotchermuggle]

I think of it as a way to practice what I've learned or check to see how I can manage on my own for a bit.

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