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#1
May 23, 2013, 08:46 AM
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My therapist suggested today that we should have our next session at my apartment, so that I wouldn't have to travel so far (T's office is an hour away) and that she for once could be the one who had to travel
 Have any of you had t at home? How is it? I'm not sure I'll be able to get in the "therapy mood", and I get this weird feeling trying to imagine her sitting at my couch instead of the other way around!
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#2
May 23, 2013, 08:53 AM
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I would freak out. Not that it's wrong, I just....yikes. Wow.
You do have the right to say no. If you want.
__________________
never mind... |
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#3
May 23, 2013, 08:55 AM
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I had a session in a restaurant once and that was difficult, I can't imagine my home. Is there a problem with you travelling that far? I use to drive 1-1/2 to 2 hours (and twice that in rush hour traffic to get home).
__________________
"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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#4
May 23, 2013, 08:59 AM
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I would not be comfortable at all with that and am kind of surprised your T didn't suggest a neutral location---even a park half-way between.
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#5
May 23, 2013, 09:10 AM
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I think that this is a very kind gesture on her part. She might also want to do it to get more of a sense of who you are and see you in your "natural habitat." Yalom talks about doing this in his book The Gift of Therapy. I think it'd be neat to have my T over. I think it would be harder to get into "therapy mode," but I'm sure it'd be fine after a few minutes.
Of course, if you are not comfortable with this, then you don't need to do this. You can set/keep your boundaries. However, I think it would be interesting and different for both of you! |
 winter4me
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#6
May 23, 2013, 09:32 AM
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You got me wondering about logistics. Are you her only client that morning?? Is she going to be in the neighborhood anyway for some reason? Will she bring Starbucks?
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#7
May 23, 2013, 09:39 AM
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I travel for an hour too (70mins in traffic)- not what I would consider a long travel.
Frankly, I don't see the logic behind it- like doesn't she have other clients too? Seems weird.But back to your Q: I did have few sessions at home- was after a difficult operation, spent like 2 months at a hospital (1 session at the hospital- worst idea ever) and then another 3 at home. So my T offered that we could do therapy this way- better than a SKYPE, worse than his office. It was weird at first but I felt really low (and being so sick didn't help a bit, I may add) so I was really grateful to my T for doing that for me (offered to pay for his travel but he refused- felt a bit bad because of that). All and all it is done. 
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#8
May 23, 2013, 09:42 AM
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Oh hell, if she's bringing Starbucks you've got to let her in. No one should turn away a free starbucks.
__________________
never mind... |
| HealingTimes, winter4me
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#9
May 23, 2013, 09:49 AM
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I thought I replied to this but it hasn't shown up. I was thinking about starting a thread on just this topic as we had a flyer through the door from someone who does therapy at your home, so it's always a home visit, and I wondered if people ever had their Ts come round as I ended up having this little fantasy where my T knocked on my door (because his car had broken down or something) and ended up coming in for coffee and meeting my husband and cat.
In reality, I don't know that I would want him to come here as I'd feel he was somehow analysing things about how everything is in my house. In any case I like T being removed from everything else. I work at home, I don't want this to be my therapy space too, that's too much in one. I think it would be a good idea to discuss this at some length with your T before you actually do it, if you do. |
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#10
May 23, 2013, 09:58 AM
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I do phone sessions with my t, me in my home and she in hers a few states away. So I sorta do t at home only one-sidedly. (is that a word?) I was worried at first that i wouldn't be able to get into therapy mode and I wasn't that first time when I called her, until I heard her voice, then I was able to close my eyes and imagine sitting in her office like we used to. that worked. I've gotten used to it now 6 months later so the whole getting in therapy mood isn't a problem. Good luck with the t in home thing! I for one would welcome the opportunity to have a t session at home. It would mean my t would have to be in town!
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#11
May 23, 2013, 10:03 AM
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I'd freak out and feel the need to obsessively clean and make everything perfect before T got here. Then, I'd feel the need to play host rather than focus on therapy. So, for me, it probably wouldn't be a good option. Of course, if I wanted to work on those behaviors, then it might be a good thing to try.
I've had phone sessions with T, and those are fine - she's in her office, I'm at home. T has this eerie ability to hear even the most minute change in my breathing while on the phone....she reads me almost as well on the phone as she does in person.
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---Rhi |
| Freewilled
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#12
May 23, 2013, 10:04 AM
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Hmm, never came up but I have thought about taking pictures of my home to show T. Not the same thing I know but I do think that if T has a full picture of who you are (meaning not just what you share in the office) your T will be able to understand you better and therefore help more.
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#13
May 23, 2013, 10:16 AM
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Quote:
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#14
May 23, 2013, 10:40 AM
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Quote:
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#15
May 23, 2013, 10:47 AM
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In some ways i like the idea of that because i have a progressive illness which leaves me very tired all the time and sometimes i force myself to go to therapy when really i just want to stay home. But, i do think i'd worry about my house being perfect for her coming and actually i kind of like getting out the house and going to her office cos i isolate myself a lot so therapy is one thing that makes me leave the house.
I think it's really sweet that your therapist offered tho.
__________________
INFP Introvert(67%) iNtuitive(50%) iNtuitive Feeling(75%) Perceiving(44)% |
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#16
May 23, 2013, 11:04 AM
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The more I think about it, the more I wouldn't like this. What if somebody knocks on the door? What if the phone rings?
Also, I got to therapy in a town 20 minutes away. I don't go there much otherwise so it feels very removed from everything else and I like it that way. |
| Asiablue, HealingTimes
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#17
May 23, 2013, 11:30 AM
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That's a good point. I mean the phone can be turned off, and i suppose you could ignore the door but that's a bit awkward. How do you create a therapeutic space when you are immersed in all things in "real life"? At least in the therapy room, it's a contained environment.
__________________
INFP Introvert(67%) iNtuitive(50%) iNtuitive Feeling(75%) Perceiving(44)% |
| wotchermuggle
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#18
May 23, 2013, 11:55 AM
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I would be way too anxious for this to be therapeutic. Will T judge the dust accumulating under my bookcase? Will she wonder why the bed is unmade and toys are scattered all over the floor? Will she think poorly of my neighborhood? Clearly I'm not the best at receiving house guests!
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| HealingTimes
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#19
May 23, 2013, 11:58 AM
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Quote:
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#20
May 23, 2013, 12:23 PM
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A few of my friends in London have therapists who come to their house; especially if they have anxiety, health or eating issues. X
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#21
May 23, 2013, 12:46 PM
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Quote:
Sometimes i even drive past the end of her road when we are on a break and i am missing her..like yesterday  But, i would never agree to therapy in my own home.
__________________
“Change, like healing, takes time.”. Veronica Roth, Allegiant |
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#22
May 23, 2013, 12:57 PM
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My T does home visits as part of her other job and says she gets to know a lot more about a person by seeing them in their home than in her office. For that very reason I was adamantly opposed to the idea for a long time...too vulnerable. I would feel the need to make sure everything looked perfect and clean and orderly, but then again that's the same "front" I usually try to portray with everyone. No one gets to see the "real" me. So of course I couldn't let her come into my home and see that much more of me and my life. But then I was in a serious accident which left me with huge injuries. I was confined to a recliner for about 6 months. I could not drive or even sit in a chair at her office. So she came to my house. It was kind of my worst nightmare at first lol, because I couldn't clean or pick anything up or even shower before she came. She saw the real me...no makeup, no show, no pretend. It was one of the most healing experiences of my life. The sessions were often her just sitting with me in my pain, but I had never shown anyone my pain before. Injury aside, I think it was really helpful to have her come see me at my house, and see me in a more real way. It allowed me to be more vulnerable. Having said that, as soon as I felt better and could drive, I started to feel too vulnerable and wanted to go back to the neutrality of her office. I go back and forth now...we meet in her office, but part of me wants her to come back to my house for a session here and there to work on allowing her to see the real me again. I went to the other extreme after feeling better, because I had been so vulnerable out of necessity, I have pushed everyone completely away now. I'm sure when I get brave enough again I will let her come over again. But it's hard to be that vulnerable...so I don't know.
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 tinyrabbit, unaluna
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| tinyrabbit
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#23
May 23, 2013, 02:02 PM
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I don't know about home, but my office would be great. First I would have a chair and not the woman's horrible couch. Second it would be my space and not hers, and finally I would have my desk between us.
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#24
May 23, 2013, 03:04 PM
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Ooh, I do like the idea of meeting in my office, in my space.
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#25
May 23, 2013, 04:08 PM
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ive had my therapist at my house. its strange. but sometimes, it could be comforting. just do it somewhere you feel better. like i would never have my therapist come into my bedroom or something, it would feel like an invasion of privacy. but like, perhaps i would have her sit at my dining room table. you know? just take into consideration where you are having your meeting
__________________
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain. 
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