[sugahorse1]

I know I shouldn't even really be bothered about it, and I understand she's not well, but if people have been following how I've battled the last 2 weeks, you'll understand that I really think I needed to see her. I was better this week and my appointment was for Wed afternoon, but I was even considering phoning her earlier because I'd nearly had a breakdown last Thursday.

Now I have to wait until next Wed. Or maybe next week Monday and Wed. But I think I'm a bit sad that I didn't get to see her this week. I hope I'll be ok

Suga, it's tough when we feel in need & the person we need doesn't appear to be there. I hope you see her soon & her absence is unusual & not common.

[Lamplighter]

(((((( Suga )))))))

Just because she has a valid reason for cancelling your session, doesn't mean you're somehow not 'allowed' to feel bad and sad about it. In fact if I were in your place I'd be feeling pretty angry too (which seems not ok considering the T is sick, and obviously can't help it and hasn't cancelled deliberately.) But whatever you are feeling, you are right to feel it - I hope you are not squashing how you feel because you think you are wrong to feel that way?

I haven't read your story so not sure about the background - it sounds like you really needed your T's support right now and she's effectively let you down (I know, not deliberately, but that might be how it feels.) Is there anyone else you could go to, to tide you over until you can see your T again next week?

I hope you stay safe and hang in there

Torn

[tinyrabbit]

(((hugs)))

It's totally understandable that you're upset. I would be too.

[sugahorse1]

Thanks everyone.
I definitely battle in that my logical thinking often tried to override and rationalize my emotions, and even in this case is saying it's not ok to be upset.

I just nearly had a breakdown on Thursday night and went thro a few really depressed days. She's going to call if there's a cancellation. And I think if I really needed to, I could leave a message for her to all me

Suga
This sucks but unfortunately ts are human and get sick which makes them seem real, ackkkkk! Tiny rabbit is absolutely right though you are allowed to feel upset and angry. You are entitled to your feelings, how are you feeling now?
Do you have the option to email and tell t about your breakdown and why you needed to see t so bad?

[sugahorse1]

I unfortunately only have her office phone number, and I communicate through her receptionist. I can leave a message for her to phone me though.

I feel ok. I should have phoned when I had my breakdown, but at the end of the day I did make it through

Well I am glad you are feeling better now but if you feel like you need your t you should ring her and she can get back to you when she can. Mind yourself

[mixedup_emotions]

((( sugahorse1 )))

Ugh. That is so hard to deal with. I can totally understand the inner critic telling you it's not ok to be upset, sad, angry. You've gotten a lot of great feedback here, and I hope you can see that it's absolutely understandable to have those feelings. Sure, it wasn't deliberate, but it's ok to feel let down.

I hope your T can find a way to fit you in when she's feeling better or that there's a cancellation soon. I know it's hard to reach out when you're in need.

[Raging Quiet]

(((Suga))

I understand how you feel. I truly hope you can see your T soon and speak to her about everything xxx