[jacq10]

Okay ... so i'm new to university .. and its coming around the time where i have to (well i'm making myself) find a new T. I don't necessarily want to .. but i feel as though i need to. I'm so scared though. I'm relatively new to this whole thing, and i dont want people to know ... but i have a roomate, and we actually do everything together. what do i tell her? And i'm scared that if i do go and see about talking to someone that all they will be thinking in their head is "why are you being so dramatic, your just a needy teenager who thinks there is something wrong with you so you can get attention." Which by the way is not true, but sometimes i feel as though thats what i look like. I have no real reason to be as unhappy as i am ... so why am i this way? Anyways ... tomorrow i'm actually making myself go to the university center and checking this out ... i'm just so scared :S

[Christina86]

(((((((((Jacqueline))))))))))

I know how you feel - been there done that (and actually went back and did it again and had my first appointment yesterday.)

You do NOT have to tell your roomate - say you have an appointment and leave it at that. If she questions you further, say you're getting help with the transition to university (which is a problem that a LOT of first years have - okay 99.9% of new students!!!) She should accept it. If she makes a mean comment or jokes about it, shrug it off. You're taking care of yourself, which is the most responsible thing you could ever do. If it ever comes to the point where you're comfortable telling her what you're going for appointments in, then you can tell her. My roomate for example knows I'm in therapy, and she knows that some of it is for depression but she does not know that another one of my reasons is how to deal with her!

Counsellors don't think you're being dramatic and doing it for attention - because you are not. I think they'd rather you taking care of yourself in therapy than being out there without it and risk all sorts of problems. They actually do care. I know its a bit alienating seeing someone new for the first time, but be open about how you think they might receive you. If you think they're treating you in a way because you think that they're thinking you're lying or doing something for attention - ASK THEM about it! They don't bite. Also their should be more than one therapist at your university right? If one doesn't work out, ask to see someone new. Its about the best fit for you because they want you to succeed in university.

You're unhappy for many different reasons, you might not know them but through therapy you can try to figure it out.

Good luck at the university centre getting that appointment of yours!!

I know you're scared - but it will be okay. First time is always a bit unerving but the therapists know that so they'll do whatever they can to make you feel comfortable.

*hugs* Take care of yourself

[Perna]

You don't need a "reason" to feel unhappy. If you're unhappy, you're unhappy!

I went to my university counseling center when I was at university (1970 :-) and it turned out pretty well. The t's can take care of themselves, don't worry about what they think. If they don't feel you have a problem they'll let you know. Good luck!

It's not too bad there; you just sign in on a sheet and they do an intake interview then call you in a couple days and tell you the outcome/their recommendations.

I actually had a picture of me in the University newspaper, they were talking about the counseling center building and I was leaving a session (I'm not identified in the picture or anything and there were other classes and stuff in that building).

[jacq10]

((( Canders ))) - I hope that your appointment well well yesterday

And thanks for the advice about my roomate ... We get along really well, but its too soon to know whether or not i want to tell her anything about this yet. ... I guess the counselling that i had at my high school was just so low key, and casual that i never really worried about it .... but here its so much more complicated :S ... i guess i will give it a try though.

(((perna)))) - thanks for the good wishes. But what is this intake interviewing process? I read on the website here that they do that too ... but i dont understand why they need that. What if they get the wrong impression of me? What if i freeze and then they think i'm just making everything up? ... this is all so confusing

[Christina86]

((((((((((jacqueline)))))))))

I never had counselling in highschool, but have heard that it is quite different (obviously). Give it a try, its so entirely worth it.

As for your roomate, do you know if she has ever gone to a counselling appointment before? I know the stigma of telling anyone that you're in therapy - but you just remember, that a LOT of people really want someone to talk to and want to be in counselling but are too afraid to take the first step!! (Like my little sister for an example, got to health services but couldn't make the appointment - too nervous).

As you probably know, the first appointment is very basic, depending on what you're there for they just collect basic info about you - nothing indepth.

My appointment went very well.

When I was in college for part of the time I had a roommate and was seeing a therapist. She had no idea that I was seeing a therapist. I didn't explain a thing. she would invite me somewhere and Id say sorry I have plans and ask her how her day went. Roommates dont have to and rarely do they confide everything with each other. having a roommate is basically a financial arrangement most times and the roommates usually have their own things to do besides what they do together. sometimes they have complete different groups of friends, have different likes and dislikes and so on. Unless the roommate is also seeing a therapist at the same therapy agency the odds of the roommate finding out in other ways that you see a therapist is slim to none. and university centers are usually not just for therapy. Usually the financial aid office is in the center as is the nurses office and probably other offices too and those offices have many people coming and going. Someone recognizes you, you can always say you just got done at another office and decided to do some site seeing or not explain at all whay you are there because its no ones business.

I saw in another post you were asking what intake process is - its basically the first visit where you do paper work stuff - name address phone number, insurance and time for you to explain why you want or need to be in therapy and sometimes this session is also used to start drawing up a goal plan for you.

[eskielover]

Jacq,

You may feel that there isn't anything to make you feel the way you are feeling, but there may be something in your past that you aren't aware of that is making you feel the way you are feeling. It sometimes isn't until we look into the past with some help that we realize what is helping to cause the feelings we are experiencing.

Don't feel bad about feeling the need for a T.......if is helps you get through your college years, that is what is important. I know it is scarry trying to find a new T, let alone a good one. It is a process on your part as much as it is on their part.

I hope everything goes well & as far as letting your roommate know about that aspect of your life......it isn't needed unless there becomes a reason for that information to be shared.

Take care of yourself......that is the most important thing in your life.....not what other people think.
Debbie