[jacq10]

So finally after a very long time, i went to my first appointment with my new T. Now i had known before i went in there that she would ask me alot of questions in order to understand me etc. But once i got in there... its like I froze. She kept asking me all of these questions that i didn't know the answers to, and the whole time my face was beat red because i was SO embarassed. Why was i embarassed? Got me. It was so bad though because i felt like such an idiot ... i want to go back because i want to move forward .. but its almost like i am so scared to open up because i'm scared of what i might find. This was so much more intrusive then with my counsellor at my old school... i want her back

[Hopefull]

The first appointment is the hardest because the T has to assess/diagnose the problem. The next appointments can be more at your pace. Please try a few more sessions with the new T before changing Ts. I always hate the first session more than almost everyone of the others. I hope you can find a way to make therapy work for you.

therapy should be intrusive, its there to help you search your inner self and remove all the negativity, and its never easy.

you feel embarrased because you are being asked to open up to a complete stranger, but after a few sessions, this will ease up and you will feel comfortable in opening up.

dont be scared of what you may find, it cant hurt you, not again. you are in safe hands with a therapist.

take it easy and slowly, your therapist was only asking questions to establish what areas needed work and what you were comfortable abot, because the areas you are comfortable talking about are areas that arent as important or urgent as the ones you cant open up to. do you see what i mean. basically, the subjects you cant answer are signs to your therapist that these are the subjects to concentrate on, so you actually did them a favour be being emabarrased. i really hope im making sense, its hard to explain!

well take care and stay strong

simon

[jacq10]

Thank you hopefull and Simon. I realise that this is what happens most of the time for the first meeting ... i just its just frustrating and it took alot out of me. But I am going to keep going back because i know you are both right. I realised that before .. i guess i just needed to hear it from other people .. so thanks : )

no problems jacq10, and i hope you ffeel better soon

simon

[Perna]

It might make you feel better, jacq if you start your next session with how embarrassed you felt in the first and how uncomfortable it was for you. Getting it out so your therapist knows that you know that she knows, etc. :-) could be a little easier, is about the relationship between the two of you (which is what therapy is about too, not just your past) and might help her and you work together more comfortably. But it will give you a little practice talking about things that are uncomfortable without itself being particularly uncomfortable? When I get embarrassed and feel like I've maybe done something "wrong" I like to get it out in the open so the other person doesn't think I was deliberatly being difficult or am always like that. Usually T's are very reassuring in that situation which always makes me feel better.