Need some support in sending email

Hey all -
I've been really struggling lately, and even scheduled an extra session with my T last week.

I just wrote an emotional email to my T, kinda detailing how I'm feeling right now. I struggle to reach out, so my T strongly encourages me to send her emails when I feel moved enough to write to her. I think I need to send this email to my T, but I can't hit send. It's sitting in my drafts folder, and I'm just scared to send it. I don't want to seem like I'm seeking attention or trying to be manipulative. It's exactly the opposite...I abhor attention. I just wanted T to know what I'm experiencing, as it will make it easier to bring it up in session if I send her an email first. I know I could just keep it in my drafts folder and read it to T during session, but there's no guarantee I will. I'd rather send it...but I need some support in doing so.

Your T knows you struggle to reach out so she's not going to think your looking for attention. When I struggle like that I just force myself to hit send before I can change my mind. Just do it quick and send it to her. It sucks I know but it will feel better once you do it and the next time will be easier

I completely understand but if your T told you to do it, then I think it comes down to trusting your T knows what you need. I sent my T an email this week for the first time and told him not to respond. But he did send a brief response and told me he was glad that I sent it

I feel like hiding my face in shame - that I would need to write my T like that is appalling to me. What must he really think? I'm so pathetic and needy and wrong and just yuk ...and he is going to think I'm trying to manipulate him and just trying to get attention and he's going to tire of me...blah blah blah and on and on it goes. So I definitely get that.

I have tried to commit to trusting my t knows what I need. I need connection. I'm lonely. I'm lost. I picture it as though I'm lost in a hole within my mind and T is on the outside just trying to get in. But I won't let him. It's not on purpose at all - just part of the work. Maybe try sending it and see where it leads? See if you can allow your T to help you out of the hole?

Thanks guys - I closed my eyes, held my breath, and hit send. Then, kept my eyes closed and counted to 30, so the undo option would go away and not tempt me!!!

Glad you found the courage!

That's awesome. Good job.

Well done blessed
You did the right thing sending it and I hope t gives you the support you need

Good job!!!!! I'm so proud of you. Keep us posted on what happens :-)

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

glad you got it sent!

That's awesome! I'm proud of you

Thanks guys. Now, it's a waiting game...wait until my appt on Thurs to discuss the email with my T. I'm not sure if she'll reply. I didn't ask for one specifically, and usually, if she's going to reply, she does so in the mornings. No reply this morning, so I may not get one. I'm actually okay with that. I said what I needed to, and I know we'll talk tomorrow.