[Raging Quiet]

And I'm not sure how I feel about that.

I've known her for 6+ years. She said she only can see half of the picture and my relationship at home needs some help. It's for me to tell h about my sister in a 'safe' environment - she said we could use her living room, instead of her therapy room so it's still 'my area'. She said she doesn't do it often (see couples)

She's worried I'm not getting the right support, especially with this new crisis. I think she's frustrated with me and she'll be retiring in the future so perhaps she wants to meet my h to.

H said he would come (begrudgingly) but I'm really nervous about it.

I don't know if its supposed to be a couples session or what, I don't know how I feel not having a normal session.

Had anyone ever had a t that did this? What happened?

Thank you.

[ScarletPimpernel]

My last T had me bring my fiance in to several sessions...

I don't think my experience will help you too much though. My last T has horrid to begin with. She wanted to meet my fiance because he was my main trigger (still is). Instead, she talked about our sex life. In the end, she stopped seeing me because my problems with my fiance were distracting me from my own problems enough that I didn't need her anymore! And now my fiance doesn't trust anyone in the mental health profession

A while ago my T asked to meet my bf too. I can't actually remember why, I think he said it's something he does in the course of treatment with everyone just to get a fuller picture. I can't fully remember the session now but it went ok. It was basically T just talking to bf for most of it and my bf sharing how he sees things and how I am.

I think you may want to talk to your T beforehand about exactly what is supposed to be happening in the session, if she will simply be there as a third, silent party to the conversation between you and H or if she's going to ask him questions, too. It sounds as if the uncertainty is really hard (it would be for me, too.)

My story is a bit different. In my case, my husband also started seeing my T several months after I started which completely fine with me and if I remember right it was my idea. So, T learned a great deal about our dynamics just by working with us individually.

At some point (and I can't remember how far into the process it was), T had us both come in for more of a couple's session. It wasn't my session or his session that was used for that meeting; it was a session independently run. I think that would be important to clarify with your therapist if missing out on your individual session would be a problem for you.

We have had several joint sessions over the years. Sometimes they've been helpful; sometimes I felt pretty neutral about it, kind of eh. Before your session, I would ask your T for specifically what she hopes to say to him and specifically what her goals are for the session. Don't go blind into it.

[gayleggg]

My H has gone with me to see several of my therapist. We had some good results and some not so good. But the good ones helped him understand my illness alot better and that was a good thing. The not so good ones brought up stuff that will never be able to be resolved on either side and is best left alone.

[ScrewedUpMe]

I would be wary about doing this to be honest...especially as you seem uncertain as to the purpose and what exactly is going to happen.

I once brought my husband to a session and that was okay, although I did feel embarrassed when my husband described how I was but I know it was helpful for my therapy at that time. Several years later and I was in crisis about 6 months ago. H called T and gave me the phone and I talked to her about what was going on between me and H. T then offered to talk to him for me and explain where I was coming from etc. It ended up with H talking to her for far longer than I did and getting very emotional and upset (because he never really talks to anyone about his feelings and finally had his chance and someone listening) and then when I finally got the phone back I very much felt like T was taking his side (because he is more expressive of his feelings and I am good at faking it and covering up). T asked me to look after him. I felt really betrayed and let down and like she had heard one thing from him and was already on his side. It ruined something between me and T and I would now never want to talk to her about my relationship problems. I really wish I had never done it.

I do admit however, that face to face it would have been different as we would have heard what each other was saying. That's just my experience but I would make sure you know what exactly is happening and be sure you are comfortable with it. Good luck

[unlockingsanity]

Based on what you've shared about your therapist in previous threads, I be very careful. Find out exactly why she wants you to have him come and what you can expect during a session with him.

[purplemystery]

When you decide, I'd say it would be helpful to also be clear with yourself about your own expectations going into it. If you expect your T to be "on your side" and it doesn't turn out that way, it could be more damaging.

[doyoutrustme]

I did it once, but I would never just my on t for couples counseling.

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[unlockingsanity]

Raging, what did you end up deciding to do in regards to this and continuing therapy with your therapist?

[Bill3]

Honestly, given everything that you have described here, I'd be skeptical about any request from this t.

[Raging Quiet]

Since I posted this, it's been arranged me and h will meet my t in a few weeks time; I haven't had time to process this in great depth.

[Unrigged64072835]

My H has been in many of my sessions with T. Since our marriage is stable it helps at times when I'm not getting something. (Although there's been times where he and T get into an involved conversation and I'm like, ahem, this is MY appointment...)

Hopefully you can work out your concerns with T before your session with H. I'd be rather uncomfortable not knowing what to expect and end up losing rapport with your T.

[Raging Quiet]

Just an update that this is happening tomorrow.

I'm so nervous.

I think t wants someone to be there after she tells me she's planning to retire.

My h is telling me it will be okay, but I'm freaking out.

[doyoutrustme]

Everything ok?

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