Would you mind your t reacting emotionally to your disclosure during session, any emo

As I disclosed some csa, I guess my body language spoke alot, and she asked, what I was feeling atm, I said nothing, she told me to tell her the truth, so I did.

she told me she was feeling angry at the person that did this, and that I should not carry this shame and guilt, her tone was angry,, she told me she was releasing her, anger, because she is human, she then became sad, she told me she is human too and was showing me, that she was holding my feelings.

very confusing.

I think she was showing you that it is okay to show and express those emotions, that you shouldn't be embarrassed.

I wouldn't mind if my T did something similar. I know it would be awkward because I wouldn't know how to respond, but I also think it might be good for me.

Thanks hazelgirl, I just never had a t do that before, I thought a therapist kept those feelings to themselves.

thats what my t often does when we tell her stuff. it makes me feel better when she shares those things.

This type of approach isn't for everyone and any time. You seem to have got into some very deep work very, very soon with this new therapist. I'm wondering if that may have to do with your feeling of discomfort.

My therapist does this a lot, as do other therapists I know. Personally I find this quite useful. It also lets me know that the therapist is truly present and involved in the therapy. I feel understood on a very deep level, too. But hey, I've been in therapy with the same therapist for 4 years now, so I think this makes a difference.

If my T was to react emotionally to me, I wouldn't know how to respond beyond asking him if he was ok and trying to comfort him... and apologizing. At the same time, I would also be just surprised because I am not used to people caring like that.

My T tells me how things make her feel. I don't mind. One time I caught her shedding a few tears (but she was trying to hide it...the room was dark so I only noticed because she wiped her eyes). I didn't mind. I'd rather her show emotions than be a "wall". If I wanted to talk to a wall, I do just that (Scary thing is I tried talking to a wall...sad, huh?)

Some ts will express their feelings if they think it would be useful to you. I think in your case Sweepy, your t was trying to show you that it was ok and expected to be angry at what happened to you. I am guessing you don't show your feelings or try to repress them? Is that accurate?
Did you feel comfortable with her expression of anger or did it upset you?

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I am not big on the therapist showing me their emotions about what I say. What possible difference is it supposed to make to me how they feel about it ?

I think it is to validate your feelings if you are ashamed of them or feeling like you shouldn't have these feelings.

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Good lord, I don't need a therapist to validate or invalidate anything. It is not like I am going to think something is okay because a therapist said it was.

How was it for you when that happened, sweepy? (I don't think that I would find it positive, but I can't really imagine what it would be like to have anybody react with any kind of involuntary emotion to what I say.)

I am learning not to idolise therapists Stopdog and I admire your ability to think for yourself and question others!

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sweepy this would and has confused me also. I just don't know how to deal with my t anger weather it is for me or at me . I would rather it not happen. I have been dealing with this very thing the last few weeks with her.

That's a tough one. Personally, with my T, I would appreciate such signs of emotion. That said, it's a highly personal thing, and ymmv. (your mileage may vary)

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i agree with what you are saying, its because she took over for my old t, and thinks i am prepared for this, I disclosed a bit of my csa, but im not too prepared, it is why this last session left me mentally exhausted and produced more memories too pop up and more distressed, which i used more coping skills, but still distressed, I did tell her I cant do this weekly, it has only been 7 sessions, to me its only the getting to know you stage.

thats funny, because that is exactly what I did, I immediately apologized, and she said no need to, she went on to explain that it was human nature., but i felt like since it was only the 7th session, i didnt expect that much care.

you are very accurate , i dont express feelings, i repress them, and I did not feel comfortable with her expressions, it confused me, i was not upset at her, but it just confused me.

i felt i had to apologize, like i made her feel bad with my mini story, i felt confused, i was not angry at her,nor did i have any emotions of my own, my problem is i dont connect my feelings of my trauma to emotions, so when i tell a little that i can tolerate telling, i am numb telling it, so when she showed emotion, i was confused.

that crap (sorry) was wayyyyyyy confusing, for a minute there, i thought she was angry at me lol, or the little bit i disclosed was too much, i dont know, i appreciate her honesty and help, and im glad she shows emotion, glad she cares, its just i am not use to people CARING OR SHOWING EMOTION for me, so when someone does this, i go into paranoid mode, especially like you only know me like 7 weeks dude, lol i dont know granite, its like that song " i always feel like somebody is watching me" lol

But it's normal and healthy to respond emotionally to others. I know you haven't experienced that, but it isn't bad or uncommon. She does care, and she is invested in your well-being.

thats what she told me hazelgirl, she said she is showing me that its ok to express emotions, she is showing me her genuine human side.

My current T showed some anger when I disclosed something to her in our early sessions. It felt weird to me. I think mainly I didn't feel it was genuine because obviously she isn't going say otherwise.

With that said, I wouldn't mind now if she showed some emotion.

It can be beneficial in some cases, I think.

I do believe she is being genuine, I really do. I am just not use to this, I am going to keep an open mind about it, because , if I question every little thing, I am not going to get anywhere. Its just maybe the trust is not there yet. I am not use to people caring so much so I doubt everything. What happened to me, in my mind, I minimize it, I guess Im numb about it, so when i speak about it, I speak as if i were speaking about having a chocolate bar, but my body language speaks different, does that make sense to you guys. what i am disclosing as little as it is, with what little courage i have, makes others pissed off at the person who did it, but to me I feel nothing. Yes I know its confusing to you guys.

She seems to be a very caring and gentle person, and for the most part I speak through my drawings for now, even if its not csa, I have problems verbalizing.

*Hugs*

It isn't confusing to me. I understand it, because I deal with the same thing. I do think a part of it is trust, and I think that will come in time.