[HazelGirl]

I don't know if there's a dream section on here, so if so, please move this to that section.

I'm also putting a trigger warning because of some of the content.

Last night, I had a dream about a kid I know from my church who is in eighth grade (about 13 years old).

Somehow (I don't remember how), we ended up naked and were fondling each other. I spent the rest of the dream on the run from cops and feeling so guilty because of it. It never went beyond touching, and he was a willing participant, but this is still horrifying to me. I would never in a million years do something like that. It's so wrong, and I wouldn't ever even want to. I have never had thoughts like that about him or about any of the other kids at my church.

What is up? Why did I dream this? I feel absolutely terrible!

[Mactastic]

I can't help but wonder if this boy represents some kind of inner-child in you and perhaps you feel like a current event in your life is overwhelming/shameful?

I have the same feeling as Mactastic. Here's what I've come to understand in my 2.5 years of doing extensive dreamwork: When we dream about other people they are usually representing some aspect of ourselves, kind of like our psyche has created a movie about our Self but has to use actors to play some of those "Self" roles otherwise we won't pay attention. (I'm no expert of course this is from my own personal experience working with dreams and this is all in my own words so should be taken as only that.) And our dream-makers use people that we know in rl as those actors, sometimes for what part of us they represent (like if I dream about a particular teacher I once had, she represents the "smart" me, stuff like that.) Maybe in your dream this boy like Mac said represents your inner child, or maybe your innocent Self, and something that's going on currently for you feels like it's too much for your innocent self to handle?

I love dream work so much. I'm on the computer this early looking up the meaning of jade because in my dream last night, someone gives me a piece of jade and tells me that I will know what to do with it when it is time, and I am walking on white sand looking for the people I need to be with. I've been a prolific dreamer my whole life and this is why I'm with current T, because she is certified in dream work and we do a lot of it. The first thing she taught me is when you are telling someone your dream, or writing it down, you always do it in present tense, because that is how we dream, in present tense. Kind of helps me keep the dream "alive" (because dream-workers believe that dreams are living things!) long enough for me to work with it and start piecing together what my psyche is trying to tell me. I have learned SO much about working with dreams but alas not enough yet to be able to write anything clearly on the subject. Sorry for rambling!!

[RosaAP]

I would suggest going to dreammoods.com
Type in keywords and several things considered significant because the website doesn't take full sentences. It takes a little work putting together the meanings of the keywords, but I believe that will help you.

[HazelGirl]

Reflecting on what you are both saying, I am 22 and struggling with being an "adult" around my mother, who is emotionally unavailable. Maybe this is me trying to "grow up" that inner part of me that still turns into a child around her? And maybe the fear and the cops coming after me is my mind's way of saying it is scary and difficult and that I feel like I am "breaking the rules" by setting boundaries and enforcing them?

That's the best I have got right now.

[RosaAP]

Dreams are curious things and be careful not to misinterpret what they really mean.
Aside from that, take care!
I really recommend dreammoods.com for you, though.

Like mas said and Artemis everybody in our drama represents us. Is there something about this little boy that you admire or a quality of his you would like to have yourself? I would take a different spin than inner child and say that the adult in you is communicating with the little you, you are trying to tease it out.

To some children represent innocence and in your dream the child is the willing participant. He wants to be older and enjoy adult things!

It sounds as though this inner child is ready to cross over into the adult part of you Hazelgirl.

Sounds like a very hard dream to process, especially since a child is involved. I think maybe the cops represent a part of you that thinks that some part of yourself should be ashamed of this new integration and wants to punish you.


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[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

Like mas said and Artemis everybody in our drama represents us. Is there something about this little boy that you admire or a quality of his you would like to have yourself? I would take a different spin than inner child and say that the adult in you is communicating with the little you, you are trying to tease it out.

To some children represent innocence and in your dream the child is the willing participant. He wants to be older and enjoy adult things!

It sounds as though this inner child is ready to cross over into the adult part of you Hazelgirl.

Sounds like a very hard dream to process, especially since a child is involved. I think maybe the cops represent a part of you that thinks that some part of yourself should be ashamed of this new integration and wants to punish you.


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Things I envy about him? Hmm...well, in some ways he has a very similar personality to me. But he also has an almost ideal childhood. His parents are caring and involved, he is happy and well-adjusted, he is confident and outgoing. Although I'm sure he has struggles, they are tiny in comparison to my own life. My own childhood was the opposite of that in a lot of ways. So I guess I envy that.

[unaluna]

I missed my mona - i was just gonna ask what happened to you! Altho we dont really do that here. So anyway im glad to see you back

Originally Posted by hankster

I missed my mona - i was just gonna ask what happened to you! Altho we dont really do that here. So anyway im glad to see you back

thanks hankster, been busy with me head in the books and living like a nun- nothing new there

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Originally Posted by HazelGirl

Things I envy about him? Hmm...well, in some ways he has a very similar personality to me. But he also has an almost ideal childhood. His parents are caring and involved, he is happy and well-adjusted, he is confident and outgoing. Although I'm sure he has struggles, they are tiny in comparison to my own life. My own childhood was the opposite of that in a lot of ways. So I guess I envy that.

Awh that makes sense, does it make sense to you that the child within you craves what he has and wants to connect with it?
I always wonder why we have such disturbing dreams but the message has to get through somehow!
How do you feel about it now?

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[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

Awh that makes sense, does it make sense to you that the child within you craves what he has and wants to connect with it?
I always wonder why we have such disturbing dreams but the message has to get through somehow!
How do you feel about it now?

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Maybe that's why I chose him specifically to represent a piece of myself. But I think the other description of what is going on right now around me makes more sense for this particular dream's meaning.

I don't feel as bad about it, but it will take me a few days to get over it.

Take good care of yourself and maybe write it out so it's clearer for you! Could yo also talk to your t about doing done inner child work?

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[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

Take good care of yourself and maybe write it out so it's clearer for you! Could yo also talk to your t about doing done inner child work?

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I don't know exactly what inner child work is, and my T is an attachment T. So I'm not sure if she does inner child work.

I am sure she has if she is an attachment t but you probably didn't realise it's a technique many ts use to heal our wounded inner child.
Sounds like you didn't have the childhood you would have liked!

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[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

I am sure she has if she is an attachment t but you probably didn't realise it's a technique many ts use to heal our wounded inner child.
Sounds like you didn't have the childhood you would have liked!

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Oh. Well, maybe we do inner child work and I didn't know it was called that. Whatever we're doing seems to be helping, at least somewhat.

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by RosaAP

I would suggest going to dreammoods.com
Type in keywords and several things considered significant because the website doesn't take full sentences. It takes a little work putting together the meanings of the keywords, but I believe that will help you.

I would suggest this, also. Try the dictionary, and also themes sections.

What I like to do, is to write it all down in a notebook/journal. Then note down the interpretations in the margins and piece it all together.

What our conscious interpretation of what the dream is, can oft be very different than what the subconscious is trying to interpret.

[blur]

hazel, my first thought was that 13 is considered the age of accountability which you probably know is when a teenager is considered old enough to think like an adult and make up their own mind. the term is used in reference to deciding what one thinks about God but i think it could be about anyone and probably about an authority figure in your life. you are fooling around with this kid so maybe there is a part of you that feels you "should" (the cops) be more grown up and not acting like a young teenager. you feel like you are not acting your age. you think you are doing something wrong and are going to get in big trouble for this.

just know that pretty much everything is symbolic in dreams so it's definitely not about the literal meaning of what was happening.

[WePow]

Bless your heart.. I hate dreams like that. My T toldme he has that same type of dream a few times. It is nothing he would ever do. But he said it represented his own inner child. There is a lot there about the basic needs which were not met as achild and learning how to meet those as an adult. But feeling bad or in the wrong for trying to meet those needs.

HazelGirl, the dream had nothing to do with what you would do or want to do-I agree with everyone on that. I liked everyone's suggestions. My first thoughts were that the boy represents an aspect of you, as well. Churches can by symbolic of purity, or values.

Reflecting on what you are both saying, I am 22 and struggling with being an "adult" around my mother, who is emotionally unavailable. Maybe this is me trying to "grow up" that inner part of me that still turns into a child around her? And maybe the fear and the cops coming after me is my mind's way of saying it is scary and difficult and that I feel like I am "breaking the rules" by setting boundaries and enforcing them?

There is survivor guilt too....that sounds like what you are talking about here. It's very common!

[growlycat]

It could just represent another taboo situation or scenario in your life, as if your brain is trying to underscore something with a big yellow highlighter.

I sometimes find I have upsetting dreams and realize I am trying to make myself aware of something I've been glossing over….the shock value seems to spur me into action.

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by skies

HazelGirl, the dream had nothing to do with what you would do or want to do-I agree with everyone on that. I liked everyone's suggestions. My first thoughts were that the boy represents an aspect of you, as well. Churches can by symbolic of purity, or values.

There is survivor guilt too....that sounds like what you are talking about here. It's very common!

Survivor guilt is a big thing. I feel very guilty for trying to "save myself" when the rest of the people in my family are in an emotional sinking ship.

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by growlycat

It could just represent another taboo situation or scenario in your life, as if your brain is trying to underscore something with a big yellow highlighter.

I sometimes find I have upsetting dreams and realize I am trying to make myself aware of something I've been glossing over….the shock value seems to spur me into action.

I'm not sure what taboo situation it could be referring to, though.

[someone321]

As others, I really do not think that your dream had anything in common with your desires etc. Already few times in my dreams (actually the worst nightmares) I was initiating sex with my worst abuser and for sure that's not the thing which I'd like to do even unconsciously... Thus, please do not worry so much, bad dreams just happen from time to time and as you felt terrible after it, probably it represented your fears and not desires...