T Too Busy For Me?

I haven't seen my T in two weeks, and I expected to hear from her asking when I want to schedule another appointment. But I have not heard from her, and I am disappointed. Don't get me wrong here, but I think its Ts job to ask me, since I just cant stop seeing her without proper 30 days notice. So what is she waiting on? I know she is a busy bee, but she doesn't work for one hour every day, and past 6, and not on weekends. Ive noticed with most everyone in my life, if I don't make the effort to talk to them first, I will never hear from them. People just are too busy to make an effort, or must not care anymore about me.

Can you not call her to book? T's will sometimes not contact you first because they want you to be responsible and take the initiative on your own. Could that be what's happening here?

It isn't your T's responsibilty to call you to set up your appointments.

It isn't your T's job to ask you to come back. In fact, supposedly one of the signs of an unethical therapist is one who tries to convince you to keep coming to therapy if you don't want to.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

In your previous posts, GenCat, you state how you talked to your T just a few days ago, you went dancing with her less than two weeks ago and reading from your posts, there has been contact between you and her since then. So, judging from your posts, it seems you can reach out to her in-between sessions and have done so. You state how she is very close to you and has gone out of your way to support you and help you, even if some things seem a little questionable in her approach.
So, why do you suddenly think she is too busy for you and doesn't care much? Why don't you reach out to her and ask her for another appointment?

I sense that somehow there is a little power game going on.. But I may be wrong. A few days ago you said: " I just don't want to see her for awhile" "It's a love-hate relationship between us". I don't remember just now what you post after that was about, but from what I gather, you are yourself not quite sure of this therapeutic relationship. You want her to want you but you also don't want her at all.
You want to be so close with her, yet you don't feel comfortable with everything she does, and sometimes you question her motives.

I feel it's really important to figure out, what it is you really want and then communicate it to your T. It's really not her job to keep asking you to come back.
But of course, you want her to because that would show you that she cares, right?

I think it might be an idea to contact her and ask her for a session and work through these confusing feelings and emotions you have towards her. It feels like there is a lot to work on.

I hope you'll find an agreement with her and that you find the courage to ask her for another appointment.

Does the therapist usually contact you to set up appointments?

I am now aware how stupid I am and hope this thread will be deleted.

I wonder this,too.

If she usually does then I'd be a bit miffed,too, but personally I wouldn't wait for a therapist to contact me for an appointment. I recommend just setting up a regular time and then no one has to contact anyone in between.

Its been amazing to me all my life how this feeling can continuously renew itself its like that deal of filling a hole in the sand from the ocean. Not to get all sunday churchy on ya.

This sounds a bit like a mind game to me ...

It's a delicate issue for Ts when clients just disappear. I agree they should attempt some contact once or twice, but ultimately being in therapy is a very delicate and intimate thing, so if you as the client stop going, an ethical therapist won't send a lot of messages asking you to come back either.

My guess (without knowing your T) is that this has little to nothing to do with her being busy. If you want to keep working with her, book an appointment when you feel ready. Then you can ask her how come she didn't contact you, what her reasoning was (if she had any), and explore your need for her to initiate contact.

Wish you the best.

Just wanted to add my experience...T has NEVER once contacted me before I contacted her. I can email her as much and whenever I like and she always replies thoroughly but never EVER makes first contact, even when we have not set up an extra appointment. Hope you find a way through this.