We don't talk about serious stuff and I want her to.

Last therapy session: the drip from the ceiling, her sisters friend, my cat.... A form I need for outside look at she needs to type up.

I like her but she's flighty, which is terrible for my anxiety. My sister wants me to repair the client-patient relationship, but I don't know. She hasn't brought up what led me to intensive outpatient treatment. I'm floundering. I still get agoraphobia, but in 4 sessions I haven't managed to even squeeze this in. One session all she did was talk about herself. I felt like charging her for my wasted time. My insurance pays most of it, but this is just $50 a month and it's a waste of my time, I feel. Then again, I'm talking to SOMEBODY besides my cat, at least. How do I turn this thing around and at what point do I request another therapist?

You definitely need a different therapist. That doesn't sound like therapy at all.

That's what I told my sister. She feels if I complain, the clinic will never quite treat me the same.

You really have to find someone else. And no, maybe they won't treat you the same. they'll know you stepped up, you simply don't tolerate this (which, imho is the best thing you can ever learn from this situation). You deserve much better help!

New therapist time

Huge warning sign that your T is not a good T. That is a big no no.

Thanks. That was my gut instinct.

Sounds like you do need another therapist. One who is actually doing their job. I know that even the fact that you're talking to someone can be somewhat helpful, but you're in therapy for much more than just talking to someone. If this isn't what you need, I recommend getting a new therapist.

First, tell this to your therapist. Let her know what you want and give her a chance to be the therapist you want.

About specific things you want to talk about, it will be up to you to bring them up. You can begin by saying "Today I'd like to talk about...." and you can do for the next visit by saying "Next time I'd like to talk about..."

You can also say "I like it when you..." and "I don't like it when you..."

You're right, this is your therapy and you want certain things. Since you and your therapist are still getting to know one another (an ongoing thing), this will help her understand what you want because she can't know unless you tell her.

I recently told my therapist of 7 years that I sometimes think she is 'too' nice. Now I love her niceness, her kindness, and I have benefitted greatly from it, but it can be something that gets in the way, too. If the mood in the room is all sunny and happy, I feel reluctant to bring something up that isn't, that doesn't 'fit' the mood in the room. It was not easy to tell her this, but it was a good session because I did. Ironically, she had been having the same thought about herself. So that was interesting to learn, too.