[InRealLife45]

I'm meeting two MFT Interns this week to learn Mindfulness Techniques. But they are therapists in training. Should I disclose to them (whichever one I pick, this week I just want to meet them both to decide) but anyway should I tell them that I have a therapist already and I don't want to use that time with her learning mindfulness and that's why I'm wanting to see them? Or would that be invalidating to them?

It's my instinct to just admit I have another therapist, but I find that admission to always be problematic bc T's are so territorial. But maybe baby T's will be okay with it, so they won't feel such a heavy burden treating me since I already have primary support, in addition to beginning wraparound services pretty soon?

I think if I can use the baby T as an end of week stepping stone (my T m/w, baby T on Friday, and wraparound somewhere inbetween) then my need for e-mail with my T will be greatly reduced or eliminated, leading to less resentment between us, thus letting us move on to real work rather than getting stuck on her unwillingness to provide midweek support and discussing her strangling e-mail boundaries that are causing resentment for ME bc theyre all about her needs and not mine (I imagine shes feeling the same way about me, that its all about my needs and not hers.)

[Leah123]

I take a pretty simple approach, but I learned it the hard way over many years: tell the truth. That's my advice since you asked. I think it will make everything easier and clearer for all parties. Good luck with the interns! Mindfulness rocks even though I don't always find it easy to manage.

[stopdog]

I don't see the point and I probably would not bother telling them. But if you think it would be useful to you in some fashion, them the only harm is if they get all undone about it. I don't find it to be about telling the truth or not. I find it about what part is useful for me.

[Bill3]

Or would that be invalidating to them?

I see nothing wrong with telling them if that would be helpful to you, as stopdog said. Counselors do need to learn and understand that clients may see them for certain specific reasons and the clients may wish to limit the discussion accordingly. That choice is up to the client.

[unaluna]

See, again, power struggle. Who is in control. I admit i am especially sensitive to this right now because my mother keeps contacting me via a third person, reminding me that i have NO RIGHT to live my life as i want. No right at all. She is the queen. Does this resonate at all for you? Ie that you are fighting for control with your t, but really the fight belongs further up the line? Is there no one up your butt besides Asia?

[InRealLife45]

Originally Posted by hankster

See, again, power struggle. Who is in control. I admit i am especially sensitive to this right now because my mother keeps contacting me via a third person, reminding me that i have NO RIGHT to live my life as i want. No right at all. She is the queen. Does this resonate at all for you? Ie that you are fighting for control with your t, but really the fight belongs further up the line? Is there no one up your butt besides Asia?

I don't understand what you mean? How that applies to this situation?

And no, no one but Asia is up my butt, but that's probably bc she's so far up there, no room left for anyone else.

Originally Posted by InRealLife45

I don't understand what you mean? How that applies to this situation?

And no, no one but Asia is up my butt, but that's probably bc she's so far up there, no room left for anyone else.

This is really rude.

[InRealLife45]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

This is really rude.

lol, I think Asia can handle it, she knows I'm joking. She said worse to me not two minutes ago. But I apologize if you are offended.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

This is really rude.

Sorry me too, this is a refer back to some posts from this weekend. Kinda of a pre-emptive strike. Anyway, to answer IRL45's question, who harassed you in your past? Who tried to control your life? If anybody.

[InRealLife45]

Originally Posted by hankster

Sorry me too, this is a refer back to some posts from this weekend. Kinda of a pre-emptive strike. Anyway, to answer IRL45's question, who harassed you in your past? Who tried to control your life? If anybody.

Lol. Everyone.

[blur]

maybe the question is will these Ts want to just do mindfulness techniques or will they also want to delve into other issues in your life. will they be willing to only teach you mindfulness? i have no idea how that works thus my question.

[InRealLife45]

Originally Posted by blur

maybe the question is will these Ts want to just do mindfulness techniques or will they also want to delve into other issues in your life. will they be willing to only teach you mindfulness? i have no idea how that works thus my question.

Just met baby T #1. She was sweet...not sure she's really for me, though. You're right, blur, she only wants mindfulness to be "a small portion of the work" and prefers to focus on our relationship instead, and I have zero interest in doing that. I want to gain mindfulness skills and that's it. Maybe do art therapy. But in not bonding to her.

Meeting baby art t in friday, maybe she will be better. Problem is I can only see her three times before she's off on maternity leave not returning till mid October.

[Bill3]

What if you told baby T #1 that you want to focus strictly on mindfulness?

[blur]

Originally Posted by InRealLife45

Just met baby T #1. She was sweet...not sure she's really for me, though. You're right, blur, she only wants mindfulness to be "a small portion of the work" and prefers to focus on our relationship instead, and I have zero interest in doing that. I want to gain mindfulness skills and that's it. Maybe do art therapy. But in not bonding to her.

Meeting baby art t in friday, maybe she will be better. Problem is I can only see her three times before she's off on maternity leave not returning till mid October.

oh, that's great that you're seeing an art T this week. even if you couldn't see her regularly now at least you can try it out and see how you like doing art therapy. good job getting out and meeting with new Ts.

[InRealLife45]

Originally Posted by Bill3

What if you told baby T #1 that you want to focus strictly on mindfulness?

I couldn't possibly have been more clear that I only wanted to learn mindfulness techniques.

She in turn was very clear that that's not how she operates, the mindfulness is not the end all be all, she likes to focus on the interpersonal aspect, person centered therapy etc.. I am so not interested in that. I'm really just not.

[Eliza Jane]

I took a mindfulness class through our local (medical) hospital. Anything like that in your area? It was very intense and really thoroughly taught us the concept.

[Bill3]

I couldn't possibly have been more clear that I only wanted to learn mindfulness techniques.

Good job.

She in turn was very clear that that's not how she operates, the mindfulness is not the end all be all, she likes to focus on the interpersonal aspect, person centered therapy etc.. I am so not interested in that. I'm really just not.

I wonder if there are other ways to study mindfulness. Or if art therapy might be sufficient for now.

ETA: Cross posted with Eliza Jane.

[stopdog]

I think it is good you found out right away she was not the one for you. Good luck with the next one.

[InRealLife45]

Originally Posted by Bill3

Good job.

I wonder if there are other ways to study mindfulness. Or if art therapy might be sufficient for now.

ETA: Cross posted with Eliza Jane.

I have loads of books and recordings but I don't think I'm doing it right bc my brain just doesn't stop. Ever. It doesnt calm me.

Originally Posted by Eliza Jane

I took a mindfulness class through our local (medical) hospital. Anything like that in your area? It was very intense and really thoroughly taught us the concept.

Never considered that, I'll look into it. But the place I went to today to see baby T is primarily a mindfulness education center, so I can just take classes (group setting) instead of individual counseling. No big deal. There's even a 6 hour intense mindfulness course for $60, and a weekly women's mindfulness class, they all start next month bc they're moving buildings this month.

[iheartjacques]

I wouldn't tell. Not right away anyway. Let them do the work lol

[InRealLife45]

Lol I told a little white lie. ie half the story. I said I was still seeing her but that my insurance had set an end date to transition by. Which is the truth just not the whole truth bc I got an extension

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