[sweepy62]

Today was the yearly Autumn and Arts festival , my first time going. Even though I have been feeling unmotivated , I went because they were having 100 artists from different states showing Thier paintings. Other arts as well.

I went with a friend, I sat in front of a band that was playing. And I look at the table in front of me, ( they were like patio chairs) and my t and I guess her sister, they looked alike, sat down.

She didn't see me, I had been there a couple hours, so I was ready to leave. I was pissed because, she never returned my call from Wednesday and because, I told her I was going to this event, and she was happy for me. But at the same time told me she never heard of it.

I walked up to her table and said, hi t, I just wanted to say hello, she seemed happy and said hi sweepy I hope you are having fun. I said yes and thank you. The person next to her said we come every year.

I think I'm more pissed she didn't call back. Upset a bit too that she said she never heard of this festival .

Omg

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[Inner_Firefly]

How strange, if I were you I would be upset and confused, too. I hope you get a chance to ask her what was going on.

[doyoutrustme]

Maybe she didn't know what it was called? You should bring it up next session. It's weird.

[granite1]

I would be completely upset . why be dishonest about something so trivial . I would definitely bring it up to her . find out what the heck is going on and tell her she needs to start being honest with you about call backs and silly stuff like this

[MoxieDoxie]

I would leave my T alone to his relax, fun time. They need downtime away from us. They can get stressed and overwhelmed too from life and their job. Maybe she did not want to deal with work so she did not call back as a way of avoiding stress. Does she have to respond to your calls? She new she was going to that festival and if she told you she was going perhaps she felt you would search her out.

[sweepy62]

Granite: I figured if she didn't want me to know she was going, all she could have said to me in session, was that's nice sweepy have fun.

If it was meant to run each other, it would have been ok. The thing is she said, she never heard of it. Don't know what I'm more pissed at, her not calling back , or her lying.

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[PeeJay]

Yikes! I think your next session topic is picked. . .

[sweepy62]

Originally Posted by PeeJay

Yikes! I think your next session topic is picked. . .

I don't know if I care to bring it up, I will bring up the call if she doesn't return my call, I don't see her till th 24th.

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[leggiera]

Sweepy: That would weird me out, too. But maybe there's an explanation, like she didn't know the name of the festival? Or maybe your T's sister goes every year, but this was T's first time?

[guilloche]

I'd be upset too Sweepy. Does she usually call you back pretty promptly? And, I agree... she didn't need to lie about the festival... but I'd try to keep an open mind that just *maybe* she didn't recognize it (as others have said) from the name. Weird, but weirder things have happened. *good luck* - and sorry you have to wait so long before your next session, it's a long time to have to sit with all this!

[Petra5ed]

That's very strange. Trying to think of a possible motive for her lie, and I'm coming up with nothing.

[Crescent Moon]

I'd definitely bring it up. In a non-confrontational way. Like... "Did you get the message I left for you last week?" And then see what she says and you'll know how to go from there.

Then I'd say: "You know, when I told you I was going to the festival, you said you'd never heard of it. So I was really surprised to hear your sister say you went every year!" That way, you're just stating a fact. You aren't accusing her of 'lying,' but the facts are clear enough. You should be able to get an answer.

I think this is too important not to bring up. Like Crescent Moon said, it can be stated in a non-accusatory way. It's too much of a trust issue, not knowing if she intentionally lied or if there was some other reason for not connecting the dots when you told her where you were going.

[lilypup]

Weird but maybe there's a simple explanation. I think we can read too much into things.

[RTerroni]

Cool that you saw your Therapist there and that is fine that you didn't have a long conversation with her if you didn't want to.

[sweepy62]

Originally Posted by guilloche

I'd be upset too Sweepy. Does she usually call you back pretty promptly? And, I agree... she didn't need to lie about the festival... but I'd try to keep an open mind that just *maybe* she didn't recognize it (as others have said) from the name. Weird, but weirder things have happened. *good luck* - and sorry you have to wait so long before your next session, it's a long time to have to sit with all this!

My t , is also an art therapist , and she knew the name, and her friend or relative said "we " come every year, basically as far as the callback , this is like my second time asking her for a call back since I been seeing her.

Last time it took 4 days because she said it got lost in the shuffle. She is very good t, but alot of things have been happening and I have no support.

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[sweepy62]

Originally Posted by Crescent Moon

I'd definitely bring it up. In a non-confrontational way. Like... "Did you get the message I left for you last week?" And then see what she says and you'll know how to go from there.

Then I'd say: "You know, when I told you I was going to the festival, you said you'd never heard of it. So I was really surprised to hear your sister say you went every year!" That way, you're just stating a fact. You aren't accusing her of 'lying,' but the facts are clear enough. You should be able to get an answer.

Hey, that's a good idea without pointing a finger. I will say the person you were with. I'm just assuming that's her sister because they almost look like twins.

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[sweepy62]

Originally Posted by RTerroni

Cool that you saw your Therapist there and that is fine that you didn't have a long conversation with her if you didn't want to.

Yeah, I just wanted to say hi, it was not weird , she was having lunch , like I was. After the band stopped playing, I walked up to her said hi, kept it short , she was nice.

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[JustShakey]

(((Sweepy)))
Your T has been leaving you hanging way too much lately. It's not fair, and you're trying to deal with so much right now too. If I were you I'd straight up tell her that she needs to start paying attention to you or she needs to refer you to somebody who will.

[sweepy62]

Originally Posted by JustShakey

(((Sweepy)))
Your T has been leaving you hanging way too much lately. It's not fair, and you're trying to deal with so much right now too. If I were you I'd straight up tell her that she needs to start paying attention to you or she needs to refer you to somebody who will.

I agree I have been very patient, since I do what I do best, bottle up feelings,its making me and therapy a little weird right now. I want to think rationally and not jump to conclusions, my stressors and her scheduling, its a very good mental health community, a very good one, its branched out into many places, except they are quite far, where I go, I have my pdoc there, there are doctors , nurses ect.. Its just that , I need answers or some kind of reasurrance. T2 returned calls usually fast, she would always ask, if I had anything worrying me. I find that this t in the beginning, always asked, always was reasurring, called without me even calling her. Now its not the same, and my mind wonders, was it to just get my trust or to open up. I do like her, she is very good at what she does, but there are inconsistencies.

[guilloche]

Originally Posted by JustShakey

(((Sweepy)))
Your T has been leaving you hanging way too much lately. It's not fair, and you're trying to deal with so much right now too. If I were you I'd straight up tell her that she needs to start paying attention to you or she needs to refer you to somebody who will.

This. So much this! Oh Sweepy... I'm sorry, I know it totally sucks to find someone that is a good T, and a good match... but just isn't able to give you what you need. You deserve so much better... a T that can actually fit you in to a normal schedule and not make you wait weeks to see her, a T that can return you calls in a reasonable amount of time.... I'm sorry, "got lost in the shuffle" is just so nowhere near appropriate in my book for a therapist to say about a phone call. That's just crazy. This is her job... she needs to be organized enough to not LOSE PHONE CALLS "in the shuffle".

(((Sweepy))) I'm sorry... hope you guys can work it out. I guess I just wanted to affirm that the things you want from her are NOT crazy requests.

[Ford Puma]

Believe it or not I was in a situation like that myself today. A photo exhibition. T did nothing wrong but I blundered 100% from the moment I stepped in to the room. A photographer was taking T's photo just inside the door for the press or something. [T organised the the exhibition herself for the public.] So I had to stop and wait. 2 minuets later I just about managed to walk up to her and say hello. I was looking at the photos on the table rather than T. She said something to me along the line of if I wanted to get involved with photography. Its a serious pass time of mine. She know about that, as she know I was attending the event. I did not hear her right though as the crowd was murmuring at full speed. [I ware hearing aids] All I said was... 'I may' in full grumpy tone. About 15 minuets later while walking around the room I moved again on to some of her work a few folks came up to her and started talking to her. She picked up the photo I was looking at to show them. It was at the other end of the table away from everyone and all I could think was she picked it up on deliberately to annoy me. I turned and walked away and went home. Why I did not just stay calm and take no notice. Why do I take ever small thing so badly. I dont like it when I do silly things like that. Most folks would just talk and say something... am I right.

[sweepy62]

Believe it or not, at this point, I am waiting first to see if she returns my call. I will be upset if she does not. I need some type of reasurrance to the questions I left her on the voicemail, before I go in to the next session. I dont want to start the next session upset. Then I will tackle the next issue, the festival. She has been honest so far. I dont get this.

[Ford Puma]

I feel bad for you sweep, I do hope that T at least shows you the respect you deserve and provides you with a justifiable answer. Try not to be too upset if T takes a while to get back to you though. They all take their time at getting back to us even when they know we are in a right muddle about something. Half the time it looks as though they dont give a fig and half the time I think they are laying down some kind of psyco babble challenge to us. Hope Monday starts well for you.
Ford.

[Aloneandafraid]

Thinking of you Sweepy. This is weird and upsetting, especially with the scheduling issues. I think you deserve better, much better. This would really upset me. Take care Sweepy. It is a long time to wait until your next session. Take good care of yourself. Xxx