One of my problems, always, when trying to continue going to therapy is I worry about the money aspect of it... I guess I have this inherent distrust of medical professionals when it comes to money, because I think a lot of doctors will prolong medical visits or overprescribe medication for the monetary benefits...
I know this should not apply to therapists... but really when you think about it, many of them make good money! It's hard to trust that someone is really trying to help you get better when their income relies on your dependence on them...
With my insurance covering certain therapists, it's not so very expensive for me to go, but it's still a burden on an unemployed college grad.
I believe people who provide a service should be paid fairly. I also believe that it may be tempting to draw out that service for longer than is necessary... and with therapy, who can draw the line? It's not like a broken bone, which will heal and then require care and strengthened muscles to support it...
I just wonder, if I can't trust a therapist to tell me when to stop therapy, who can I trust? Clearly my own judgement hasn't done too well as I've been stuck in a rut since about a month after stopping therapy this last time...
Also, I tend to cry in therapy a lot. I think this is actually a habitual thing, because it often happens when I'm embarrassed or even at the slightest trigger of a bad thought. I think that a good therapist might have tried to adjust this behavior so we could get to the real emotions and thoughts beneath the tears. Neither of my former therapists ever suggested doing such a thing. I think I told both of them about this phenomenon, but they attributed it to real sadness, as opposed to being a hindrance.
When I cry in therapy it feels like a waste of time, and if they didn't want me to stop crying, isn't that proof that my therapists were trying to elongate the number of sessions we had together? If I cried all through one session, then clearly I'd have to come back the next week, whereas if we actually used the time to solve problems, maybe I'd heal something!

[Favorite Jeans]

The way I see it, it's up to you to say you're done and stop therapy, not up to the therapist to decide. If you want help to stop crying so you can talk more, ask for it. But you might just need to go through a period (two months? Two years?) of crying a lot and learning to accept that crying is what you need to do. It's not a race.

[ScarletPimpernel]

If you feel that there is a benefit to crying, then it's not a waste of time. Crying can be a great way to express emotions and communicate your pain.

[Froggy57]

I have a pdoc, but haven't had a therapist in years. I would go back if absolutely needed, but my pdoc supports me. I cry with my pdoc every time I talk about anything on an emotional level. It is a given that I am going to cry even though I don't do it regularly outside of therapy. It use to embarrass me, but I am actually a sensitive person who feels things deeply. I have learned to accept this about myself, rather than try to change the very nature of who I am. It is not an issue, so I don't make it one. Other than making sure there is a box of tissues in the room, we are too busy concentrating on the subject at hand to notice my tears.

I strongly believe that you will know when you no longer need therapy. There isn't a right or wrong about it. I was once criticized by a doctor because I had been in therapy for ten years. She told me that I just wanted a mommy. I laugh now, years later. If it is growthful, keep doing it, and if it no longer moves you forward, let it go.

[JaneTennison1]

There is healing in crying too. If that is all you did then it probably wouldn't be helpful to move on but sometimes you need to cry and mourn what was before you can heal what is.

[ThisWayOut]

I'm sorry you ate feeling that therapy hadn't really been helpful. Outside of a brief therapy model, many are meant to take some time. Ultimately however, the time frame is up to you. If you feel as if therapy is stalling, you might want to talk to your therapist apt it. As said above, if you don't want to cry through a session, bring it up with t. At best you can come to an understanding of your expectations for therapy. At worst, you can agree to find a new t.

The thing they underscore in school is that a therapist/clinician is one of the few professions that would prefer to have their client-pool dry up. I know it's not true of all therapists, but most are not going into it for money.

(Also, I agree that crying can be healing. I wish I could actually cry).

[lozza89]

Like others have said it is ok to cry and it can actually be quite theraputic. It doesn't matter if all you do is cry, it just means that thats what you need at the time. Thinking of you

[Abe Froman]

I truly believe my LPC is in it to help people. His rates are very reasonable and I've asked him for extra time and he gives it to me regardless of what insurance covers. We constantly go an hour and fifteen to an hour and a half until I have a good stopping point or if he has to go because of another appointment. But we schedule my times on purpose so that if we run over the standard hour it's no big deal.

Thanks everyone! I realize that maybe I need to explore and shop around to find the right therapist for me... Also maybe the crying doesn't have to be an issue... As long as we talk things through.