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#26
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I saw a craft stall where you can have words carved on stones so I spontaneously got 3 for my T 'Mindfulness' 'Congruence' and 'Empathy' which are three of his core principles and I know he likes that sort of thing because he (or possibly his wife whom he shares an office with) has some pebble ornaments and a picture of pebbles on the wall.
I am a bit nervous of giving him them because we haven't discussed boundaries around gifts so I might bring up that I got him something small and inexpensive first and see what he says. Worst case scenario his boundaries won't allow it, and I will have 3 pretty stones that remind me of my T. Win win! |
![]() Inner_Firefly, ThingWithFeathers
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#27
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I'm terrible at this sort of thing. I've never exchanged such things with doctors or therapists.
I have an understanding with friends and family that gifts (including cards) may not be affordable and therefore are less likely to be given. It's the time spent together that counts.
__________________
* Panic Disorder w/ Agoraphobia * Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder * Hoarder * Fibromyalgia * Major Depressive Disorder w/ Recurrent Major Depressive Episodes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I exist here. I must learn to walk in this world." |
![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#28
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I've had several therapists over the last couple of decades and I've always given them gifts and sometimes even birthday gifts. I don't think therapists mind.
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![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#29
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I think its hard to get a gift for someone that u don't know personal information (favorite color, animals, family etc). I give my T a gift every year. I known her for 4 years. This year I'm creating a book for her. The company draws 2 characters - 1 me and 1 her. I edit the text on each page. So one page I can say "you are supportive" and then text can be coming out of 1 or both characters. I'm working on it now. I really like it. I have 50 pages already. I hope she likes it. I made some pages funny and some phrases coming from her character exactly what she says to me.
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![]() Inner_Firefly, ThingWithFeathers
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#30
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Christmas and my birthday are both very hard for me and after 3 years of trying to wish me a happy christmas I think he has given up. Besides christmas is a christian thing and I am religously confused.
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![]() ThingWithFeathers
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![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#31
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That's lovely! Did she appreciate your painting? I gave my t a water colour and pastel I made last holidays, she was really sweet about it - she wiped a year from her eye.
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![]() ThisWayOut
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#32
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I think a piece of art is a beautiful idea!
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![]() ThisWayOut
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#33
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Is that because you share similarities with Sheldon? lol!
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#34
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Quote:
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#35
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Quote:
![]() ![]() And it was very sweet of your T. Holiday gifts feel like too much of a family and friends thing for me to want to give anything to my T for Christmas, but after his summer holiday this year I gave him something I'd made for him during the summer. |
#36
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Quote:
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#37
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I will give T a gift for Christmas. I have been seeing her for two and a half years and have given her a gift on Christmas both Christmases. I spend around $100. The first year it was a basket full of things to help her relax like warm socks, classic movies, gourmet coffee, chocolate, popcorn. Things like that. Last year, I commissioned a painting from a local artist, who's amazing, for her new office. She loves elephants and it was a mother and baby elephant. I don't know what I'll get her this year. I'm mulling over a few things. I want it to be connected to who she is and not just something you would give to just anyone. I want her to know I made a special effort because she's important to me. I also anonymously sent her flowers when her she when her father had only a few days to live. However, I barely sat down at my next session and she asked point blank if it was me. She said she just had a feeling it was.
The way I figure it, we always get our mailman a $25 gift card and he usually doesn't speak to me all year and if he doesn't come to work, I still get my mail. I see her twice a week plus have completely open email contact and I can't have therapy without her. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
*********************************************************** I wish I was a better elephant. |
![]() brillskep
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![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#38
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No gift, she has made it clear it's not within her boundaries. If I make it or its free she'll take it. A card? Mayyybe. I don't want to overstep.
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![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#39
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Quote:
I do know she loved the show... Big Bang Theory came up because I was describing connected to a neurotic thing that Sheldon did on the show the night before (The episode was "The Closure Alternative;" Amy was playing tic-tac-toe and erasing before he could win.) |
![]() ThingWithFeathers, ThisWayOut
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#40
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I'm planning on giving my T a gift. There's a book that it's long and complicated to explain, but he would find it neat. It was $10 and it's therapy related and I know that it would be appreciated. I've had a rough go of it this year and he's made special accommodations for me because of my distance to the clinic and my husband's work schedule.
I'll include a card or something and be like, "Thanks. Merry Christmas."
__________________
It's a funny thing... but people mostly have it backward. They think they live by what they want. But really, what guides them is what they're afraid of. ― Khaled Hosseini, And the Mountains Echoed |
![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#41
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I bought her a book on medication/pills. She had a book that was a little old, and she jokingly said..."if one of my clients buys me a better book, I will comp them a few sessions".
I bought a book for her that is awesome, she was kinda shocked and felt bad taking it. I said don't worry about it. She did comp my co-pay that session (basically the same cost as the book). Oddly enough I came out with my transference issues with her. haha
__________________
I'm her...new...cool...meat. She pops the trunk, and she removes me, the machine takes pictures of us, and my jaw and my teeth hurt, I'm choking, and gnawing, on the ball....and just before I come to, I move to the back of the car, she makes me touch the machine, new murderer. Soon I'll let you go, soon I'll let you go, so she says. |
![]() brillskep
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![]() brillskep, ThingWithFeathers
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#42
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Quote:
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#43
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I think itīs a really nice gesture to give something to your T, a small thing like a note or card. As I myself easily feel the urge to do such things (or felt, I was terminated) I want you to really think about why you want to do this in the first place.
I donīt know you or your T but as some kind of "varning" I want to tell you that thereīs a risk you wont get that appreciation as you want. You will most likely get a "thanks" put perhaps no comments to the gift. I think itīs important to ransack if you do this to come closer to your T on a personal level, that is seeing more of her personal reactions to a card, a note or so on or if you just want to give her something because of the good work sheīs done. I personally gave my T some extra money, like a bit larger fee for one session, because she helped me with a thing that was kind of outside the ordinary therapy and in that case my appreciation had a clear "why" so to speak. I donīt think itīs wrong at all to give a handmade card or such to your T but I donīt want you to be disappointed if your T will react in a strict "not crossing boundaries" kind of way, if she has such an approach to clients giving her gifts. |
![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#44
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If you are worried about your T's reaction, why don't you ask him/her ahead of time. I did that with my T and Pdoc. T said I can give her gifts so long as there are no expectations attached (though I have no clue what expectations I could attach). Pdoc said I can give her gifts so long as it's valued under $25. Both have reacted appreciative towards my gifts. My T keeps one in her office.
I just don't gift for holidays. And they don't gift at all.
__________________
"Odium became your opium..." ~Epica |
![]() ThingWithFeathers
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#45
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I think I am going to ask my T if she will accept a card or not. I don't want to freak her out...
__________________
I'm her...new...cool...meat. She pops the trunk, and she removes me, the machine takes pictures of us, and my jaw and my teeth hurt, I'm choking, and gnawing, on the ball....and just before I come to, I move to the back of the car, she makes me touch the machine, new murderer. Soon I'll let you go, soon I'll let you go, so she says. |
#46
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I don't think i'd give her a holiday gift. Though if I found out her birthday I would
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#47
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I have never given my T a holiday gift and will not do so this year either. However, once,, not in conjunction with any holiday, I made her a hand-made card to thank her for her support and care over the course of our therapy relationship. Last week, for my 30th birthday, T texted me in the morning to say happy birthday and gave me a small gift (that she did not have to pay for). I think, for her birthday this coming year, I will write her a heartfelt letter. I think those gifts are more meaningful than anything store bought. I also think giving small gifts only infrequently makes them mean more when they are given. I've been with my T four years and she has given me one gift, and I have given her one gift.
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#48
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I was going to either give her a card or tell her how much I appreciate her. That has somewhat changed as I told her how much I appreciate her at my last session and she told me several times that I didn't have to say that and she knew. Today I'm going to ask her why she couldn't just say "thank you". Her response may change my plans...
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#49
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No, since I'm not much of a gift giver. Anyway, she doesn't give me gifts and even wish me a Merry Christmas.
__________________
Dx: Didgee Disorder |
#50
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I gave my therapist a beloved family recipe and a jar of homemade preserves. Do those count as gifts?
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