[MrPink182]

Instead of dumping my old T entirely, I may just tell her I need a long break, and I may be back (that is, if the new T sucks)

This is precisely what I am telling my T tomorrow. I have no idea if or when I'll be back but I think the idea of definitely never seeing him again would be too much for me to take at the moment. So I can't answer your question but wanted to let you know you're not alone

[doyoutrustme]

I took the summer off, and re-started. It helped pull me out of a rut.

I've taken months off at a time. It was never a big deal to my therapist so long as I was doing it mostly because I was feeling pretty stable. I haven't seen my therapist now for over 5 months and I have no idea if or when I will go back. It's totally up to me and he's fine with that since I'm doing well. I may actually be done with therapy finally. Yeah me! It was a LONG time coming.

[Xenon]

Yes, people do that, and that should be fine. I saw my current therapist for a while last year, reached a point where I didn't know if I should continue, left without booking another appointment and eventually went back to her after a seven-month break. I didn't "try out" any other therapist during the break, but she asked me if I did and I got the sense that she would have been perfectly okay with it if I had.

I would just ask her if it would be ok if I took a break from T , and if she says how long just say few months , that way if it dose not turn out good with the other T you can go back to your old T or find another one .
Just don't give her a set day so that way she wont be expecting to her from you on that day .

I've done anything from a few weeks to six months . . . and one break was just short of a year. My former therapist was fine with any amount of time that I decided to take. She always welcomed me back. I understood, however, that if she wasn't able to fit me into the rotation quickly, I'd have to wait a few weeks to a few months before a slot was open. I considered myself very lucky that she was always able to squeeze me right back into the rotation the week following my request to return for a bit more work.

I cancelled an appointment with my new therapist a month and half into our work, telling her that I'd decided not to continue with therapy. After two weeks, I called and asked to reschedule. She called me back immediately and fit me in the following week. It's been tough to stick it out, but I am determined not to walk away. We're ending our fourth month. My "breaks" have never been about trying out other therapeutic connections so your situation is a little different. When I took a break, I wasn't in the least bit interested in continuing with therapy.

[roimata]

1-3 months at a time after so many consecutive months of therapy because I get angry or upset or want to alienate myself for one reason or another. Trying to break that cycle because it's not conducive to my own treatment. What you are doing is different than that though, so I don't think it would be a bad idea.

[stopdog]

I think the longest was 7-8 weeks. I take a lot of 1-3 week breaks. The breaks help me.

[The_little_didgee]

I took 5.5 months off. It was the right decision, because I wasn't fully with it. My distorted thinking didn't allow me to get anything out of therapy at all. It was actually interfering and putting a strain on our relationship. My therapist had no problem with my decision and told me to contact her when I felt ready to return. Our relationship improved after that.

[secretgalaxy]

The longest I've had off was a year and a half. I was really stable leaving as it was summer and the stress of school wasn't a problem. I was actually in a pretty crazy happy mood all that summer. But a month or so before school came in, I slowly went back to my old ways and then plummeted. I didn't go back for a few more months, which was a mistake, and ended up pretty bad. Finally, after my friends were pleading with me, I decided to go back, and my T welcomed me with open arms. I didn't try another T during my break, though, but my T wouldn't have mind, I would guess.

[stopdog]

I tried out other ones during breaks. But I also try out other ones not during breaks too.

[HealingTimes]

I am on a break at the moment. It'll be about 6 weeks.
This is my 1st break and I thought I'd find it hard, but I am really enjoying it. I know I'll go back in January, but I stopped a few weeks ago (against the wishes of my T) and I know its the best thing for me

[MrPink182]

I am on a 5 week break with my original T. She wondered why, I told her that it might help me not constantly thinking about my problems (talking about them once a week). I didn't tell her I was in search of a new T. Now I am torn about keeping both as you see in my other thread...

Hi MrPink, I am also on a break from my T and I had my first session with a new T today. (He seemed nice but very different to old T)
I told my old T that I didn't know I would be back and I asked him how he would feel about me seeing a different T during the break. He said he would be thrilled I am seeking the support I need and that has removed a lot of the guilt around searching for a new T.
I would say try out a new T and see how you feel. Leaving your options open might help to remove the anxiety around deciding what to do about old T.

[coolibrarian]

About 15 months, with the same T.

[MrPink182]

I'm going to really work hard and surprise my T. One of my issues is dealing with weight (I want to lose 20lbs whenever I get to that goal....it would be a total of 235lbs lost which would get me under 200lbs! Another goal is to cut my drinking down. I drink due to having SAD/GAD which is not a good reason to drink! It is one major thing we discuss.

Another is I am going to do her homework each day and meditate for a few minutes a day. I am a little skeptical of this, but so far its relaxing after a hardcore workout.

Nothing makes me happier than after a workout and seeing my clothes are completely drenched with sweat and pride lol. Working out def. builds my confidence up and lowers my anxiety. I want to kick *** for her. I am GOING TO DO IT! The confidence also helps with my stuttering. Stuttering is so hard for me, and its even harder since less than 1% of all adults stutter. I don't know anyone else who stutters. My dad used to stutter, but got over it. He is the opposite of me as far as worrying and having anxiety. He is as easy going as the wind. Lucky bastard! haha

[JaneTennison1]

Forgive me if I'm way off on this, it just sounds like you want to impress your T and then she'll "want" you. She'll care and want to keep you as a "good" client. As well seeing the 2nd T is great but maybe you want T1 to notice you are gone and don't need her. (I know she doesn't know yet, but will one day when you get to say I don't need you anymore)

I might be 100% off.

[MrPink182]

Jane,
I think I need to feel that T1 truly cares about me as a person. She doesn't have to want me, and I don't expect anything like that. I just want her to want to care for me and my therapy.

[JaneTennison1]

Originally Posted by MrPink182

Jane,
I think I need to feel that T1 truly cares about me as a person. She doesn't have to want me, and I don't expect anything like that. I just want her to want to care for me and my therapy.

Have you told her exactly this? People might not respond the way you want if they don't know it's a test. I know she said no hugs, is that the only way to be cared for? Just to clarify I don't mean "want" like a bf/gf partner thing

[MrPink182]

I see hugs as a show of care, but that is just one way of showing care. I can deal without hugs. I think she does care about helping me, but wanting and needing her to say it kind of make me aggravating lol. Maybe I should tell her this next time, but she might worry about my transference and is conflicting with my therapy.

[JaneTennison1]

Well if you are thinking of switching anyway then maybe try it? Sometimes asking for the care you need is terribly difficult because we are so used to hearing no, but it can be worth a try.

[MrPink182]

In your opinion, does me asking her if she cares about helping me get better go into the transference category? Or caring for me as a client? I just don't want her to think I want her to care about me like outside the T room.