Couch 94 - Blowtorches R' Us

I feel ya MKAC, I was going to go to the beach or San Antonio this weekend and I cancelled all my plans because the weather app said rain all weekend! Well it rained last night... Other then that it was fairly mild so I spent my entire weekend cleaning and watching tv.

We keep getting high winds and dark clouds and then no rain. Or nothing and then boom - a deluge.

I am a tad unsettled - the first had the same over the top reaction to a story that the second one did. I thought perhaps the second one was just being a bit theatrical.
Now I am concerned that something I thought most people of my generation in the US had experienced is not as common as I thought.

Does that change how you feel about the story?

Want to run it by us? Of course, you will be getting a slanted sample here.

No - I think both were over-reacting or at least over-acting.

Thanks - I will think about it. It seems they think it more unusual child abuse-ish than I remember it or would have thought. I think most people in my demographic would have had the same sort of situation.

So what are you trying to say ?

I think many of us were in situations that caused us to be in need of therapy, that perhaps the general population might not have been in.

San Antonio had horrible rain Friday night into early Saturday morning, not to mention the highways were probably a mess after all the flooding in the area.

I should have made a better effort to convey my sarcasm

Sorry, Lola. Very tired with a wicked therapy hangover. LOL.

I am annoyed at myself with the number of sessions we have spent talking about talking stuff. Why the **** do I not just blurt it the **** out and get it over with?

Glad I skipped this place

Rhetorical ? No mind...
Sometimes you have to grease the wheels before they turn

Hi couch.

Hey healed, how are you this lovely evening?

Sucky!!
Good to see you around Lola.. Hope you are staying safe in all that yucky weather!

Safe and dry... The whole city was pretty much cancelled today, we had a rain day

The Heavens have finally shined down upon me (insert Hallelujah Chorus here) the truck is fixed! I hope you will all be just as pissed as I am when you find out what killed 2 batteries and stumped three mechanics.

A 50 cent fuse. That wasn't even for the charging system, but I digress.

I can drive again!!

Thoughts prayers and hugs for those in need in pain or floating out there. I'm off for a few zzzzzzzz's.

Fuses are a pain. Glad it is fixed.

Trigger warning for discussion of thoughts of killing. I have trouble with the trigger thing on my phone.



Had a discussion with H tonight about how it still seems odd to me that most people I know now do not think about killing me. It apparently hurts his feelings to know that for years, I just assumed he thought about killing me at least part of the time. Growing up, everyone in my family openly discussed killing me, wishing I were dead, etc. I was in my 40s before it even occurred to me that most people I know now probably don't think that.

I asked T if he really thought his own mother did not think about killing him and he actually flinched. He says no, he is confident she did not think about killing him. He claims most mothers do not think about killing their children. I know I did not think about killing my own, but somehow, I assumed that most mothers did.

Anyway, weird discussion with H and he really hung in there to have an actual conversation about it despite his discomfort. He has really made huge efforts in our relationship.

Glad to hear the conversation went well.

Evening couch. I came home from school-job, ate supper, and laid down for a minute only to fall right asleep and just woke up. Now, I am semi-wide awake. More awake than I usually am at this time of night (if I am not at work). Oh well. I guess I will just find something to do for a bit. Maybe clean, since I still have not. :-P

Pdoc tomorrow. Send him an email ealier today about going off injections and back on oral medication due to my free medication from an assistance program eligibility expiring soon and not meeting the income requirements to requalify now that I have a second job, but still not making enough to afford it out of pocket (since my insurance refuses to pay). No response from him yet, but he may not have read it yet or he may be waiting until tomorrow to address it. I guess I will find out tomorrow.

Had T today, new T asked why exactly I was still in t because she thinks I do not have a strong need for it anymore from what I am saying in the two sessions we have had, but that she will give it a few more sessions before deciding for sure. Strange...I liked my old T, but now I am thinking that she was wanting the money by keeping me in T when I didn't need it. I know insurance pays T jack-squat, so it really wouldn't be that much money, but I still cannot help but think that. Maybe the new T just does not understand how stressful the situations as for me. She asked me to sign a release today to get my old T's records on me, maybe that will shed some light on my situation.

I may be crazy, but I applied for a teaching job today. The teacher I help this year is transfering to another school closer to her home, so there is an opening at my school that posted today. I thought I might enjoy a classroom where administration is supportive and I already know some of the kids (the main problem kids this year are 8th graders rolling up to high school next year, though I've heard some of the current 6th graders rolling up from elementary school are a handful). It's at "my" school and it's with kids I generally like working with, so I thought "why not". Of course I will have to be chosen over other applicants, but applying is the first step. I came home and updated my "teaching" resume to give to my principal tomorrow. I will have to see what comes from it.

Well, I better go try to clean a little since I am awake now. I'll check in later if I am still awake, otherwise I will check in tomorrow.

I found myself arguing with the therapist that my parents approach in the 60s cannot be compared to today's standards of how to deal with small children. The societal standards have shifted. My parents cannot be fairly judged on today's touchy feely helicopter parenting.

Oh wow...I suddenly feel way less abnormal knowing that someone else feels these things

Good for you for applying, squirrel! At least you let them know you are interested. But it will break your pharmacy managers heart!

I hope once your t gets your records, she will understand you better. Hey otherwise just tell her. Especially with your parents so unsupportive - that is hard. And you are still trying to make your way up in the world. Youre not exactly old and settled! My t was also thrilled to hear about your 4.0 and perfect attendance and getting hired right out of your internship.