[RamblinClementine]

I lost my distant, mostly estranged father at the end of April. My brother has been MIA, homeless and travelling across the US, since May 2014. My grandma, who was my primary caregiver, died 10 years ago.

I am sad lately here and there about my brother and my grandmother mostly. Today my therapist told me I need to sob about these things, that I'm not done grieving, but I feel like I have sobbed many times about these things. Who knows best? She is a paid professional but I'm the one experiencing these things.

I think it takes as long as it takes. Sobbing is one tool. But not the only.
I've had to come to an internal understanding of what the loss means to me. And reclaim that part of me that got lost with it.

[LindaLu]

That seems like an awfully pat statement by a T. Did you describe your grieving from the past, and she still said that? People experience and shed grief different ways. Sometimes they don't have a sob in them. Their process is valid. Yours is too.

[Soccer mom]

I'm not sure one is ever done grieving. It definitely gets easier over time but I think certain events in life make us miss those we've lost.

[stopdog]

The one I see tried to get me to cry at appointments. She seemed to think crying with her there was somehow useful. It would not be, so I did not, but some of them think that crying near another person is a help.

[PinkFlamingo99]

Mine told me after a certain point maybe crying usn't helpful. I always had headaches from crying. It didn't help much.

[atisketatasket]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

I think it takes as long as it takes. Sobbing is one tool. But not the only.
I've had to come to an internal understanding of what the loss means to me. And reclaim that part of me that got lost with it.

This.

My father died two decades ago. For the first decade or so, I mourned the person. Then it started to change to a mourning of the hole that had been left in my life by his absence (I was fairly young when he died.) That was a whole second grieving process in itself, which isn't quite complete yet and may never be. I'm wondering if you might be entering that stage with regards to your grandmother.

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

It seems I am told that grieving often takes two years or more, so it may well be that you are not yet done with grief. Only you can tell and you will find out I suppose.