Processing

Do you think the therapist is able to declare when you have processed something enough to stop?

Absolutely not.

I don't think there is an all-or-nothing answer. In general I'd say no but I'm sure it depends entirely on the circumstances. And needless to say there is no one single definition of "processing" in a therapy context.

To me the word processing in therapy doesn't mean anything. I have no idea what they think it is or what they think it means or how it is supposed to be helpful. It seems too restrictive to me for a therapist to say something has been processed.

The poll allows for multiple responses.
That processing does not have a single or clear definition is certainly not a good thing, as I see it.
If true -that they do not all use processing in the same way - perhaps a question is do you and the therapist agree on the definition of processing.

I hate that word.

It certainly is nebulous and gives them a lot of wiggle room

I think it's very similar to the way the term is used in the context of learning. In education "processing" refers to how kids come to an understanding of different concepts. It's more often used if there is a problem - as in processing disorders. Someone with an auditory processing disorder for example, does not process information just by listening - they need visual cues as well.

It's similar with emotions - if someone hasn't processed something yet then I understand that to mean they haven't come to a clear understanding/ acceptance of an event and how that event has effected them (among other things). People process emotions differently as well - some have a very fine tuned and rapid emotional response to events. Others have delayed reactions and may not emotionally respond until well after something has happened, if at all. I don't think a therapist has any way of knowing for sure if someone has really processed something or not. You can guess based on a client's behavior but I don't think they can ever know 100%.

Also hate it when "I" think I've processed something enough, put it behind me, and moved on; and "they" want to bring it up over and over again ad nauseam. Enough with the self-flagellation already!

Sometimes. My T's were not ones to push me into going over and over something if I was not in the place to process something.

The other side of the coin is that there can come a point for me where I can start ruminating and get very stuck; continuing to "process" in that circumstance does NOT help me stop ruminating -- it compounds the problem. It creates anxiety, depression, can affect my sleep and throw me into a bipolar episode. So in that circumstance, my T will work on getting me to move my mind elsewhere, at least until the problem with rumination has let up. He'll at least curtail the "processing" until I am in a healthier mindspace -- and sometimes I find just by getting past the rumination, I realize I don't need to do any further processing; it resolves on its own with needed further processing -- so in essence, he was very much correct in getting me to stop processing.

My T doesn't dictate my therapy. He would never tell me I have done anything 'enough' or that I should stop. If he did he wouldn't be my therapist anymore.

I'm very much in control of my therapy, what topics we focus on and how much. She'll ask questions and make recommendations on what I might want to work on in my life or journaling, but it's all up to me in the end.

I said "some." If the therapist is well trained and intuitive, they may have a pretty good idea when it appears that you have successfully processed a trauma to completion. However, YOU are still the best judge of your own internal state. You need to be the one to decide.

I know there are multiple options, but since I don't know what it means in their language, I could only choose that one.

I am very glad neither of mine has ever used that term. Or "the work." Or anything like that.

For me, "some" was the most accurate choice. But my T would never declare such a thing, only express his perspective/opinion. To me "processing" occurs on multiple levels--cognitive, emotional, behavioral, etc. It rarely occurs simultaneously on all levels in my experience. So maybe in a situation in which behavioral processing is the most crucial, that level takes precedence, but other levels take a backseat. Or the person's psychological readiness determines the level and extent of processing. Maybe physical health also has an influence. Too many factors for anyone, let alone someone else, to make a definitive decision.

Processing, to me, means that I am struggling with, or trying to understand, or come to grips with....something.

I will spend as much time as I need on that subject. It's my time, paid for in hard currency. If I want to stay on one thing for a year, it's my choice.

The therapist may try to convince me to move on, but I never did if I had a bone I wanted to chew.

Sometimes, I think, she wanted to move on and away from a certain point or topic. Usually it was when I was calling her on her bu!!*****. Or when I was trying to get her to admit she had made a mistake.

I voted 'some' ( haha, that's such a US term, I don't think half of UK even know how to use it!' ) And no. I do understand the word as T would use it ( though she doesn't ), a good substitute for me is 'churning and chewing' , she might recognise when a subject is spent if we are just covering old ground. But I think, only I know when I feel okay with something, and it fits into my life narrative, I can look at it, and accept it as part of my story. Then it's processed.

When is anything every FULLY processed?

I can't imagine my therapist deciding when I have worked through something enough and calling it done. She's never presented herself as an authority over me or does anything to take away my personal power.

I find most therapy terms confusing. I did ask for a definition of something once but the explanation just confused me more so I have stopped asking. Apparently "processing" has nothing to do with "the process" wtf?

My t never uses any weird lingo. We just talk like normal people do

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I use different language with lay people also. But it is always better if one has an understanding of the language the therapist uses amongst themselves - it takes power away from them.

When I have asked T how I know I will be "done" with something, he always says when I don't need to talk about it anymore. So I feel like it's my decision when I'm done working through something.