Do you believe that crying is weak?

I dont want this poll to offend anyone. I just want some insight. My T and I have been getting into personal things and just yesterday I told my T that I try to keep calm and stay strong in sessions so I don't cry and how that I can't handle myself.

**I also have this mindset that it's only weak if I cry, but I dont think it is if anyone else cries. Weird I know.**
What are your thoughts about it?

No, not at all. As long as it's not me doing it

For me - yes, it's a weakness. For anyone else on the planet, it's a valid expression of emotion. I do understand that it's probably not a weakness for me to cry, but I've lived with it being perceived as a weakness for so long that it's hard to change that thinking. I'm working on it, though.

Absolutely not. It takes great strength and trust to allow yourself to be that vulnerable and open in front of others. Nothing weak about that.

No it is not a weakness. Crying is good for you.

Same

And, same, I'm working on it!

I don't believe it is a weakness, but I also do not cry easily at all, unless I am drinking

What's weaker? Expressing your emotion through tears? Or... being afraid to express your emotions, therefore hiding them so other people don't know what you're feeling?

Crying is only a sign of weakness in people who think it is, not because of the crying, but because of what they're afraid it will reveal to others.

Mind you, having mastery over your emotions isn't a bad thing either. If you choose not to cry because you don't feel it's appropriate or the right time, it's different from not crying because you're scared to cry.

In other words, crying or not crying is neither inherently weak or strong. The reasons for doing so or not doing so make all the difference.

I don't think it weakness per se, but rarely do I find it necessary or useful. I've never felt better after doing so in anyway.
I get students crying in my office each semester. I've never found it takes great strength or vulnerability on their part to do so but I don't think less of them for doing it.

For me it's a weakness. But I know that it's healthy. I just don't believe that it doesn't show a sign of being weak.

I cry at anything, especially when tired so I don't see it as weakness.

Do you believe that having strong feelings or convictions about something is weak? That is, about something VALUABLE. Like say the Mona Lisa. Or climate change. Or being a vegetarian. Or your family. Or whatever. What great literature have you read that made you cry?

Do I really think so with the best part of my brain? Of course not.

Is there some part of me that nevertheless believes it? Sadly, yes.

Thanks for all the insightful replies !! For me personally I look at it as a weakness because it just shows that I myself cannot handle things. I am a perfectionist so it definitely plays a part in this too. I guess everyone has a different view about it and it's great to read them all !!

I don't think crying is weak at all. I think it's a very strong thing to do, actually.

I think when I was younger I had a problem with other people crying because I associated it with feeling out of control or something dangerous.

As an adult, having met very strong people who are in touch with their emotions, I have great respect for people who cry more freely. I consider it almost a super power. One that I don't really have myself.

It takes a lot for me to break that dam and when I do, it's all out ugly.

Here's the secret though. Even when someone is crying, they're still sentient beings who should be heard and respected. It's not the one who shows emotion that is weak, it's those who are uncomfortable with it that refuse to stay connected to them.

Crying is not a weakness. Its a good way to release your emotions.

I don't think crying is weak, though I am afraid that other people will think I'm weak if they would see me crying. I especially don't want to cry in front of men, because I'm afraid the wrong kind of man will think I'm weak and try to take advantage of me.

God, I've gotten that way myself (so I had to chuckle a little -- not at your expense though).

AnxiousGirl, I probably didn't cry in therapy for several years. I was so self-protective and so embarrassed I guess that I fought it for a long time. That's okay; I suspect it's pretty typical for many people entering therapy.

But over the last 5 years particularly I just have found I cry pretty easily and just have no embarrassment about it at all, particularly not in therapy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a weeping mess nor do I cry all that much, but I do find that I cry easier (if that makes any sense). I don't think I've seen a movie in several years that didn't bring me to tears for some reason (even the silliest movies -- I think some of it may be menopause setting in).

I've learned one thing about myself, often I am the most tense, angry, or anxious when I am on the verge of tears and am fighting them off. I've found a good cry is a good release or vent for me. Once I get the tears out of the way by just letting them do their thing, then I can settle back down again and think and feel more clearly. They serve a really healthy purpose for me that way.

I used to think it was, that I should hide my emotions. That came from my parents. When I was younger, if I cried in front of someone, it was like "Oh no, now I've let them see that." When I cried once in front of my boss, I was convinced I'd be fired. When I cried in front of various exes, I was convinced they'd end things. But I've come to have a healthier relationship with crying. I still save some of my crying for times when I'm alone in my car or in the shower. But I do plenty in T and marriage counselor's office (including today, which my H rated as a "7" on the weepiness scale for me). I think it helps to get those feelings out. For me, it shows I feel safe with my T and MC that I'm OK getting all weepy and snotty in front of them.

I think one can have strong feelings and convictions without crying. I don't see the act of crying or not to have anything at all to do with having those things. I have them, they are not all that useful most of the time, but they are also not related to crying in any way for me either.

This! Same for me. I have anxiety, and I think sometimes when I'm especially anxious, it's because I'm trying to hold everything in--tears, anger, any somewhat negative emotion really.

And I'm totally a weepy mess in T and MC's offices on a regular basis. To the point that I'm like, "Why do I even bother putting on eye makeup when I go there?" (No mascara though!) I used to sometimes apologize when I got really weepy or if I had a handful of used tissues (their trash cans are not very conveniently located!) But not so much anymore. I figure they're used to it at this point!

It is NOT a weakness; it is human. Crying releases chemicals that help you feel better; the chemicals are different than tears of joy.

These answers are amazing! To be honest though I thought more people would agree that crying is a weakness. I guess my mentality is all screwed up and should be fixed but I dont think I can just change that because all my life (20 years) I've felt that showing emotions like sadness or crying makes me weak. But anger... That's a whole different story. I dont think theres a day that im not angry!

I don't feel crying is a weakness. I cry easily. I believe it's part of my temperament.