[Cinnamon_Stick]

you were not paying your therapist?

I am wondering if therapy was free, would your therapist and therapy still be the same. I think mine would be but I am honestly not sure.

[ilikecats]

I think it would be similar, but I would also feel even more annoying. At least now I know what she gets out of our time together, but if I didn't pay her I would always be questioning why she spent time with me and be even more worried that I bothered her too much. But at the same time I would feel like she must really really care about me if she didn't get paid, because there would be no other reason for her to help me than that she just cares.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

Originally Posted by ilikecats

I think it would be similar, but I would also feel even more annoying. At least now I know what she gets out of our time together, but if I didn't pay her I would always be questioning why she spent time with me and be even more worried that I bothered her too much. But at the same time I would feel like she must really really care about me if she didn't get paid, because there would be no other reason for her to help me than that she just cares.

I never thought of that. A therapist who isn't being paid must care a lot to provide therapy.

I've done both. I saw no difference between paying vs. not paying.

[Elektra_]

hi cinnamon i had a free T... for a while she seemed to be interested in helping but after a year or so we passed to fortnightly and i noticed she couldnt care less so i quit. specialists say a person should pay even the minimum we can, is kinda establishing a compromise (i read somewhere). i always felt i went to this association having the same right as others that pay, but they didnt treat me that way.
recently, i found this emdr t and after a few sessions i told her i couldnt pay anymore. she said i pay when i can and that she would not see me bc of that. she has stayed with me like 2h per session so she seems to actually care about treating me and not money. but she even said "i wish i was rich" i was like "wha?" she answer "for me to have a house to help people in need and animals" lol

[stopdog]

Not paying would make them, to me, even more unsafe than I think most therapists already are. Payment ensures we know what the exchange is. Not paying, for me, would make that entirely too grey and uncertain. For me, free would be a favor from a therapist - something I definitely do not want nor would I find safe in the least. (if others do - it is fine - I am only talking about myself here).

[BayBrony]

I think it would make things too hazy. I have paid a reduced fee for various periods of time. But paying some agreed upon amount makes the boundaries clear. I give something and get something else in return. If it was free u think I would be unsure about what I could ask of her etc. And it would not make me think she cared more. As a veterinarian I care about ALL my patients. I'd treat them all for free if I could maintain a business that way. But that's not realistic. I can modify my charges as I see fit but I charge something so that , like me calling my therapist, they don't have to.think twice or feel bad about calling me on a Sunday afternoon

[ChipperMonkey]

Uhm I'm confused.

Is the question about me personally not paying for therapy or the therapist not getting paid?

I've paid before, and I currently have 100% coverage. It makes no difference.

If it was a matter of a therapist not getting paid (by anyone, insurance, government, a program, etc) and working for free, then things might be different.

[ThunderGoddess]

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

you were not paying your therapist?

I am wondering if therapy was free, would your therapist and therapy still be the same. I think mine would be but I am honestly not sure.

Yeah it would be the same for me I don't see money being a changing factor.
If I could go back to my first therapist for free I would in a heartbeat and I'd also still go to my new therapist that my insurance covers.

[PinkFlamingo99]

I saw mine a combination of at the counselling centre at school and free at her private practice for over 5 years. Long story short, we were way way way too close (codependent?) to the poi t where she wanted me to follow her to the city she's retiring in, in a few years. A few months after that, she suddenly decided we could only see each other every 6 weeks at school. I was heartbroken to the point where I didn't think I could survive. I think it was more about her needs than mine. But, yes, for 5 years I felt truly loved and valued. Until I felt confused, hurt, and thrown out like yesterday's trash. In the end, she put me in danger, even though the whole relationship I thought she loved me. I don't think that's love.

I don't pay my current therapist either, but I see her at the hospital where shs is salaried. Not the same thing. It feels way safer. I feel like she cares a lot too, but everything is less secretive and sketchy.

Mine's salaried in a hospital and I'm a subsidized patient paying 50%. I think she would treat me the same whether I paid 100%, or 50% or was subsidized even further.

[magno11789]

With my old insurance I had a small co-pay. With my new insurance they pay 100%. I don't really see a difference. She is getting paid either way. It might be different if they were doing if completely for free.

Around here insurance pays, and T's treat you as though they're doing you a favour by allowing you to come. You're not the customer - you're the patient.

[gayleggg]

I might see mine more often if I didn't have to pay for it.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[AllHeart]

Agreed with ChipperMonkey. If I personally didn't have to pay my T a dime nothing would be different. If T wasn't getting paid period - her services being strictly goodwill - could open up a huge can of worms. Boundaries, rules, ethics could easily be tossed out the window.

[WanderingBark]

I've often wondered this myself. I think at its core it would be the same, but it might add some depth to not have to pay him because to me the act of paying someone automatically takes the emotion and meaning out of the interaction. For example, I pay my medical doctor for tests, I don't feel a deep emotional connection with my primary physician BUT if my doctor performed tests without payment, well, that's different right? To me that shows genuine caring and compassion because the doctor isn't expecting anything in return except for my improved health.

Now with that said, my dear T forgets all the time to collect my payment (I pay him at the end of every week, in person). I often have to remind him and he always says, "Oh yes, that's the farthest thing from my mind..."

[NowhereUSA]

I've had periods where I wasn't personally paying anything but I had insurance paying (and then the rest of the time I had a co-pay). I haven't seen a difference. I mean, I pay for my insurance which is the cost of a small car so... either way, my T sees a paycheck.

Now if he weren't getting paid at all? I wouldn't be comfortable with that. Part of the set up for safe boundaries is the paid piece. I need him to provide a service and I expect to pay for that service. An occasional thing where there might be extenuating circumstances, well I'd have to see the circumstances and I can imagine a few situations where I might accept. However as a regular thing? I do feel like therapy would be impacted. I don't want to feel as though I "owe" my T. He is paid, I am given therapy, the transaction is complete.

[brillskep]

No, it couldn't. I think in my case, I would be much more secure in my attachment to my therapist. I would also feel more helped since at the moment, while an hour weekly isn't quite enough to address my issues, it is a very big financial burden for me. If therapy were free, I'd probably be able to get enough of it and also have one less excuse not to believe my therapist when he says he cares about me.

On the other hand, we're having a big rupture right now and I think he's getting worse as a therapist. Perhaps he's having personal issues, I wouldn't know. If things were truly going well and he were helping me like he used to in the beginning, I would probably feel very guilty after a certain amount of free therapy. I have a very strong need to repay people for their help so that wouldn't work for me in the long run.

[junkDNA]

my T charges me an extremely low rate... a 75% reduction. he cant accept my insurance (medicaid/medicare) i want to make sure my T gets paid. he deserves it. sometimes i feel guilty i cant pay the full fee. i think i would feel even worse if he was working for free bc i can be a pain in the *** sometimes

There is a volunteer counselling centre near me where my friend goes. She qualifies for charity funded counselling for about 25 sessions due to CSA. (I would too actually but would rather pay for a T of my choosing) It works for her but she wasn't given any choice of T. I don't think it makes a difference to her therapy that she doesn't pay. For me, I like the businesslike element of it; it allows me to keep sight of my aims and keep more focus with the direction of my therapy.

[divine1966]

Don't know if a t would be able to provide service for free for too long. I tutor kids for free and for money. I provide the same services either way. But I wouldn't be able to sustain doing things for free for too long. I could see t providing free services for some time in case of crisis but not permanently or long term

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Therapists have to eat too. I've known people who left jobs they loved cuz they couldn't meet their financial obligations. Don't want a good T leaving for that reason. If a good T is comfortable with me paying Y amount cuz of my financial situation when everyone else is paying X amount, great. But let's establish that from the beginning. Also know people who put off or didn't get medical attention or get diffferent treatment cuz their insurance doesn't cover or inadequately covers. Fact of life. Bemoan the fact that I had a religious education that neglected to teach me that having money makes all the difference in this world. A good T does good work for his/her client whether he's agreed to $50 dollars an hour or $500.

[Chummy]

My T isn't paid by me. She has a boss who pays her a salary. She works 4 days a week from 8am to 5pm. She gets paid for that. Doesn't matter if she has 4 clients or 8 clients that day.
I pay insurence and they take care of the payments with whoever handles that at the office my T works at.

I don't think therapy with my T would be different if the payments were different. But if it was totakky for free, so if my T wouldn't get any money for it from anyone... I don't know. I don't think therapy would be different.

[neverending]

I don't pay for any of my healthcare but my providers are salaried. I feel I receive excellent healthcare and with my psych care even though I don't pay all the boundaries etc are there. I feel no different than than when I used to have to pay in the private care industry. However where I am at now if I did have to pay I would not be able to afford the care I need. Also I did chose my t and would change pdoc if I didn't like him. I do have that option.

[PinkFlamingo99]

I feel so lucky to have my psych care free in Canada. And they treat me so well at this hospital.