[sinking]

My Good private T, i met him in 2007. He's always been top priority for me on anyone else, my family too.
I've quit with him for 3 years seeing each othrers only 3-4 times a year.
This year i've had more emergencies that brought me to see him more often.
Next appt is this wed.
But
I am also inpatient in my MHC and i dont know if they'll let me go out and see him.
So i TOLD my Mom about him hoping in some sorta of encouragement.

This is the second time (first being when my family got to know of his existance) that i've put my family first of him, bit still too kind of protect this session.

I feel SO GUILY WITH BOTH.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? DID I DO WRONG?
What do you think??????? Please?????

[Argonautomobile]

I don't know, Sinking, it sounds to me like it's time to put YOURSELF first. Your T and your family aren't in some sort of competition for your prioritization. Everyone just wants what's best for you--or at least they should, and **** 'em if they don't. I don't think you did anything wrong and you don't need to feel guilty.

I hope you feel better soon

[sinking]

Thank you, your words are helping and making me think a lot!
Thank you!

[sinking]

I didnt want to displease anyone.

I'm still torn and regretting it all.

Please any more word of wisdom?

[AllHeart]

As Argo puts it, there is no competition between your t and your family. The goal for all parties involved (you, t, family) is for you to get better so they are trusting you to do what you need to do to feel better. If part of that includes talking to your mom, I see that as a good thing especially since your t was unavailable.

You were practicing good self-care measures by reaching out to your mom. I honestly think your t would be proud of you for doing so!

It sounds like you are in a very difficult situation right now, struggling with so much. I imagine the last thing your t or family members want to see you dealing with is the unnecessary added burden of guilt. You did the right thing. You did not displease anyone. Keep doing what you need to do, because in the end, this fight is all about you.