Could you imagine being friends with your therapist outside of sessions?

No. He told me once that although he respected and admired the work I was doing, he wouldn't enjoy my company IRL.

I am not sure if t and I would be friends outside of his office. Idk.. The way I see it though.. As clients we get T's best. They try to be on, to be understandings and impartial. As a friend we would get a different part of t. So, when I think about I think I get the best of t in our sessions and might not get that as just a friend.

I totally agree with this- the version of my therapist I get in sessions is him with his game face on, working hard to keep all his stuff out of our interactions, and to keep the focus on helping me with my problems. I don't know what he is like as a friend, but the dynamic would be nothing like it is now.

No, I couldn't be friends with my T.

She has many friends and acquaintances, but probably moves in different circles than me given what little I know of her.

I'm also not good friend material, given how I'm in therapy for being very socially anxious, and isolated, with less than a handful of interpersonal relationships.

I figure that if it wasn't for me being one of her patients in the hospital clinic, she wouldn't want to see me.

Distant acquaintances perhaps, if I did happen to meet him in another setting after therapy is over. Having to be forever on guard not to fall into the familiar (but one sided) therapeutic intimacy would make anything more than that difficult. Possibly very hurtful and most likely not worth it.

And of course there are two sides to every relationship. From things he has said I get the impression he is okay with being casually friendly with past clients, but no more.

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Yes. I have thought about it a lot, and I would like hanging out with him. I think it would be fun. I've told him about thoughts like this, yet I don't know what he would think. Maybe he would want nothing to do with me. I wish I knew.

What a terrible thing to say to someone.

that's ****ing awful to say

I'm not sure if you meant could I see being friends with her outside of therapy after we'd started the therapist-client relationship (no, I couldn't) or could we have been friends if we'd met in another context (maybe). I like her and could see enjoying her company if we were friends.

Omg. I would be gone so fast if a therapist said this to me. That's awful.

Big time NO!

That's what I did not want her for

I wanted a mother, not a friend

I LAUGHED. OUT. LOUD at this!

This is one of the reasons I broke down and went to therapy. My sister and a very close friend of mine - I swear they both missed their callings at counselors. I'll talk to my sis way more often than the friend, but like me, she can talk a blue streak lol. So to be able to get a piece of her time AND get counsel - sometimes difficult. I do usually brainstorm with her as well so she gets me at my best AND my worst and by the time I get to worst, it's almost like I'm too ashamed to talk about the stuff that is bothering me so much, which I think it's ridiculous to let it bother me so much, but I can't help it. I just sometimes feel like a burden to them sometimes so it was nice to have someone to help me focus on me Me ME. Now when I call sis it's because I have therapy homework and I ask her to chime in. See if she can jog my memory on anything as we've done a lot of talking about childhood and the past as of late.

OMG! That is horrible. I can totally see myself THINKING that about someone - not everyone is each's cup of tea - but you have to be an a-hole to say it in that way. Sorry you had to hear that. I'd have probably been like, "OH YEAH! Well I wouldn't be caught dead being seen with you with that muffin top and bald spot you got going on. You're not kidding anybody with that combover bucko!"

P.S. That was for effect. My therapist has not a muffintop or combover lol.

Current one and last one, yes. Other ones, no. And that includes ones at the treatment group homes while I was a teenager. There is one that I have stayed in contact with since graduating the program in 2000.

I can't remember if I've answered this thread, LOL. Oh, well here my thoughts on the subject at this moment,

Friends?
Honestly, If I look past my own transference, I can imagine we would get along just fine but I don't know if we would have enough in common to be close friends.

My closest friends have similar lifestyles, hobbies, & professional interests. I don't get the idea that she likes to do the same kind of stuff that I do. Let alone have the time to do it. She has her own life and family. I can't envision that we'd be hanging out much in the same circles.

I do think we'd get along just fine but after a certain point, I imagine the conversation dying away and it being more like a polite acquaintance (with the occasional flare up of intense physical/emotional attraction on my part, lol.)

Never.
not interested.

No, I don't see him as someone I would hang out with outside of sessions.