[sunrise]

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Right now, I would just like to go into T's office and curl up on the couch and have him be there. And just sit in silence. That would really give me a lot of support, just sitting there with him.

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I wrote that last week in another thread here. Yesterday I had an individual session and kind of got to experience that. It was lovely.

It was my first individual session in a couple of weeks, with 2 intervening couples session. It was great to be in his room again with just T and me. Some of you might not understand this next bit or might even get kind of mad if it were you, but during our session, T went over to his computer and began composing an e-mail. It was a confidential message to some professionals on my behalf, related to what we had been talking about, and he decided to do it right then and there to get it done and to be able to run ideas by me as he composed it. So he leaves me at one end of his office in the sitting area and goes to his computer, first asking, “you’ve signed a release for me to communicate with these people?” Yes, I say, I’ve signed those forms 3 times (this is a bit of a running joke between us). He laughs and gestures at the piles of papers and books on his desk, “sorry, they’re somewhere in there—ADD.” And I immediately twin us and say, “that makes me feel better, because my desk looks the same way.” He starts composing, and I try lobbing a couple of comments at him as he types, trying to continue our conversation a bit, but he doesn’t respond. I get the message and let him work uninterrupted. Silence. I pick up a book he has been reading and start looking at it. It’s interesting. I settle back in the couch and read while T clacks away in the background on his keyboard. Occasionally, he runs something by me that he’s written and I comment. I like how he asks for my input. But mostly there is quiet. I am so comfortable. Purrrrr. It’s like I am at home in my living room reading a book and he is on the other side of the room doing whatever. It’s like we’ve been used to each other’s presence for years and happily do our own things side by side. Finally, he is done and reads the whole e-mail to me. It’s long. He’s very verbal and thorough. And he’s wordy to a fault, just like me (twin twin). I don’t have much of anything constructive to say. The e-mail is good. I just enjoy hearing his voice reading to me from something he’s written about me on my behalf. I appreciate that he has asked my input on this and is including me “in the loop” so I know what is going on. (I’m just realizing now, as I write this, that this is such a contrast to how my husband operates, it’s not even funny. Especially since earlier in our session T and I have talked about how recently my H blindsided me with information he withheld and thereby put me in a very awkward position. Could it be that T did the e-mail cooperatively with me for just that reason?)

Composing and going over the e-mail must have taken about 15 minutes, but I don’t feel it was time taken away from my therapy. Sitting in such comfortable, productive silence like that was itself therapeutic. I felt close to him, as we sat there not saying anything, as he did this thing for me, on my behalf. I felt really taken care of.

[dreamrunner]

I'm glad you had a good session.....sounds like a comforting experience.

You said......

"Could it be that T did the e-mail cooperatively with me for just that reason?"

Possibly,its amazing how T's seem sensitive to things that hurt or bother us,even though we may not even verbalize it.

Enjoy your warm fuzzies.....

That sounds beautiful and comfortable. And as long as you are at ease in that silence, then it is perfect. You and your T sound like a great match in the world of client/therapist relationships. Sounds like you have most definitely found "the one" as far as Ts go. Enjoy that connection. You deserve it.

[WinterRose]

Oh how wonderful. I can hear you purr. It does sound cozy and comfortable and comforting. I'm happy for you getting to have that experience.

[LittleMouse]

I loved reading your post and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside as I can almost visualize myself in the same situation, sitting quitly with my therapist in silence. Me comfortanble and quiet him doing something else in the same room! Sometimes when I am really stressed out and can't see him or talk to him I visualize myself in his office in almost the exact situation...quiet, relaxing and totally accepting even of the silence. What a wonderful post...Happy for you!

[MissCharlotte]

It sounds like T was being very supportive during your session and on some level he sensed exactly what you needed.

You two work really well together.

I remember once T was helping me find resources for a family member (we were in crisis at the time) and he picked up his phone and started making calls right then and there on my behalf. He would ask me questions and i would feed him information as needed. It seems somewhat similar. I considered it part of my session, as you did.

How nice that you are now feeling "whole" again.

[lauren_helene]

That is one awesome session Sunrise. good for you

sunny, it sounds wonderfully comfortable! I'd have been purring too, or curling up on the couch, dreamy.

[Lemon]

Sunny - That is so wonderful. I hope you can keep that feeling of comfort for a long time.

[sunrise]

Thanks for your comments and letting me share that with you, everyone.

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pinksoil wrote: You and your T sound like a great match in the world of client/therapist relationships. Sounds like you have most definitely found "the one" as far as Ts go.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">That made me feel all googly. So true.

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sister wrote: on some level he sensed exactly what you needed

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">sister, I never thought of that. But maybe so. I think they can pick up a lot on our unconscious communication. T has talked to me before about opening himself up to what the client's unconscious is saying to him.

I wonder if T's could charge a different rate if you just want to sit in their rooms with them? Full rate if you want them to talk? Half rate if you just want to be in their presence? JK!