Couch 114 - Take a Pew

Feeling a little better now. Thankfully.

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As long as said pew is in unaluna's church, I'm good!

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I could get behind worshipping a conga line goddess wearing a lampshade on her head and using big fancy words like "comestibles."

Although, she frowns on gambling dens.

The goddess thing works for me. And i don't like gambling either so that's all good too.

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Sitting on pews and gambling would not be much fun. You could see others' hands and they could see yours.

My driver's license expires in two days. Had to go to bureau of motor vehicles to renew it. I was sofa k...uh..scared I'd fail the eye exam. I passed.
Hallelujah! I can drive for six more years. Ha!

Congratulations, precaryous!

I only recently started seeing a t and I feel like my entire life was a lie. All the things I convinced myself were normal actually turn out to be horrible, I thought I've had no problem for past few years but turns out I've had anxiety all those years, and what I always do subconsciously turn out to be due to unresolved traumas. Very difficult to face and accept. I wish I could live in the delusion forever but that obviously didn't happen because thing started to go wrong and am now in therapy. Sigh.

At least you can now deal with these things. I have only been in therapy around a year, but I know how hard it is. Hugs.

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Yeah that's true. It is certainly an eye opening experience too...never got an outside perspective on my habits and painful memories before. I'm so bloody terrified before every session though haha

Obsessed with watching grocery hauls on YouTube - what is wrong with me and why do I find this so interesting?

I can so relate to the place you are describing, that you are in. It's not a comfortable place at the moment for me, and I'm sorry that you are there too.

It's been about two years that I've been working with my counselor, trying to sort this out. It feels like a cruel lie when you realize that your life has been so wrong. There is a sadness there for me, to look back and see the events that brought me to this place. There IS a thankfulness for the event that pulled the blinders off of me and I started learning the truth and started the healing and reeducation of myself.

I hope to encourage you, for whatever pulled your blinder off. There have been times that I wanted to say that "ignorance is bliss" and not push forward, but there is no freedom in that. Not the kind of freedom my heart is straining for.

I offer you an understanding hug, if you would like one.

I know what you mean. I still am!

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Hugs to you.

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Thank you ((df))

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What is a grocery haul? Like a grocery shopping spree?

Don't keep them all to yourself! Share some links! (I'm bored at work.)

I would like to know, too, EM.

I am watching the first episode of "Coupled"...I admit that I do love any show that has the potential to be a hot mess.

I love extreme couponing on TLC.

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My doc increased the dose of my thyroid medication- it's wild!.... I'm wild!...or something...

Yes, it is tough to realise that one's life a lie. Ignorance is indeed bliss in some such cases. But once one realises that, it's too late.

- example.

If you just search "grocery haul" on youtube it's fantastic lol

It's just people showing what they bought at the grocery store lol

I love any show that is a hot mess. The worse the mess the better...

Thank you so much for your reply. You've put this beautifully.
I feel slightly more comfortable now to be reminded that there's always someone out there who's in a similar position.

I suppose it's another no pain no gain thing. Without the pain in the past I would've been much less wise. Now I need to accept the cruel truth that my past was indeed painful in order to really move forward in my life. Recent events have made me realise that forgetting the past is not the same as moving forward from it but in fact it was as, or even less productive than dwelling on the past

Well, it's not a pleasant place to be, but writing this now, it really is a great learning process isn't it ☺

to you too

It's addicting and amazing. Seriously, it's a rabbit hole I oft get trapped in.