The Couch 116: Puns Tsar Terrible...

Thanks... I tried really hard to be better. I didn't work!

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Something from the Enz- Bold As Brass

Exactly 20 hoours to T.

Hugs to all.

I should find out more at some point this coming week!

I need a musical montage to speed up this move. ((sigh))

It's late. It's been a weird past couple of days.

I just want to say thank you for hearing me. Thursday night was so not good. Thank you for being there to just hear me.

I've hung out and just listened and commented a few times. I just wanted to really let you know that I think of y'all often and I'm very thankful you are there.

Wanted to share this with you. It reminds me of the couch.



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Hi Trailrunner. I am grateful to everyone here also. It's been a tough year and I'm ready for better times!!!

It has been tough. But, it's also been good. New and better things are coming. I believe that for you and for me!

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Went back and checked the link. It didn't work. Wanted to put this one here. It is important to me.



Hope this one works.

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The first link worked for me-very touching song!!

Reading other threads makes me furious. I have to not do that because it only hurts me. Since I have to be my own sole support person I have to start avoiding those things that break me down.

((((((Crocus))))))

If I ever post something hurtful please tell me so I can be more careful. You may not be referring to me, I just want to be sure I'm not causing pain.

Couch
I want to bring up something T said 6 months ago. He may not even remember he said it or the context.
I want to ask why he said it..i found it offending.

I guess his response could be i dont even remember it..but if i said it i m sorry.
Which will not help much.

Have u guys brought up something months ago that a T said to discussion? Did he remember it?

Hi incas! Yes,I have brought up something in therapy that the therapist did or said to upset/offend/or hurt me. Sometimes they don't remember but if you give them some context of what you two had been discussing sometimes they will remember.
What did your t say?

My t wouldn't remember unless I mentioned it immediately.

I have -- it usually results in my having to provide a lot of details i.e., "I said this and then you said this and then I said this and then you said x offensive thing" etc.

T would then say something like "I don't remember but if I said it, then this must've been what I was thinking" or "This might've been what I was trying to convey".

So, I get the impression that she has a set of limited ways in which she responds and so, when I ask her stuff like this, she can usually just tell me based on the context I mention as to what she might've meant.

As in, I don't think the conversation is ever as free-style as it may appear to clients -- T's just say the same stuff / type of stuff in multiple different ways (based on the client's issues) with some variations here and there if something truly significant / momentous has come up.

Good luck bringing it up!

The first one I see can't remember what she said last week. A month or more would be impossible.

Incas, I've done that, and my therapist pretty much always insists she never said such a thing, but then adds/mumbles that she can be a blurter, which is the closest I get to an acknowledgement. But it never really goes beyond correcting it to mean what she might have intended. I don't think it's realistic to expect them to remember their own words from that far back, unless it's a thing they always say to people (similar to what awkwardly says). I've found that it does help, in some way, to at least bring it up as a way to let it go.

We had a rupture...next session he asked me to lead the session..putting me on the spot...we had done an assessment last session..so i asked i wou ld like the results...n v discussed it whole session.
Next session...he again put me on spot to lead...n added that last session was a not good use of our time and he hopes this session is not same.

I felt he was still mad at me after i apologized via email for my part in rupture(no response from him) no acknowledgemnt in session.

I felt he no longer wanted to work with me ... and he was angry

His words still sting....that i wasted our time in that session. Eventhough i found the results useful.

Oh yeah, I would definitely bring this up until it gets resolved.

I don't believe in letting a therapist tell me what is or is not a waste as to how I am choosing to use the time I pay for. A client cannot waste a therapist's time - they get paid for their time.
I see that sort of maneuver by the therapist as a blatant attempt at manipulating the client to do what the therapist wants - and I refuse to let the therapist be in charge of me.

I'd definitely bring it up. FWIW I nearly always "waste" time in a session before a big break through. The energy therapist I see ( different from my therapist T) and I spent an entire session talking about candy and I felt awful for wasting her time. She said "just let it be". Next session we had a huge breakthrough that was very healing.

So I highly unsympathetic toward your T. If he has a brain he should know that you are never "wasting" time ....

We need a new couch. Does anyone have a name or want to volunteer?